Did she bring this up on her own volition?

You know, usually I'm all for leaving a cheater, but honestly I'd let that slide. It's stupid as fuck, but at least it was just something through a computer screen.

>>16919701
Kinda. She got a little drunk and started saying she was a bad girlfriend and I deserved better because she's "never cheated but did some bad things that would hurt me" and when I asked her what she told me that.

>>16919708
Fuck I don't mean to have trips on this board.

>>16919708
People break up over snap chat nudes though. I'm leaning towards letting it slide since it wasn't physical touching but it's still pretty bad in my opinion.

My hands feel tied because it was almost 5 years ago.

>>16919712
Huh. I wonder what other bad things she has done (she did say it in plural, no?)...

I would move forward with caution. Don't forgive her just yet, and let her know that your trust in her has dropped. That she's going to have to make it up to you with time.

I agree with Poliwag here, in that I would probably let the omegle thing slide, as it was at the beginning and maybe she wasn't taking things as seriously as she has since.

Again, we can never know our partners in full, only trust that they are giving us their best selves.

What would you want her to do if the roles were reversed?

>>16919724
Yeah, if it had happened a week ago, then that's be an issue. And if it had been found out 5 years ago, it would be an issue. But 5 years ago and at the beginning of the relationship? I'd let it slide. But make sure she knows you have every right to be suspicious at this point.

>>16919734
She would go to bars and let guys hit on her and buy her drinks even though she wouldn't touch them or sleep with them.

Kind of lead them on more or less. She says it was for attention because she had low self esteem and that doesn't bother me as much as the webcaming.

I'm more angry that she waited 5 years to tell me. She said she did it because after a few months she "fell in love for real" and realized how bad it was and used it as motivation to be a better person and regretted it so much she didn't want to ruin our relationship over it.

She told me she didn't expect it to end up so serious in those first few months and she was just being dumb and ' bending the rules ' in the beginning, even though she fully admits that's full out cheating now.

Can people actually change like this or will she just do the same thing again next time we fight?

OP

>>16919771
Uhhhhh, that depends on how much she's changed as a person in general.

Is she stable?

>>16919781
I wouldn't say stable. She's changed a ton in 5 years, for the better though. She doesn't drink or party anymore unless it's social and even then she doesn't get drunk. She used to have bright neon hair and now she's normal and started going to the gym and stuff. Just generally got her life together since crazy highschool college days

>>16919694

>Being a cuck
>MMXI

>>16919712

>Bad things
>Things

More than one? "Some" bad things is vague as fuck. I'd be willing to bet that omegle cam sex was tip of the iceberg. She probably cheated on you physically.

Nah I'd dump her, but maybe it's just me. She's already proved she is not trustworthy. It's not that hard to start dating someone and not cheat. She's just telling you about omegle because she's too scared to be 100% honest about the full extent of her cheating and she wants to stay with you without feeling guilty. Don't play into her stupid games.

>>16919816
Holy shit she sounds like me.

She may very well have changed. Do be careful, though...caution is good, but chances are she knows what her life could consist of (shitty lifestyle and disrespecting herself) and knows that what she has with you is better. She may very well be trying to let go of her past and be there for you wholly...could definitely be a keeper.

>>16919890

Girls like this don't change permanently. You can keep telling yourself that you have changed but in reality you're just smothering the inner whore for a little while and when the right person comes along and the circumstances are right you'll regress right back.

>>16919982
Thanks for the advice, Anon--I will surely hold it close to my heart.

>>16919694
>but still she cheated on me.

that's not even cheating.

the first month you probably weren't even banging

you should reward shit like that, it opens the doors to exhibitionism and swinging and other kinky shit.

>>16919828
This

5 years later she just suddenly felt guilty for something she did one month after you started dating? Nah man. When girls reach critical mass of guilt, they let off some of the pressure by admitting to the less horrendous shit they've done.

She has cheated on you for sure, probably relatively recently.

Plus it sounds like she is trying to goad you into breaking up with her so that she won't feel guilty about dumping you.

This is the beginning of the end. You should dump with extreme prejudice. I bet you won't though.

keep
Everyone fucks up in some way or another at some point in their relationship. This is probably one of the more tame "mess ups" and if the guilt has fucked her up so much that she wants to "prove herself" and be the best gf ever then it's a blessing in disguise

>>16919694
>5 years
>Only telling you this now.
I don't care about the masturbating part. I don't care about the webcam part.

I care about the "waiting to tell me something I would care about until she thinks it'll be OK and I'll forgive her" part. I care about the trust. I care about enabling the behavior by rewarding her by staying with her.

I would calmly explain to her that she should have told me when it happened, not when she thought she could have gotten away with it. And if her response is the typical female weak willed horseshit:
>B-b-b-but I told you now! I didn't have to!
Then that would just reinforce to me that she was a weak person.

I'm not saying break up with her. I am saying sit her down and explain to her what i just explained - that the real issues are the trust and the "waiting" - and see how she responds. If she responds well... well then perhaps you should consider forgiving her if she's been good to you since. People make mistakes; try to channel Jesus here.

But if she lacks the maturity to realize her *true* mistakes - the trust and the waiting - then cut her to the curb immediately because your future is going to be a future of:
>4 years ago I took dick when you pissed me off and I'm only telling you now I'm super sorry.
No thanks.

>>16919756
>She says it was for attention because she had low self esteem and that doesn't bother me as much as the webcaming.
Me :>>16920721
And it most definitely SHOULD bother you. Those are the women who cheat on you and try to "feel bad" about it later. Those are the women who get into an argument with you and then think it gives them license to cheat. Those are the women who... well you get it.

"Low self esteem so I need male attention" women are the true whores of the world. Huge red flag.

>>16919694

It was early in the relationship for her to be attached. I say stay with her, but don't add or ask for further drama.