I'm going to try and make this a straight-forward as possible:
>Relationship of 4 years
>Swallowed some type of pill and realized me and my gf is sort of an emotional scumbag
>She doesn't do hardly any chores
>Fellatio/Cunnilingus ratio is sadly about 20/80
>Realize we are 100% in a codependent relationship
>tfw I lost a bunch of weight and she didn't
>tfw she's the low energy sex partner
>she can't handle any constructive criticism but she dishes it out frequently
>tfw I can't advance career or relationships outside of her because she always wants to do something with me.
>Says she will do anything to help me and often doesn't. Not intentionally, she's just not very helpful.
I could give you 100 more of these. I know what you're thinking "Just leave, dude".
Ok, but here's the thing. I've been trying to practice talking to other women (not to cheat, to prepare myself for the aftermath if I do gather the courage) and I truly suck. My social anxiety used to be crippling as a teenager, but after working jobs, getting laid, and knowing someone intimately for years, I have to potential to be a more outgoing person.
PS - She's the type to immediately start threatening her own life/ get revenge on me. How do I go about leaving her abruptly without her doing anything drastic?
My question is what can I do to prepare myself for a breakup? How do I get better at talking to people? I honestly just want to do a dry run and see if I could get another girl to want to fuck me, but I have no idea how to go about it. About any of this.
You talk like you already made up your mind. And how would you practice talking to people? Thats right. You already know.
>>16895304
I haven't. I keep reverting back to sunken cost fallacy when I get close to ending it. I've been trying to leave for 9 months. I was ready to do it and then she plans a nonrefundable trip and pays for most of my stuff guaranteeing we stay together at least a few more months. She has to know, right? Is this her trying to keep me around?
>>16895284
From the sounds of your whiny little post here I'm guessing she's totally normal and you're just an asshole yourself. 'Practicing talking to other women for the aftermath' get the fuck outta here with that shit mang. Leave the poor bitch at least so she can go fuck some alphas before settling down. You're the one just wasting her time at this point leading her on after 4 damn years.
Admitting you're being an asshole about this and leaving her now can help lead the way to solving your social retardation too.
>>16895346
I'm not going to talk shit because you don't know my life, but you have no clue:
I wasn't an asshole the first two years with her and it didn't go my way at all. She actually started fucking more once I started not caring about her. And treating her just shitty enough to where it's not obvious has become my specialty. If she doesn't like assholes, she should stop rewarding my asshole behavior. The years I would've done anything for her, she walked all over me, she abused me, she turned my every insecurity against me. I was her prisoner for the first half of the relationship. For fucks sake, she used to hit me and no one including her family or mine cared. I'm tired of people making her out to be the victim. That's what she does whenever I say she's treating me bad. That's what she does literally every time she loses an argument. She just launches into a bunch of excuses as to why her failures aren't her fault. Above all else, I'm tired of her fucking excuses.
Funny. My friends that gave me the "just do it, you're being mean" speech are all friends that are dating girls that are wrong for them and they've all been in relationships less than two years. One of them has literally been cheated on by two gfs in a row. Why would I ever take advice from people that don't have what I want?
I am ignoring all advice that demands I be a "nice guy". My gf killed all the nice guy tendencies in me.
So, I can't tell if you actually want to break up or not from all the things you've said to people who are trying to tell you.
But to answer the "'my question is" part, you can't really ever "prepare" for a break up, you just have to do it.
To get better at talking to people, you just kind of have to do it.
You know what you have to do, if it helps you can try mental exercises? Plan out what you want to say, say it in your head over and over again until uou feel confident enough to do it.
Same thing with talking to new people.
Are you really that afraid to be alone that you're going to drag her along? Grow some fucking balls and dump her. Jesus Christ you don't need to go directly from one girl to the next. You are pathetic
>>16895509
I never thought of it like that. I get in moods where I think if I leave her I'll die alone. 1. That's not necessarily true 2. Whether or not I stay with her has little bearing on if I die alone or not.
I know it seems like I'm stringing her along, but everytime I try to hint at anything close to breaking up, she goes full on nuclear and I truly have no defense against this. She has tried every trick to get me to stay, but I end up hating myself a month later. Like what if she starts saying she'll hurt herself or she'll say I hurt her. You guys keep telling me to nut up and I want to, but everytime I try she plays games with me.
I'm sorry if I'm coming off like a douche, I'm just really tired. I feel like I'm repeating the same dream. Not a good dream or a bad one. Just a disappointing, confusing dream that I can never seem to wake up from. I feel like the "you're being an asshole" and "yeah dude Fuck her" voices are alternating with in me.
I should get off 4chan and get actual counseling for this, maybe
>>16895829
Good idea. Also if she does hurt herself not your responsibility most you can do is call the loony bin on her if she threatens herself and thats all you really should do. Run man as fast as you can.
