>>16922605
Meh, she might even be bi - more chance for a threesome mate :D

>>16922616
I like her in a long term relationship way, I want to be her boyfriend not just have sex

>>16922605
True lesbians don't exist. If you dick her well enough she'll go back to normal.

>>16922605
They key here is communication, just ask if she's considers it as a date and tell her that you're genuinely interested in her.
Just keep your actual crush to yourself until you've actually spend some time with her because it's kinda creepy for man to confess her "feelings" to a girl he barely knows and isn't very intimate with.

>>16922710
how do you ask somebody if they consider it a date without coming across poorly?

>>16922710
Don't do this. Feel up her pussy through her clothes and gauge her reaction. If she doesn't force you to stop, feed her the dick.

>>16922605
You really can't tell if she's a lesbian or not until she tells you. Relax. Take things slow. Get to know her more before reaching such conclusions. There's no need to rush right? It's best to keep your feelings hidden for now (because it sounds like an obsession desu).
Just a thought: If she was a lesbian and knew you were interested in her she would have probably turned you down for a date/hanging out.

>>16922824
the thing with the date is the way I asked her out, she actually asked me out first and we went to get food that she paid for, so when I asked her out I made it seem like I was "paying her back" which I thought was just being playful but maybe thats all she sees it as

I dont know if she knows I'm interested in her, we've been holding each others eyes a lot when we see each other which is what made me think there was something going on, and her body language and intonation made me feel like she was interested, but we're sort of mismatched in a way that might make her think I would never possibly be interested in her

>>16922605
Even if she's a lesbian, she's still a great friend to have. She'll know how to help you more with women than almost anybody, and she can set you up with her straight friends.

>>16922605
Hmmm, you're in a pickle aren't you. Well I'm like that with my guy friends too - they pay for a meal and I return the favour as thank you. Women like to initiate eye contact, break away and then re-engage as subtle flirting. Just don't mistake niceness with interest. Some signs that she's interested: she asks you questions, she dresses to impress, wears perfume and would do anything to meet you. Not all females are the same tho, some will ignore you completely as a way of showing interest ahaha. You know what they say, opposites attract.
May I ask why you've started to think she was a lesbian?

I was afraid of this when a girl
Then hanging out with her was too fun so we cuddled

>>16922925
-she's asian and she changed her "western" name to shane, which is not only usually a males name its also the name of a popular character on the L word, a lesbian tv show. I dont know if she watches it or has even heard of it though

-she wears mens clothes, as in literally labeled mens and sold from mens stores not just the style. she dresses tomboyish and dressed down, which I really like and is part of what attracted me to her

-she chose to wear a suit and tie to our college formal instead of a dress, something that almost nobody does

-her personality is really relaxed and cool, she's independent and mentally strong

-she likes coding/math and videogames

-the last 2 girls I fell for before her turned out to be lesbian for real, not just rejecting me, which makes me wonder if for some reason I'm somehow attracted to some kind of lesbian personality

I feel like she is doing the eye contact flirting and when I'm around her I feel like there's something going on between us, I feel like there's sexual tension and interest, and I could write off everything about it down to just her being a bit different which is part of what I find attractive. but I dont know if its all because I'm so attracted to her that I'm seeing what I want to see and feeling what I want to feel.

>>16922616
Because bisexuals are automatically polygamous? C'mon.

OP, just try to bring up homosexuality or past boyfriends or some such thing and gauge her reaction.

>>16922726
Well don't really know how you've asked her out, but you could possibly just mention early on the date that you're a bit nervous because it's your first date or that you haven't been on a date in a while.
If she says she doesn't consider it as a date, you can simply say that you're mildly disappointed because you found her interesting and believed it was, then just tell her not to think too much about it and continue hanging out normally.

Most men tend to make too big of a deal about asking someone out which makes things way more awkward for them than it actually should.
Finding a girl interesting enough to date should be considered as a compliment towards the girl, not as confessing ones feelings or love.

This is a lot more mature approach to dating and should not really ruin your friendship even if she declines (unless she's really immature).
No matter what happens it'll make her look you in a very different way (a friend + potential mate) which is actually good thing as it might actually bring you two closer and will make it easier for you to be more open around her and flirt with her.

>>16922943 you may be gay urself m8

>>16922605
Have you ever asked why she changed her name to Shane? Maybe that will reveal her orientation. Heck just because a person is for same-sex marriage or has positive opinions on LGBT groups doesn't automatically make the person gay/les. I went to an all girls school, where one classmate wore a dress suit instead of a gown because she was more comfortable in them (for the record she was straight and bought her bf to prom). I suggest you don't over think things for now and just become good friends with her. It's not a date, you guys are just hanging out. If she is a lesbian and trusts you enough she will come out to you eventually.

>>16922968
alright I'll try to work in that I consider it a date casually somehow and see what her reaction is, I'm fine with being embarrassed myself I only care about ruining things if I actually do have a shot with her since I want it to work out between us

>>16922997
after the second girl I fell for turned out to be lesbian I spent some time trying to figure out if I was gay and I can say that I am definitely not gay and I definitely like girls

>>16923015
she had a more standard feminine name before and she said she didnt like it so she changed it, I didnt ask her why shane specifically but I should do that

none of the things by themselves really made me sure its just all of them together that makes me wonder, plus the fact that I was hurt really bad twice already and now its got me on edge

I definitely understand why she would choose to wear mens stuff, its more comfortable no question I've always said womens fashion is ridiculous in terms of wearability

the reason I wanted to know before is that I was planning on taking her on a bit of a romantic walking spot and I wanted to hold hands with her, but if she's lesbian and "thought I knew" or something it would be pretty inappropriate

>>16922605
It is pretty unusual for an Asian female to change her name to one that is more masculine. I'm thinking she's either lesbian or bi at this point. I would advise you not to hold her hand unless you guys make it clear with one another that the romantic interests are mutual. Perhaps after she tells you why she changed her name to Shane you can ask "Oh I see! Some might have mistaken you for being lesbian/gay with a name like that ahaha" and see if she corrects you. If she corrects you she's lesbian (time to move on), but if she states that she's straight perhaps then you can pursue her romantically.

>>16923107
yeah I think I pretty much have to figure it out in definite terms before trying any kind of physical escalation

the thing that I'm most worried about is that she is pretty shy, and she might simply not feel like saying something so outright. so even if I bring it up and give her an opportunity she might not say anything and I still wouldn't really know for sure. I could easily imagine going through the entire date triyng to bring it up and never finding out.

thats one of the things that confuses me the most is she acts really girly and shy around me

as far as the name goes there's some amount of ambiguity since shane kind of sounds like some feminine names in chinese and she might have chosen it based on its similarity to those names phoeneticlaly but I really have no idea

>>16922925
one other thing, she asks me a lot of questions and puts a lot of effort into talking with me, more than I do. she also seemed really into meeting up and when we were out together the first time we had a lot of fun. she puts stuff on the side to talk to me too. I never got the impression that she was anything but straight and into me until just today when I was looking at a picture of her in the suit and it hit me, and all the other details started coming to me. but now that the doubt is there I dont know how to get rid of it or if I should let it change how I'm moving things forward

>>16922605
Ask her directly. Say "hey I know this is a weird question but are you a lesbian?"

>>16923205
This is the only way to know for sure.

>>16922605
You seem to think there are only two options - either she's madly in love with you or she's a lesbian. The truth is most probably one of the dozens of intermediate alternatives.

>>16923244
its not like that at all, its that I was getting what I felt were signals and hints to start escalating to more relationship things like holding hands but the possibility of her being lesbian made me question the whole thing

>>16923205
what about asking a quesiton like "are you looking for a boyfriend" or something like that which doesn't bring up her being lesbian

>>16923294
That is too abrupt.

alright, I guess my plan is to go on the date, try and feel out how she is treating me whether as a friend or romantically, try to casually bring up lgbt and maybe boyfriend talk, and then try to have as much fun with her as possible either way things go

>>16922943
sounds like a huge dyke you dumb bitch

>>16922966
Bisexuality is a house with no walls.

>>16922605
it sounds like you're overthinking things anon

>>16923989
this is something I'm worried about too, that maybe I'm so worried about having things work out with her that I'm just inventing reasons for it to go wrong

>>16923931
this, true bisexuals are dangerous sexual deviants without exceptions