>>16917408
You fucking wait until she's ready if you like her that much. Pressuring someone into it leads to awkward painful sex, don't do it.

Ye op just wait man

>>16917408
Wait or leave her

Is there a right amount of encouraging I can do here or do I just let her make a move?
I'm thinking since she doesn't have experience she would need me to take charge since she wouldn't really know what to do etc, but at the same time I don't wanna come off as pushy or aggressive in a bad sense.

>>16917408
How old is she? Whether you want to admit it or not there comes a point where sex is expected in a relationship. It's rude of the other person to deny you at a CERTAIN point. Many courts will accept a woman's lack of sex as grounds for divorce -- so even the legal system agrees it's expected.

Now if you kids are just 17 to 20ish, and haven't even been together a few months, yeah, wait, but I can tell you as a 28 year old that hasn't been single for longer than 3 months since I was 17, if we aint fucking after the first month then your ass is getting dropped. Sex is a critical part of a relationship - anyone who says otherwise is a kid or inexperienced and hasn't held myltiple relationships that lasted multiple years. Sexual compatibility is a requirement, and no way am I getting too invested in someone before I know we are sexually compatable.

If she wants to wait, that's fine, but it takes two to tango, so if respect is equal in the relationship then you both have an equal say in realistically having some kind of 'point' where it should be okay. If she never wants to have sex with you, that is perfecrly fine. It's her body. But to expect you to stay in a sexless relationship, just waiting like an obedient dog as she stalls for time before randomly deciding "eh, I guess I'll try it now (when nothing has even fucking changed except the date) is not okay.

>>16917496
She's 21 turning 22 soon.
This is also a pretty unconventional relationship outside of the virgin part anyway because we met online and (for now) she lives around 500 miles away, we've only met in person two weekends in total.

I guess my dilemma here lies in that I really care about her and think she's so great, but not only do I feel like it progresses slowly since we can't just meet any time, but since she doesn't seem so comfortable with intimacy I feel like it could potentially take ages before she's ready.
I don't know how long I can be ok with not knowing when it will happen, but I don't want to leave her either. I've already decided I could live with the long distance thing for now, this is just an added layer that makes it more unsure.

>>16917537
Ughhhh.... anon I don't know how to tell you this but two things:

1) online dating usually gets you matched with mentally unstable people. Maybe Match dot com isn't so bad since I hear they ask so many questions and are a paid service, seems more professional and "long term" relationship orented, but I dunno. All these other online dating venues? Nothing but crazies. I've had relationships and flings with over a dozen girls off websites. I'm generalizing from my own anecdotal evidence but after being with over a dozen, it really seems to attract mentally unstable people who aren't ready/not willing to learn how to have a relationship.

2) I'm also in the military, so I have experience with long distance relationships as well. These only ever work if you knew the person before you left, and even then, not often. This isn't just my experience - anyone in the military can tell you the same. This is just part and parcel of being in the service.

A long distance relationship with someone you met online? I'm telling you this for your own good, not to make you feel bad: It's probably not going to work out, and that isn't your fault.

I hope it does work out but hope for the best, expect the worst.

>>16917537
Sounds pretty fishy. Unless you're honestly willing to uproot yourself to the other end of the country / a different country, this is just going to be years of torture before you ragequit.

I understand you like her and hey, a real life virgin, a fucking unicorn, you don't want to miss that. But having wasted my entire youth on a string of ldrs that always went nowhere I have to speak against this kind of thing.

>>16917596
Bro. Do you live in Europe? 500 miles is not the other side of the country in America. It's isn't that far, but definitely too far for a proper relationship to be held.

>and hey, a real life virgin, a fucking unicorn, you don't want to miss that.

Are you fucking serious. I hate people that talk like you. What the fuck. Pussy on a pedastal. You can't even feel a difference. I've slept with three virgins and sex with virgins sucks. They don't move, they aren't confident, they don't even position themselves attractively, they have no clue how to react -- they just fucking exist there as it happens. Virgins are the worst sex you will have. I promise. I fucking promise.

You kids make it seem like a woman is worthless if she's not a virgin but if any of you ever got laid you'd get a headache the moment you hear a girl tell you she's a virgin.

>>16917581
1) It wasn't through Match, and I think I get what you're saying, but she was mainly looking for a friend in a new country not a relationship, but when we talked it went that way anyway.
She's not mentally unstable but she is unusual in that she's not really too crazy about boys, she is very picky.

2) Right, I'm def caution about this long distant long.

I should probably explain this further before I continue here, she's from america and hates it, she's on exchange in the country next to mine but in actuality she wants to be in my country, with or without me this was always her plan.
After the summer she finishes college in the states, then at the next summer she will study long term in my country with the ambition to live there.

So yeah, it's long distance but it's not like an indefinite and difficult situation to work out I don't feel. I'm thinking if I still feel good about this when she goes back for almost a year, I could survive doing skype video chats and one, or two visits until she relocates here for good.

Honestly though thanks for your input, you've def got me thinking a lot more critically about this, I think I needed to hear this.

>>16917596
I addressed this in my last reply a bit, but she is staying 500 miles away until after this summer, then she's gone until next may, after that she would be moving to my country.
The good thing about this is that it's not an indefinite wait for someone being ready to make a big move, she def was going here before I was even in the picture which is great. I knew of this premise before it got serious between us and it was def what made me stay, I wouldn't have gone for any other kind of long distance thing however strongly I felt.

Were any of your ldrs like this at all? Maybe it's just wishful thinking from my side here but I really feel like this situation for being ldr and meeting online is a lot better than the average.

Tell her you love her