wat do
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
>be newly 25
>Girl I like is 19 almost 20
We've been friends for a few months, she knows I like her, and I think she likes me. I believe she doesn't want to be my girlfriend or even take a chance is because of my age.
I've never been in this situation. I'm curious.
How can I get her to ignore my age and possibly date me? We get along wonderfully but I think she's just a little intimidated by it, which is silly to me.
Also no I'm not a sperg in the slightest.
Pls /adv/ wat do?
Shameless bump
>>16896632
Probe and find out what the feels are. You "believe"? Find out for sure. I don't think the age thing is a big deal.
>>16897028
Let's assume that it is.. then what?
Is it worth it to try and just warm up to her and form a more trusting relationship or just bail out altogether?
>>16897065
and by that I mean is there some way to work around it? or is it just one of those things I have to deal with and move on?
I get the feeling that it's such a simple roadblock it's got to have a simple solution to it.
That age difference is ideal though, I aim 5 years down
>>16897084
I agree, I don't think that gap is too far off on the maturity meter, especially in my situation.
you being 5 years older at this age is like the least big deal age gap possible really. when i was 18-20, i had no qualms dating guys your age and older. the thing about (teen) girls maturing faster than teen guys is true so while that evens out around your age, younger than 25 a modestly older boy likely has a better shot than one her exact same age.
IF she is interested in you, i doubt your age would turn her off unless shes an unusually rigid girl about things like that. (and as you get older you will learn acting based on fear of a statistical improbability isnt what winners do. as long as you are respectful you should never be afraid of the possibility of rejection.)
so my advice is just approach her if you feel that the friendship/chemistry are right. i would say statistically, if she likes you, her age is more likely to intimidate her in the sense that young girls tend to get insecure about very small things and she may worry she is too young for you/to compete with those worldly girls who can visit bars and do things she cant do (may sound silly but young womens minds are often full of self critical catastrophizations like this.) Young women often dont have the confidence to enjoy uncertainty. In this case she would seem somewhat shy and intimidated but would be warm and delighted to know your interest is mutual.
So get out there, envision success, but know that every winner has more failures than wins. Its all about hanging in there for the wins and making them big rather than hiding from failure like many folks do. So dont worry so much about her answer or being able to predict how interested she is in your first. When you get older you will realize thats not only a waste of time, but is sabotaging yourself by fostering rather than combating insecurity. What you do when you ask someone out is dont worry about that one womans answer - pat yourself on the back knowing youre taking the approach and path thatll lead you to more yeses than you could need
Yeah it's maybe not about your age, the gap is well within normal range.
>>16897158
That is amazing advice, thank you very much!
Those are the ages my husband and I started dating. I'm 25 now and he's 30. Just give her time.
>>16897216
Thank you for the advice!
