>friend of mine was bullied/abused and touched as a kid by students
>claims she used to be a cutter but stopped
>currently bulimic
>im the only person she has ever told, not even her family knows (why me...)
>apparently im her only friend
>shortly after telling me, she goes to a counselor and finally tells her mother about the bulimia but not everything
>me: "you probably should tell her everything..."
>apparently, her father constantly makes her feel like a failure and compares her to her successful sister
>last night, they get into a nasty argument
>i spend hours trying to help her through it
>eventually she says something along the lines of "maybe hes right. maybe i am worthless/good for nothing"
>for some reason (to my surprise), i get pissed off and think shes being ridiculous. self destructive
>i try to give her tough love and lecture her
>for the first time ever, she shows aggression towards me. tells me maybe i should just stop talking to her "since shes not good enough for me"
>goes to bed angry
>hasnt messaged me all day, which is a first
Outside of this drama, she's actually an amazing friend. My life is millions of times worse than hers yet I still try my very hardest to help her through everything. I'm starting to think that she might be a lost cause. Her situation has made her obsessed with her physical appearance. She's a 25 year old virgin, works out almost everyday, is convinced that she's unattractive even though I think she's beautiful... and she claims that she cries for up to 10 minutes sometimes after she masturbates (???). Do you think it was wrong of me to be hard on her?
This bitch sounds like a major drama queen. She's got WAY too many sob stories to tell.
>>16950695
I'm trying to be nice about it but self injury should have been a big enough sign...
It's just a shame because, like I said, she's an incredible friend, when things are normal. I don't want to lose her but I guess she's too troubled and not tolerating/behaving properly. She told me right off the bat that she has a habit of pushing people away and she can't get herself to stop. She's a sexy woman and looks great even without makeup but is completely alone in life.
You are in a tough situation, people go so long feeling inferior, less valuable, developing low self-esteem that they forget what it is like to actually feel positive and feel good about themselves.
I don't think it was wrong of you to be "hard' on her, but understand that these types of people are triggered by any sign of hostility, their way of coping with all the negatives in their lives is simply to ignore them and shut them/people out. People like this will shut you out before you get a chance to fully explain your position.
With these types of people, it is better to be nurturing, and nice. The key to all this however, is to be critical and FIRM, establishing a safe and secure medium, while trying to convey your message in a "Nice" way without scaring them away that seems non-threatening to them.
Good luck
>>16951021
>People like this will shut you out before you get a chance to fully explain your position.
She hasn't been on skype all day. Before this, she used to have trouble sleeping until she would hear from me. She'd literally pass out moments after finally getting a text. She might even stop talking to me completely.
Oh well. Thanks for your post.
>She's a 25 year old virgin
She could change that within an hour if she really wanted to.
>>16951084
Yeah, I don't think she understands exactly the power that women have.
Don't they say that people who avoid sex for long periods of time become addicts when they finally try it.
if you like her so much why don't you marry her, you're already putting up with her bullshit as if you are in a relationship
>>16951132
>why don't you marry her
i havent heard this since middle school
>>16951132
Trying to be a good person - I care. Maybe you should attempt it
>>16951132
>if you like her so much why don't you marry her,
Holy shit, that's retro.
>>16950689
Is there anything else that might be bothering her? Debts? Anxiety? Lost pets?
>>16951248
Not that I'm aware of
Try to don't to get manipulated.
Bulimic person can lie on everything.
You are shure she was a cutter?
You're her emotional dump. This won't bring you any advantage, if you're not looking for one for enduring so much.
And if you aren't, why are you enduring it? She's toxic, won't get better, and is already draining energy from you. Look up ''Emotional Vampires''. Luck for you.
