Let go ex gf
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
Had a toxic relationship with my (now ex) gf, and I decided to end it. She was manipulating me and doing things that really were kinda wrong. I even went to a psychologist and I got that answer (that she was a manipulator and a toxic person).
She still talks to me, because "she doesn't want me out of her life", and she still tells me very, very intimate/personal stuff.
I'm ok with that but she's acting in specific ways in front of me, like hugging dudes or her ex boyfriend (not me) just when i'm around. I never said something or reacted, but I don't understand why is she doing that since we already talked and we both agreed that "breaking up was the best thing to do".
This girl will go to a rural community as a volunteer for a complete year in a few months, and she told me that she will look for me when she comes back because "I have all what she wants" and stuff like that.
I love this girl because I had some great times with her, but I'm basically giving my dignity away by being with her, tolerating and accepting stuff that are just plain wrong. And I want to let her go.
It's hard to do this because she keeps talking to me, and to be honest, I don't know what her intentions are anymore, it seems that she doesn't want to be with me, but she doesn't want me with anyone else. I feel like fucking Milhouse.
Any tips?
Stay away and try to avoid her maybe?
Anon, remove her from your life immediately. You and your psych already said it. She is toxic and manipulative. Blocking her on all social media and not talking to her is the antidote. Don't let her have power over you or your emotions. Move. On. Trust me, you'll feel better as time goes on.
>>16941181
Thanks for the advice, I know that's what I have to do. She's scary because she said stuff like "I saw you as someone that I would marry", very creepy stuff.
I see her in a daily basis and I can't avoid that (College). These 2 weeks I'm able to avoid her luckily. But I need a way to overcome that without getting out of school...
![4872677[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/s8I09gL.jpg "4872677[1].jpg")
>>16941191
You're her security blanket.
See image.
>>16941212
Oh hell no, i'm not a freaking object to be used and be loved just when she "feels like it".
I guess I will find someone "healthy" in the future. This is scary and dissappointing
>>16941212
The weirdest thing is that last week she talked to me about a dude that's flirting with her... Can't believe I asumed and accepted that as normal
>>16941240
She's trying to keep you in her loop, maintaining an intimate relationship with you by sharing like she shares with her girlfriends.
I've had this happen before, where I've broken off a relationship and said we'll stay friends and suddenly it's like being her confidant and conspirator. I assume it's because they feel comfortable enough to tell me these things and because it's an extension of the intimacy we've previously shared, something she's hanging onto because there isn;t anyone to fill the gap (yet).
For whatever reason she does it I don't really care but I let it go for a while because I'm curious and then when I've had enough explain I don't want it to continue.
"I feel like fucking Milhouse"
Kek
>>16941260
Lol not that. Milhouse isn't my type anyways
>>16941191
Yeah, you really need to cut her out in all aspects. Her intentions are just that, to manipulate and control you. Even if you see her in person, just ignore her and go about your day. This will drive her crazy. If you're ready, move on. See other girls. Don't go out of your way, but if she finds out, it will drive her insane also and she'll try to contact you more possibly. RESIST IT. Remember, she's poison. You're a bad ass mother fucker and she lost out on you. That's all you have to remember.
So, what are you going to do anon?
>>16941256
I stopped communication right after we broke up for a week or 2, then we ended up as friends. I like talking with her, she's not my confident but she's interesting and I can hace good conversations with her. But I can't if she will do stuff that hurts without controlling her feelings. Last week she called me "sweetheart" and kissed me "by accident and unconsciously" yeah...
I'm affraid keeping that will do more harm than good
>>16941268
Be a badass and move on like you said my friend. I can't believe I felt guilty at some point when I never did anything wrong, or at least what she did.
While i was depressed and feeling bad she was dating her "just friend" that confessed his love to her a week after we broke up. Funny, she told me they were just friends when he invited her to a bar back when we were together, and I had no problem with that because I trusted her. Same with her ex, she's her best friend and it's all hugs and happiness in front of me.
Thank you for helping me to see reality. She just wants me to wait for her the whole year like a stupid while she has fun
She wants the good stuff and intimacy without any kind of sacrifice or compromise. Nope, that's totally crazy
