>>16971589
Ya that's why I just never date.

>>16971604
>as if you had a choice

>>16971589
It really sounds like you're hanging out with the wrong people.

>>16971604
I feel kind of the same way because relationships are about trust right? Wanting side dick? A-OK. Lying to my face for months while telling me you're in love with me while fucking the guy from work in his Jeep? Not OK. Only because how am I supposed to trust you with a child when you can't even admit to yourself or me that you have unfulfilled [insert cheating reason here]? Short answer is that I can't trust you with kids. or really anything important.

I'm not perfect. I understand why women cheat. I get it. I've cheated. I get it. Why can't people just be honest though?

Like my current girl. Always super private with her phone. I know she has ex fuck buddies that hit her up. There are large periods in the day when she's at work... but her work is mobile throughout the city. When i try to talk to her about cheating, she gets pissed that i don't trust her.... it's like come the fuck on lady. Could you be totally innocent and just be a super private, mobile girl who gets hit on a lot and likes to get angry at adult conversation? Sure.... but come the fuck on. Chances of faithful? I'd say 10%. Chances of having done SOMETHING to be getting so pissed about when I try to talk about it? 90%.

>>16971589
Femanon here. Generally I try not to think about it until I actually witness it happening/see solid proof of it. I've been cheated on in my last relationship (he slept with one of my closest friends). It hurt like a bitch for a few weeks finding out but what they did disgusted me even more than it hurt so i just dropped them like a couple of hot potatoes. I regret nothing

>>16971626
You see I used to believe this Anon. Grew up in that type of household where both parents were just like "no, don't do it, not worth it, destroy the world, etc."

But reality is reality. 25% of married women already admit to cheating based on surveys, so probably double that for women who don't admit it. Then there's real life experience - Like I said, I've cheated and been cheated on. Then there are friends that I've had... and oh my god the fucking horror. My ex roommate used to fuck this girl in a relationship at work in his Jeep. The girl *got engaged to the boyfriend*... and it didn't affect her desire to keep fucking my friend. In fact, my friend (who readily cheats) does draw the line at married women so he stopped when she got engaged. This only made her want him more. This same guy has watched girls skype with their boyfriends and then fucked them after they hang up.

In my own case, I've been aggressively pursued by women... and then suddenly POOF there's the boyfriend and I feel like an asshole because I didn't know. These women act like nothing is wrong when their boyfriends are shaking my hand...that's been inside of their girlfriends.

It's so fucking easy to cheat and get away with it.

>>16971641
How did you find out?

>>16971650
I walked in on them.

>>16971655
Oh fuck nuggets that's rough. Now that you have that solid proof, did you think back on his behavior? Were there signs you missed?

>>16971642
>Like I said, I've cheated and been cheated on. Then there are friends that I've had... and oh my god the fucking horror. My ex roommate used to fuck this girl in a relationship at work in his Jeep. The girl *got engaged to the boyfriend*... and it didn't affect her desire to keep fucking my friend.
You see, that's a big difference between us. I know cheating happens, but I don't do it, and so I hold the people close to me to a higher standard. If they do it, and I find out, I cut them off. If you're consistently being cheated on, you're probably attracted to certain character flaws that typically go hand-in-hand with cheating. Same thing with guys that always end up with mentally ill women. There are certain red flags that are there, and for whatever reason, you're blind to them.

>>16971667
>There are certain red flags that are there, and for whatever reason, you're blind to them.
Your holier than thou attitude is showing. i actually have friends of all colors and stripes. I accept people for who and what they are without letting it poison me.
>notice the "ex" in "ex roommate"
But please, continue believing that if only you "pick the right people" you'll never go through this.

^^ totally false. It's BECAUSE I accept people that i actually get the truth from them. Your super holy non cheater friends? At least one of them is cheating right now. Why do I feel confident saying this? Because people admit their cheating to me, usually out of guilt like a confession to a priest. Do you even know how many men and women I've known for a fact to be cheaters when literally everyone in their lives think their shit doesn't stink?

C'mon anon. Why do you think this bothers me so much. It's because I K-N-O-W how people actually act. How? Experience. Lots and lots of experience.

But hey if you just want to dismiss me like that, feel free.

>>16971589
>constant emotional detachment
>avoiding developing relationships with the opposite sex beyond casual acquaintances
>general apathy towards romance in general
if i find myself in a situation where I am dating/catching feels, I will cut it off cold if I know/suspect/can reasonably imply that they're cheating.

>>16971658
Well, i knew they were close. But i never suspected because I'm an idiot and I trusted them both. Initially of course I did try to think about it and why and how it happened right under my nose, even tried to kill myself because i felt so stupid. But i realized, "eh, why do i get to die while they go on living like the pieces of shit they are?" No other way to go from there but forward, so

>>16971678
>Your holier than thou attitude is showing.
I'm honestly not, I just hold myself and my loved ones to different standards. Not better, not worse, just different.

>i actually have friends of all colors and stripes. I accept people for who and what they are without letting it poison me.
Same. But I consider cheating to be one of the worst things out there, next to theft, rape, murder, etc. People don't seem to understand how emotionally damaging something like that can be. I don't keep people like that around me because I want them to know that's it's not acceptable. If they want to turn around their life, that's another story.

>But please, continue believing that if only you "pick the right people" you'll never go through this.
You can be blindsided, that does happen. But if you're like OP in that it happens consistently, you're not paying attention.

>It's BECAUSE I accept people that i actually get the truth from them.
It's not accepting them, it's looking the other way. But you can call it what you want.

My friends always come to me with their advice and secrets, and if they're doing something that could potentially hurt them or someone they love, I'm honest about how I feel and how the situation will probably play out. I help people straighten out their lives because I'm to the point and I don't hide how I really feel.

>Your super holy non cheater friends? At least one of them is cheating right now.
I don't know where you're getting this from as I never said that they haven't done anything bad in their lives. But when they confide in me, I tell it like it is.

>It's because I K-N-O-W how people actually act. How? Experience. Lots and lots of experience.
You don't know who you're talking to. If you won't consider my advice, and instead take it as a dis, then I'll leave it at that. Best of luck to you, OP.

>>16971589
I talk to my partner a lot, openly and honestly. We've been effectively and successfully monogamous for a number of years now, but early in our relationship, we both hooked up with other people a few times. We admitted it. And freaked out, and fought, and briefly broke up. But while we were apart we both decided that we wanted each other more than other people, so we got back together and have worked on openness and trust ever since. Long-term commitment, kind of a pain in the ass. But it worked and we are now happily married with kids,

>>16971589

being cheated on nearly killed me.
i went on a spiral of self destruction
that ended up with me dying of a heroin overdose but getting revived.

recently had a brief stint with this chick her persued me... turns out she was very into persuing multiple guys at the same time. yet she wanted a relationship. she was the type that would struggle to tell the truth about little unimportant lies. so i told her to fuck off.
ive never cheated myself because i couldnt do it. ive had the opportunity too.

If you've cheated as well u should just stay quiet desu. That goes for all of you

>>16971642
Wow. You summed up my point of view..... I've been fucking around within single, married, separated and divorced women for 20 years. Love it.

make her know that according to a psychiatrist i am psycothic, always doped and that if i discover her she better change of identity

>>16971589
be the asshole who fucks other people's girlfriends.
or find someone you can dominate mentally.

pretty much you have to believe that you're the best thing possible for them.

work on yourself, adopt this mindset, and more importantly LIVE it.

you can't just think 'oh if this girl doesn't come back then she's doing me a favor', no, you have to actually BELIEVE IT.