>I don't see one of these active right now, so.

Look harder. Can't be bothered to broach my problems to some kid who can't even skim the catalog.

What do I do about the fact that everything I try in life seems to be an attempt to stave off the inevitable boredom and apathy which naturally comes on with age, hormonal changes and the loss of libido?

I'm haunted by the notion of the male ego which has given up, yet acceptance seems just as hollow. I feel like fighting against it is basically denying the reality of ageing and the loss of potential and possibility brought on by the competitive nature and insecurity of youth.

I accept that the leading cause of death in men under the age of 50 is suicide and I can kind of see why. I suppose the only reason why it stops after the age of 50 is because it self selects either those who have come to terms with existence or have found something I have yet to find.

>>16942009
Difference between being in the catalog and being actively posted on. Married oldfag started his thread up again at about the same time that I posted this, so.

But it seems like your problem might be some obvious unnecessary aggression, and you should work on finding healthy outlets.

>>16942021
First, you have to "accept the fact," I will not say that anything you said is inaccurate, there is some truth to them. But there is a difference in how you can interpret it. Of course, everything you try is just an attempt to delay inevitable boredom, but that does not mean that you should simply stop trying to delay boredom and give in to despair. When I became an athiest I began to appreciate life a lot more, because this is all there is. And once you accept there is nothing "better," you can begin to appreciate what you have. Find hobbies you like, do them until you get bored, repeat.

Acceptance is only as hollow as you choose to let it bother you. If you accept the above, then interpret it in a fashion that you should do nothing, then you will experience nothing, and thus feel hollow. If you take it as motivation, you will experience more, and you will then be able to feel differently.

>>16942051
I've believe I've accepted the fact pretty well. It is just the burden that this places upon others which concerns me and the fear of being truly alone, as in lonely and isolated rather than existentially alone.

The world doesn't seem structured to accept those who reach this conclusion, everything pressurises you to press at this like tooth ache until you've figured out what is 'wrong'. I find it exhausting. I can see the pain that it causes my loved ones because they assume the flaw is within them.

Basically everything I've ever done has been to avoid a fear of appearing boring. I've needed to avoid appearing boring because I've wanted to compete amongst my peers for status and sex. I made the decision roughly a year ago to stop motivating with negative self image and insecurity and instead focus on positive self image and I've found myself to be a fairly transparent character.

I take action only if I truthfully want to do so for positive reasons. I try to motivate less by what I can get out of a situation, but by what I can bring to it and improve for others. I'm talking less, listening more, spending less, going out alone more, with others less, I've lost a bunch of weight.

Basically everyone thinks I'm depressed, I suppose I am, but this feels much more natural than chasing my own tail in an attempt to stave off fear and anxiety around how others will perceive me. Thing is, the anxiety and insecurity around the self is a rich artistic seam.

Instead it seems like I've taken on the ancient oriental pension plan of convincing myself to starve in quiet contemplation atop a mountain 40 years too young.