My boyfriend always wants sex and I don't know what to do. I've been dating this guy for 4 months and he is THE best boyfriend I've ever had. He's extremely nice, respectful, charming, funny, trustworthy, great looks and he has a great career but I just absolutely hate how pushy he is about sex and how much he wants it. He wants to have sex every time we see each other.
Then he makes me want it so bad by playing with my clit. Every time we see each other, he asks before hand to have sex and I usually have sex but he just makes me want it so bad. He's not using me for sex. I know for a fact he's not, he just has a really high sex drive. Every time I turn him down for sex, he doesn't get mad but he just gets annoyed. It's like he's a different person when he's horny.
Who's in the wrong here?
>>16921660
You are, you made the mistake of not posting your babylons
>>16921660
Don't see the problem here fampai.
young men are crazy. Older men won't pester you for sex. That's why most women prefer older men.
>>16921660
I mean, nobody's "in the wrong," but that sounds like most peoples' idea of a perfect relationship. He wants it all the time because he wants YOU. Do you enjoy it, or is he bad at it or something? I'm not really seeing the problem here
>Anons, I have the perfect boyfriend, he's got his shit together, he treats me well, and he can't keep his hands off me. Help! How can I fix this?!?
>>16921703
He's really good at sex, real good. All he has to do is play with my pussy and that makes me want but I just don't want to have sex sometimes but he still initiates it and I guess that makes me want it.
There are just times when I don't want to have sex and then when I turn him down he gets upset. He doesn't do it visibly but I can tell he's frustrated. Sex is the only thing we argue about. I asked him for a sex break because I think we have too much sex and he get mad at me. The first time I asked for a sex break was because I thought we were moving too fast then the second time I just thought we were having too much sex. I told him again I don't want to have sex for a while and he got upset. Not mad or arguing, just frustrated.
>>16921743
OMG he like play with my pussy an he makaaa my clit go briiiiiiirg and my pussy be like sshhhhh and my sexi still initiating and sex break sex mad though sex pussy shieeeeetttt
>>16921743
I dunno, but I bet if he dumps you for a girl who doesn't treat him like a chore, and has a bunch of babies with her, you're gonna be kicking yourself and Facebook-stalking him for the rest of your life
>>16921743
So what's the problem.
You 'think' you're having too much sex? Why is that? You sore down there?
Or is there no reason.
He's upset because you're being really unreasonable.
Just jerk him off or something. Fuck.
>>16921660
no one is in the wrong here. you have differing sex drives, and due to this, your relationship likely will not work out. eventually, he will grow to resent being turned down (or lose his confidence through thinking you arent attracted to him), and you will come to believe that he is only after the pussy (or notice his lack of confidence and resent him for it). the only variable is which one of you will break first and terminate the relationship. or cheat. or whatever.
>>16921748
you should be banned from the entire internet
>he is THE best boyfriend I've ever had. He's extremely nice, respectful, charming, funny, trustworthy, great looks and he has a great career
Then why don't you love him?
I don't want to sound like some conservative faggot, but there's a little bit of truth to the 'women are submissive" thing; which is to say, women give unfettered sexual access to men when they are in love with them. There's still some barrier up within you that opposes him, which he has not conquered. Question is, why?
>>16921660
in all your posts it sounds like you're treating him as a pain in the ass.
this relationship won't work out.
and yes, sex drive is a part of a person. you can either go along with it, or not go along with it.
>>16921811
But I love this guy. He's just so goddamn horny all the time. I only want to have sex 2-3 days a week. He wants to have sex every single day, multiple times a day.
>>16921822
I get it, but here's the deal: Every relationship is give and take. It's never going to just completely conform to your preferences, because he's not an imaginary man you created to please you. What you've got right now is very, very good.
The thing is - and this isn't a judgment on either of you, it's just how shit actually works - what do you think is going to happen if you're keeping him 30-40% satisfied with his sex life, while you're 100% satisfied with your 2-3 days a week, and you expect him to still be monogamous? He's going to cheat, or he's going to leave you. It's not because he only wants sex, it's not because he doesn't really care about you, it's just that over time, all that rejection and denial and frustration is gonna make him wonder what else might be out there.
So is it really that bad to put out once a day? I mean, you definitely shouldn't do it if you hate it, but from what you've said it sounds like you enjoy it every time even if you think it's "too much."
What if you end up with some guy who's cold and has a lower sex drive than you do, and you're the one getting rejected when you're horny? What if you end up with a guy who's really awkward about initiating, and not any good at getting you turned on? Imagine any other kind of guy you can think of, and ask if you'd trade in your boyfriend for that guy.
If not, you might just have to make a little compromise here and there
>>16921822
that's exactly my point. the big question here is do you love him enough to give him what he wants out of a relationship
some guys and girls really see every day sex as an ideal in their relationship.
talk to him but don't say "let's have a sex break" because that just sounds like you hate him. instead talk about the frequency and what would be ideal for both of you.
>>16921822
Does he do anything to make you happy? Anything at all? If so, do you think he's doing those things because he "just likes it" or do you think he's doing it to make you happy? If the latter, then you should be doing things to make him happy. Once a day doesn't sound unreasonable if you're young. When I was younger I wanted to fuck my girlfriend multiple times a day. Younger males inherently have high drive and understanding that will make things much easier for you. It's interesting, cause older women will often talk about things like "maintenance sex". They use different words for it, but it's essentially a pragmatic approach to "I don't necessarily want it, but I understand that his level of need is different and he's generally way more awesome when he's had some". This, in a relationship, is literally no different than "my wife is much more happy when I clean up after myself and get her flowers for no reason just so she knows I care". Our brains function a little differently on that level, and if both partners understand it, it's really good.
>>16921854
>What if you end up with some guy who's cold and has a lower sex drive than you do, and you're the one getting rejected when you're horny?
This will literally happen to you with 100% certainty once you hit your 30s.
It's okay to not want to have sex, OP. It's not okay for your partner to pressure you into sex. If you can't come to terms on this then you two are probably not compatible.
>>16921867
He goes out of his way to make me happy and I feel bad because I don't do shit except just be with him you know. He pays for all of our dates, buys me nice presents and hell, one time my car broke down 230 miles from my house and he got out of bed at 1 in the morning to help me fix it on the side of the highway.This is was only a month into us dating. He helps around my house with my mother and my parents love him as well. You don't find guys like this anywhere. I love this guy. I fell for him almost as soon as I saw him because he's just so different and such a fucking amazing guy but I just hate how pushy he is about sex.
>>16921877
Incorrect. If you enter willingly into a monogamous sexual relationship with another person, you implicitly agree to do your part to satisfy their emotional and physical needs. Communication is key, but if you are not willing to bend or alter your way of thinking/acting to come to a point in the middle with your partner, you are not mature enough to be in a relationship and ever single one you ever have will fail.
>>16921880
You're completely admitting that he's perfect for you and goes above and beyond and you found one thing to make a big deal about. You don't want to be in a relationship. Figure out how to let yourself be loved and give this guy a fucking break. Also examine how broken you have to be to take this stance. I mean, read what you wrote.
You enjoy having sex. He wants it a lot. If you had sex with him a lot, you would.......enjoy it a lot? I have known women like you before and if I knew this guy I would tell him to run immediately.
>>16921782
No, I love the guy. He gets what 4chan is.
He was probably a virgin like pegasus and just wants to get laid to make up for the lost time, since like pegasus he's probably 25 and living at home.
>>16921880
But what does he do that's "pushy?" From what you've said, he gets a bit frustrated when you reject him. He doesn't even say so, you can just tell he isn't thrilled about it. That's not pushy. Lots of guys are pushy, and it's a completely different story.
I mean he's an independent person with his own feelings, he's not always just going to react exactly how you want. Build yourself a robot if that's what you're looking for
>>16921893
Do you have alerts for whenever I post?
>>16921743
So you cut out something he clearly values quite a bit and he doesn't get mad. He doesn't yell. He doesn't give you the cold shoulder. He sticks with you. He gets "frustrated" quietly and continues to be awesome for you.
I'm beginning to think you really have some issues you haven't dealt with. Not trying to be presumptuous but this is the best example of someone trying to sabotage a relationship that I have ever seen.
>ITT: anon solves every single girl problem on this board by showing them exactly what NOT to do.
>>16921907
Do YOU have alerts for whenever I post?
>>16921660
He's not going to suddenly want less sex someday, so either put out or dump him. I've been with the same guy 15 years and he is still as fucking horny as he was when we were 17. If your be is as great as you say he is, then he deserves it (like mine does). Men need sex like women need to be told they're beautiful, some need it more than others, it's tied to their ability to bond, it's tied to their self worth, it's tied to their work ethic. Sounds like you just have a low libedo, good luck with that.
>Asks for sex?
Who the fuck does that? If he would just start off with the fingering (like mine does) he would get a lot farther. You should tell him that.
>>16921931
No, I just see you
>>16921950
You're not necessarily giving advice, but there's no way you can convince me you aren't a single male in your late teens/early 20s
>>16921887
There's a difference between meeting in the middle and slavishly satisfying another's desires. It's fine to have things that one refuses to budge on.
>>16921956
I'm a 32 year old happily married mother of two. Sorry I can't convince you, it's just not my problem. I don't have much of a libedo, but like OP my man is magic with his fingers. If I don't have sex with him out of appreciation for how awesome he is, he finds a way to wiggle his fingers into my net hers and it's pretty much over.
I sadly recognize, however, that my marriage is not exactly the norm.
>>16921979
Please tell me something that would be middle ground for this
please help me
>>16921989
You're making this seem so much more dramatic than it really is. If you really don't want to have sex, just say "no, I'm serious, not tonight"
>>16921979
nope. it isn't unless it specifically causes you physical harm or is unreasonable within the agreed upon bounds of the relationship. And nobody said she needs to spend the entire day bent over waiting for him, they said she should fuck him more and quit bitching. Which she should.
>>16921989
The crux of the issue is that you don't like how he acts when he isn't getting any. It's one thing if he wants sex 7 times a week, but can settle for 3 or 4. It's another thing if you just don't like his attitude when he doesn't get it, then you're fighting a losing game.
Guys wth high libedo are just like this, you can't help the way you feel. And a lot of guys are just bummed out when their woman rejects them. Sounds stupid to some, I know. But I would rather live with a happy man than a sullen man any day of the week, and there are plenty of men who would be happy with 2-4 times a week.
Dip any lower than that, and you're just going to be perpetually frustrating a dude.
>>16921989
>middle ground
Stop focusing on the fact that he wants to have sex a lot, focus on the 957 other rad things he does and make a conscious effort to fuck him. You're thinking about it too much, which again is something I've seen women do before and it's a recipe for failure.
It's like a guy saying "she's absolutely perfect but she always wants me to go out of my way to show my affection for her". It's ridiculous.
>>16921660
thats all you're good for, stupid bitch, you're born to be fucked, accept it
>>16921989
Well either way you need to have an adult conversation about the issue. Not during sexytimes, more like at the kitchen table. Tell him how you feel and that you want to make things work for both of you.
But I do think
>I don't do shit except just be with him
is a little concerning. Does he want your affection in ways other than sex? Can you work harder in those areas? As it stands, it sounds like you two are putting different levels of effort into the relationship, and it really takes two.
>>16922037
>within the agreed upon bounds of the relationship
You write a contract or somesuch, breh?
Literally complaining about the perfect boyfriend. Get the fuck out of here
>>16921950
>>16921987
Resident Homemaker?
>>16922064
>write a contract
There is an implied agreed upon contract, when entering into a relationship, that both partners will attempt to meet emotional/sexual needs in the relationship. Beyond that, if there are issues, there needs to be adult discussions about what one wants and how the other can help with that. I didn't even know what a real relationship was until I found a girlfriend that actually expressed her needs and wanted me to express mine. It was like a revelation. I want more blowjobs. Hey honey, I think you should suck my dick more. Ok, I will try but here's why I don't, can you change what part of that relates to you? Sure. More blowjobs occur.
Or conversely, hey honey I feel like you don't do enough foreplay so that makes me less excited about sex sometimes. Ok, here's why there's been less foreplay lately. Here's what we can do to change that. Ok, she's making an effort, I gotta remember to spend more time on foreplay. Awesome sex occurs.
Being resentful and forgetting the plethora of other things a partner brings to your life is 99% because of a lack of honest adult communication about your needs. If you run into a situation where the other partner is absolutely unwilling to budge, then you should probably move on, cause it's both your jobs to compromise.
>>16922089
Nah, she doesn't have kids yet does she? I work part time freelance from home, it's not a lot, but it means we don't have to pay for childcare and some extra fun money.
>>16922112
Ah sorry. I believe she does have two young children as well.
>>16921782
He's grown on me and I usually end up agreeing with him on most things. Tripfags are still cancer but Pegasus is a necessary cancer.
>>16921748
kekking irl
((but most of your post make the suckkyteim please up quality thank u))
I broke up with my girlfriend for partially this reason. She switched birth control pills for medical reasons and her sex drive completely dropped (I realized, this after I broke up with her). It really sucked when I came over given my schedule (studying fully time + working 2 jobs) and she say "I'm tired, not to tonight". This continued for awhile, slowly I got less and less happy and flat out started talking to other girls in class, at work. (She also said I drank too much, which was confusing but I seldom had time to drink in the first place, but w/e).
I starts analyzing the situation to see if I was the one who was all fucked up or if it was her. Talking to girls who were just receptiv and pleasant was extremely refreshing. I eventually broke up with my GF she flipped shit and Saïd " i only wanted her for sex, cheated on her".
I didn't come remotely close to cheating with her, but I can totally she how it happens.
Been single since and haven't had sex since I broke up with her ( late 2014), granted, i've mived twice, but I'm much happier for doing this.
Sex drive will probably one of the key things I look once I'm in my next relationship.
Eventually if your bf isn't sastified he will looks elsewhere, whether or not he actually cheats on you is one thing, but he will eventually break up with you
>>16921660
You're still in the honeymoon period of the relationship. As soon as you breath in his general direction his dick is already aimed at your babbymaker.
Just wait a few months, then reassess if hes really into you or not. In the mean time, if you dont want him to get "horny and annoyed" stage, how about you stand up for yourself and not let his hands near your holes in the first place...
>>16921660
>Who's in the wrong here?
you, if the problem is that your sex drive isn't high enough to match his and you haven't properly communicated that to him in a neutral area at a time when he hasn't already asked for sex, he doesn't know he's doing you wrong.
honestly it sounds like you're just making problems out of nothing if "pushy" is taking no for an answer and not throwing a tantrum.
OP I am in a similar spot with my GF of one year. Initially we would have sex like 4-5 times per day. She would always take care of me, and do literally anything I asked of her (sexually). Now we have sex like 2 times per week. My girlfriend says it's her new birth control, but the way she goes about it is really disheartening. I have a fairly high sex drive but 80% of the time when I try to initiate sex I get told that I'm so horny all the time, I should be happy just cuddling with her, etc.
I can tell you right now that this is NOT the way to go about it. I got super insecure at first and thought it was my performance, and now I'm at the point where it just feels like I'm being denied, like she is withdrawing herself from me. It isn't even the case, but the way she tells me she doesn't want to have sex really makes me resent her. I don't get "mad", but I do get annoyed and it leads to us arguing about other things.
>>16921660
The only thing woman even bring to the table in a relationship is their pussy and womb. You think it is fun hanging out and dealing with you emotional leaches? Fuck no its not. All you do is ride on the backs of mens status/resources.
What is so hard about laying back and getting fucked? You better start before he finds the red pill and dumps your ass on the street for a girl who WILL fuck him.
Cunt
>>16921891
>>16922417
I love you too
>>16924001
anti bump
Since you aren't willing to meet his sexual needs, you should find him a side-girl that he can fuck when you're not into it. I mean, he seems to be perfect in every regard, and all he wants from you is one thing, which you aren't willing to give him. Help a guy out.
You guys some weird mother f*ckers up in here. Welcome to 4chan I guess.
You have differing sex drives. That point is obvious. You need to:
Sit down and talk about this.
Find a compromise, if you want the relationship to work. You might have to give a little more, and he will definitely have to slow his roll a bit.
All these people telling you to open your legs for your boyfriend are idiots. Yes, he has a higher sex drive, but that doesn't mean the ball should be in his court and you should drop panties every time he wants it. Having sex 2-3 times a week is pretty damn good if you ask me, and if he wants more than that then he needs to buy himself a sex doll and pound away until he grows the fuck up.
At 22-24 (I'm 28 now), I was insatiable. My first girlfriend gave it to me anywhere and anytime, so when the second girlfriend rolled around i expected the same and was frustrated when it didn't happen. Things ended, my hormones went down a bit, and I realized how much of a tool I was being.
That, and I also went through a bad birth control story where an ex's sex drive went from 5x a week to once a month. It sucked, but it made me appreciate the times I did have sex more. It started becoming less quickies and more hour long sessions.
Sexual compatibility can be big issue. If he is pushy with his sex and it's more than you can handle, then realize he is not the "perfect boyfriend". It's just another part of being able to work with each other.
So yeah, talk it out and find a compromise or break up. But don't follow everyone else advice here and just bend over whenever he pleases.
Dude. I can't-
IF YOU ENJOY IT EVERY TIME WHAT THE FUCK IS THE ISSUE?!
This has to be a troll. Please, please be a fucking troll. Your problem is only problematic because you're stubbornly insistent upon sticking to a line of thinking that makes no damn sense whatsoever for reasons you've yet to explain in this thread. If this statement proves unfair I'll gladly take it back but fuck you, fuck you a thousand times to hell and back, you naive utter friggin moron.
>How. Just fucking how. He hasn't so much as even fucking *looked at me* in almost two months. How is this the third time I'm in a relationship where the one who's allegedly supposed to have the higher and far more robust sex drive has just completely stopped wanting us to ever fuck anymore?! Jfc I haven't been hounded for sex since fucking high school. Fuck this gay earth.
And fuck you too. Steady great sex regularly? Your "problem" is literally enviable. Even if the sex sucked half the time I would be thrilled beyond belief to be getting laid every day. Yes I jelly. Yes I'm buttmad. Yes I'm aware of how I sound right now. No I don't give any fucks. Nor get any, for that matter. ... Please eat shit at your soonest possible convenience, OP.
Neither of you are in the wrong here. One of you is being exceedingly and unreasonably stupid it seems, but neither are "wrong". Differing libidos have little to do with right/wrong and much to do with in-/compatibility.
>thank you btw; I'm trying to work on my anger, and you made it real, real easy
match his sex drive. take maca, drink cocoa with no sugar and jog regularly.
>>16921748
Keep up the quality posts!
Im laughing so hard lol
Thank you bb
he likes fucking you.
and you dont like it so often.
either you talk to him about slowing down. or you will continue to be fucked constantly. i wish i was you i want a bf to always be with me like this. fuck man
>>16921908
This. Get over yourself missus and suck his cock already.
>>16921660
lel you only have one job for the shit your boyfriend is putting up with and you can't even do that.
>>16921660
>He wants to have sex every time we see each other.
>Then he makes me want it so bad by playing with my clit.
Y'all in this thread can't even tell when you get trolled. Who in hell would ever complain about their boyfriend always getting them hot and bothered and wanting to fuck so bad?
>>16921887
Rapiest thing I've read today. If you have to mindfuck and force yourself to have sex, it won't be enjoyable and your partner DOES notice on some level. Jesus fucking Christ...
>>16923548
imo all these idiots just need to go out and meet new peoples in lifes. There is a starving ethiopian baby who doesnt haz food and what do u pussiful advice givers do? Focus on a damn wrench that is whining about a retard she could just dump. Its not like the US has no men in it except him.
