Junior psychiatrist here, will answer questions.
Prefer to answer questions in regards to mental illness, general medicine, or advice on becoming a doctor, but I'm not super picky
>>16893541
How'd you fail out of STEM and decide on pseudoscience?
>>16893547
Not OP, but psychiatrists are physicians. You are thinking of psychologists.
>What's the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist?
>One is licensed to treat the patient.
I'm not sure if my brother is a sociopath or not. He's very clever, manipulates words in arguments, and I'm always the one at blame.
For example: We recently bought some pot, which we split the cost evenly for, and he told me "I'm taking 3 grams and you can have 2 since you smoke less." I tried to rationalize how that isn't fair, he kept saying it doesn't matter, that he picked it up, found the dealer first, blah blah blah, and this goes all the way back to, "you owe me because I use to let u smoke my stuff 5 years ago". He'll say other stuff to try and convince me that the deal is fair and make me sound like a shitty person. He does this with everything.
Another would be him approaching me while I'm studying on weekdays and persistently bothering me about going somewhere or doing something outside for hours. If I say no, he'll continue to bother me until he tells me how other brothers are better than me, how I spend isn't very wise and that I should be focusing more on the present. Then he makes remarks about himself and how he'll leave me alone and be a good brother, never bother me again. Bullshit like that.
Idk what to do or how to combat his ego effectively while still maintaining a good relationship with him.
Do I have something clinically wrong with me or do I just have shitty habits? I try the self improvement thing but I always inevitably succumb to despair and give up. I'll start some new initiative, graduallt lose track, and then just give up entirely, after which point it seems to me that I may as well commit suicide since I'm too incompetent to manage my life and I'm going to be stuck alone working the same job until I die, and if that's the case I'd rather die now.
I'm starting undergrad this fall at age 21.
I plan on majoring in the classics/western civ while doing pre-med. Statistics indicate that humanities majors get into med school a higher % of the time than bio and chem majors. I've also been told (in the context of readying myself for med school) that I should major in what I'm most interested and talented in. Is this solid advice?
As for extracurriculars, I'm thinking instead of piddling with bullshit clubs/councils/meetings/student govt, that I'll exercise, play billiards, get involved in some studies (research), and relax in my free time, and go to countries with understaffed hospitals and looser healthcare regulations in the summers to volunteer and get hands on experience with patients.
Thoughts?
>OP is actually a troll and he is not coming back
It's been an hour and 50 minutes kek
I've been on the verge of suicide the last 3 months
I hate my job
I can't move because of my army reserve unit
I don't know what I want to do
I have 2 friends and I hate both of them because they're dicks to me
My work friends are dicks, but most people I work with are just fucking retarded druggies
I have a crush on and had a fling with some druggie at work and I hate that I like him
Can i kill myself
>>16893551
>One is licensed to force drugs on every patient they see
Why do I keep performing concerts if it just reminds me how my dad is dead? I see his face in the audience every time, the music gets emotional, and I cry that night every time. So why do I do it if it makes me feel like shit?
>>16893668
This desu. In my experience, therapists have provided meaningful, concrete solutions to my issues while psychiatrists have suggested the use of drugs that 1) dont actually solve the root of the issue but mitigate symptoms 2) are dangerous to health 3) can cause long term/permanent side effects like memory loss, increased anxiety 4) aren't necessary for every patient but are prescribed almost indiscriminately
>>16893547
Lol. I never even tried. I was a combat medic in the army. Fell in love with medicine when I was in Iraq. Then got a degree in cell biology and neuroscience
>>16893617
You sound like how most people feel. Set smaller goals. Try different things. Find something to fall in love with and go with that
>>16893632
OP here. I would say that you should get a degree in what you have talent and interest in. I go to a school well known for appreciating well rounded student doctors, and it really does pay off.
Just take all of you science classes like you will settle for nothing less than an A.
As for extracurriculars, as long as you are doing something interesting, you really can't go wrong. Gaming and partying are not interesting hobbies for doctors.
Learn to play an instrument.
>>16893639
Sorry, eating dinner
>>16893657
No. All these problems have solutions.
>>16893821
I'm a medic too tho man
I've never been deployed so honestly joining the Army reserve and now being tethered here cause of it was all a waste
I had drill this last weekend and I thought of talking to like someone there but I was kind of happy at drill, but when I went home Sunday night my hatred of my life came back
>>16893740
OP here. Try not to judge psychiatry. We treat schizophrenics, severe bipolar a, people that, without meds, cannot survive in the world. If you come to a psychiatrist not expecting a chemical solution, you've come to the wrong place.
>>16893541
How do you decided how can get antidepressants?
>>16893824
You sound like me, anon.
Just give your number out to people in your platoon. Don't be shy. We're all friends
How do I help the bf realize life can still be fun and enjoyable even without smoking weed daily?
>>16893832
Thanks for a great question, anon.
There are tests that we can do that have proven sensitivity and specificity for depression.
But really, it comes down to the patient. If we think that you would benefit, we will prescribe it. If we think that you will ignore all of our other advice, like exercise and sleep hygiene and cognitive behavioral therapy, we will prescribe it.
Lots of people think we are pill slinging pillars of the establishment, but really we are specialists in a needed field who will try to help a patient with the methods we are comfortable
>>16893840
You could try to find out why he smokes pot all day. But it's a drug that is tough to get people to abstain from
>>16893864
Well he just doesn't really have motivation (that was a thing before the smoking). Doesn't know what he wants for a career, doesn't have many friends. But I mean, those same two things apply to me as well. I think it comes down to the fact that he just doesn't seem to enjoy life very much when he's sober
>>16893541
my treating psychiatrist i have been seeing for over a year has given me a general diagnosis for a psychotic disorder, why would he not be specific?
Did you go to med school knowing that you wanted to become a psychiatrist, or is that something you decided after? Why did you settle on psychiatry?
>>16893907
Question of the night anon.
Giving someone a very specific psych diagnosis has its pitfalls. It bottlenecks you into a specific treatment regimen, which is kind of intellectually lazy, and dangerous, as that whoever you see next may look at you as a diagnosis more than a person.
Simply put, it is psychiatrists objection to putting you into a box, like the psychologists want to do to make up for their lack of scientific evidence
>>16893897
So you wish he was happier being sober?
>>16893938
Yeah!
>>16893939
So it sounds like part of it is him and part of it is the fact he is saturated with pot. Have you talked to him about your concern?
>>16893966
Yeah, I've told him before that I worry about how often he smokes. He's even said that he wishes he liked sober life more. I suggested that he try a regimen where he doesn't smoke quite as much, not so frequently that he doesn't get side effects when he runs out of weed. He seemed to like that idea, but then he never stuck with it.
Sometimes I get thoughts or feelings in my head that I can't explain with words, and I can't get off them. It makes me feel anxious and broken.
Ive broken off with a girl (male here) cause i felt she was weak and was using me for what i had to offer. I made her go through some emotional shit as everytime i see her she is has no emotional and face is dark (prob from looking down due to sadness). I think i was her one very close friend, she even cried to me before.
I know what i did was wrong and am an asshole but ultimately i just couldnt put up with her anymore. I broke it with her (as a friend) just after a 2 week winter break when she msged me and seemed super excited to have me back to school.
Since this break i feel horrible, i call myself "asshole" or "you were wrong(referring to me), or something along those terms. I try to make it up now to her by being as nice as i can and never ignoring her requests anymore, always try to help her when i can. Even so u constantly feel like a huge asshole and especially pitiful for myself when i see her, reminding myself of my wrong doings. This is affecting my school work and my "positively" and also humbled me greatly. I have apologised numerous times since then, in person and also online.
How can i stop this horrible feeling of knowing i hurt another being. I don't want to be an asshole and ruin someones life by making them depressed. I really dont know what to do.
Thank you
short of taking medicine, what can I do to get rid of postpartum depression?
>>16894120
There are tons of groups out there. Unless you are in the middle of nowhere you should have plenty of options.
The biggest thing is understanding how normal postpartum depression is, and to have good support mechanisms, and to know when to ask for help
I often recall times in the past when someone made me feel humiliated, and keep going over it trying to defend myself but they just laugh at me, to the point where it's a false memory and they continue making fun of me for things that they hadn't actually said in real life. Like I actually think about fictional instances of people making fun of me. What causes this and how can I stop?
>>16894148
Fuck, I get stressed out and wrapped up in imaginary conversations like that all the time
I serve social anxiety disorder and are listed through the Canadian government as having a disability. I also have a memory issue and really bad deadly allergies. I always forget to take my medication and I can not leave my house by myself. Do you know if I be able to get a service dog? I hate being so dependant on people. I also allergic to dogs so have to be hypoallergenic.
>>16894158
I have a severe *
>>16894148
As an example, I was doing this at work once when I was moving shit, and I just lightly bumped into something, and the person I was thinking about started telling me I was stupid for bumping into stuff.
>>16894152
It sucks right? When's the earliest you remember it happening? I think I was 11 or 12.
I get serious feelings to cut people open or grab a gun kill my family then myself for no reason. Other times when im helping my dad with dinner and i have a knife for cooking i have such an urge to sink it into him. Wat do?
>>16894158
I'm not sure how the Canadian government works, so I equate it toe the VA we have in the states. A service animal is definitely something you should look into
>>16894179
Jesus dude. You shouldn't be on 4chan looking for advice.
We all have urges that make no sense. The important thing is that we see them as urges with no logical backing and dismiss them
I'm addicted to the internet, waste a lot of time on it and now I have a ton of work to do for uni that I'm behind on and am sleep-deprived
How do I go online less when I have nothing else to fill my time?
And if I do how can I at least not stay online till the end of the day
>>16895054
Not op but waiting for my reply so ill help here cause i have the same problem.
Stay away from computer until your work away from internet is done. Even go somewhere where there is no personal internet like library. Leave ur phone at home. ultimately it depends on you, ive read many posts about quiting internet but if you are too mentally weak to do it, watever you read and watever i write is meaningless
>>16893541
Is it true that when people often say that they are not insane it is actually a telltale sign that they are?
Disregard my last post. I suck cocks.
I want to date an asexual. Is that possible?
>>16895114
Yes. It's just like taking out a girl that firendzoned you. You'll spend money and won't get laid. The question is, why would you do that?
I watched a bunch of Charles Barkley videos on youtube, and want to know if his stance on ADHD (or ADD, or both) really is an emotional/inhibition/motivation disorder
>>16895103
more the reverse. people who claim to be crazy in some way or another tend not to be
>>16893541
is it insane in the membrane?
>>16895993
*Russell, not Charles
I'm a hikki, 100% shut-in. Don't dare to go outside at all. Can't work or do anything basically.
Where do I start, to get better? If I could just leave, I would, but I get panic attacks as soon as I get close to the outer door.
What was the hardest part about becoming a psychiatrist for you?
Was there a lot of math involved?
>not sure if I want to go into clinical psychology, neuropsychology or psychiatry
>I'm dyscalculic
>>16894251
Alright thank you Anon
>>16894148
OP here. What you describe is what we call ruminating, like animals who regurgitate their food and chew on it, which I think is a pretty brilliant metaphor for the mental exercises we do.
The best recommendation, instead of thinking about what happened and fantasizing about all the ways that you could have done things differently to turn the situation into something more favorable to you, is to spend that mental time and energy trying to understand WHY you are ruminating on these events. What is it that bothers you about them? It sounds like you are mentally practicing standing up for yourself. If you can understand your motivation, you will have the solution
>>16895054
OP here.
A university student that lacks discipline, you say? How rare and interesting!
I kid for a reason. This is a super common problem. You are entering adulthood and part of it is learning how to set goals and limits, and learning to achieve these things.
Just think of how parents set limits, and do that.
1. No internet past ten
2. You have to have all of tomorrow's work done before you can good around on the Internet
3. If you use the Internet to take a break from studying, set a timer for ten or twenty minutes, and actually stick to it
Bad habits are systems of reward that we abuse to the point that it's no longer rewarding. Write that sentence down on a sticky, put it on your monitor.
>>16895114
OP here.
Fascinating question.
You have to tell me more.
What is it about dating an asexual that you think would be more rewarding?
>>16895993
Not familiar with the guy, but I will look into it. But yes, people with ADHD often have depressed (inhibited) prefrontal cortex, which is the part of the brain that tells the other parts of your brain to calm the fuck down. So the inhibiting part of your brain is less active, which is counterintuitive to most people, and which is why giving stimulants is so effective in treating ADHD
>>16896015
In undergrad there is quite a bit of math. Very little math is involved in medical school. In psychiatry you deal very little in math besides some statistics, unless you go into research. Psych research is very math intense, as we use MRI technology, which is super goddamn confusing
Hope you are still here,
I have requested to see a student psychologist. But i don't know if my thing is serious enough i feel like a pussy for doing it tbqh
let me express in short what i said: I expected more from my uni life and i feel unhappy because of that, i have trouble dealing with my emotions and i usually just stack into each other. So my mood is really random sometimes i just sit at home being really sad and next day i'm fine. And a note i'm a man but i feel like i act like a dramatic woman.
All because of some girl i dated for a while i really liked her but after a while she said she had a crush on someone else. This was my only experience with a girl and i didn't even fuck her 22 virgin. Later i found out that months later she is officialy in a relationship with this other dude. It made me feel worthless, i feel like my lack of experience ruined my chance with a relationship with her and i'm sad about that.
If i would read this from a other person point of view the answer would be 'man up' but i just don't know. I'm confused about what i want. Do i just want to have sex with a girl for once and be the one night stand kind of guy or do i actually want a relationship.
>>16893541
Is there hope for BPD? I get so mad and sad on the inside it feels like I am going to throw up. About to lose another relationship I'm going to throw myself in front of a car..just dont get this curse, man. Also abruptly stopped meds and doc doesnt want to raise dosage because toxic and hypomania
I think he suspects some suicidal thoughts. Am I at risk for involuntary commitment if I keep this up or on what base can he do that?
How does one deal with low self-esteem ?
One part of my head wants to be more open and to talk a bit more with my friends, think that after all I may be interesting, but just after I'm paralysed by fear and anxiety.
I'm unemployed, broke, balding, living with my parents, about to turn 30, friendless and depressed. Should I commit sudoku?
OP gone?
>>16896383
Find one thing you like about yourself and latch onto it. I realized that I was a funny guy, when I had been out with friends all day and making them laugh, then when a depressive episode came on they were all noting how quiet I was being, how boring it was, etc.
There is something within you that is great, promise, and if you find it, latch onto it, and you can work from there.
i failed uni entry exam 2 times and im 22. all my peers are going on about their lives and im fucking stuck between high school and the next step on my life. how to stop being a pathetic disgusting mediocre failure piece of shit?
>>16893541
How much would supplementary testosterone improve cognitive function and mood in a male with low test? Have you ever given anyone test before?
>>16896433
I bounce in and out. This is my distraction during work breaks
Sever anxiety, depression and Driving PTSD
What do?
>>16896345
Involuntary commitment factors depend hugely on where you live. Here in the states, you have to be of direct harm to self or others, which is a tough thing to determine.
Most people with BPD who do commit suicide do so on accident, as suicidal gestures is one of their many and challenging symptoms.
Is there hope? Totally, my own mother is moderately borderline. She has read books on it, and has worked on her relationships.
So my advice: read several books about it. Read enough books that you feel like you could write one yourself. And get in counseling,m. That's your best bet. To have a therapeutic alliance with someone that can help you change your cognitive and emotional patterns into something healthy.
Good luck, man. It's a lot of work, but you have your entire lifetime to look forward to.
>>16896628
OP here, it's not uncommon that low testosterone can cause mood symptoms. After ruling out other more common organic causes of depression, and barring any contraindications, it is something we can administer.
Do you have low T, or are you depressed, or are you just looking to juice and need an excuse?
How can I stop agoraphobia?
This started without a reason and because of this I don't have friends or anyone that I could talk to.
When I go outside I start thinking what will happen on that walk.
I'm on antidepressants that aren't doing anything to me.
>>16897430
agoraphobia needs therapy. meds have very little efficacy
>>16897579
What kind of therapy?
Is it normal to have thoughts to do self-destructive acts for no reason? Like wanting to drive into incoming traffic, jump off a bridge, shit my pants or kill a baby? I get these thoughts like these every day but I obviously never follow through with them.
>>16897588
I'm not sure what type of therapy has shown to work best, but I would imagine cognitive behavioral therapy would be a good choice
>>16897621
It's normal. It's kind of a little remnant from our lizard brain days. Don't give it much thought
>>16898108
Thanks
Only recently got my bipolar disorder (type 1) under control with medication. Now, I realize that my disorder led me to believe that I'm not who I really am. It affected everything - my confidence, my self-esteem, my self-image, and even my hobbies and interests.
Now that I'm stabilized, how can I get a real idea of who I am? Of what I'm capable or not capable of? Of my shortcomings, as well as my talents?
I was just told I have an "increased psychotic vulnerability". I know what it means, but how and where do I learn more about it? How do I prevent a full-blown psychotic episode from occurring sometime in the future? Other diagnoses include bpd and recurrent severe depression.
>>16893541
Where can I learn how to be a successful communicator in a relationship? I'm a very analytical, logical, no bullshit kind of guy. This apparently comes across as "mean" and "demeaning."
I would like to learn how to communicate my logical points while also making the other person feel more at ease.
>>16893541
So my psychiatrist diagnosed me with cyclothymia and prescribed me Espran. I have been taking for 3 weeks now. And last week I experience memory loss (at the cashier i completely forgot my card's password, I think its strange because i always use it).
And i have been feeling this "not" in my throat, out of breath and anxious.
Should i just wait more so the medicine takes effect or its no good?
I'll be seeing my psych on the 23rtd
Thanks.
>>16899057 pls respond to this. I am also want this respons
Can somebodt please help me here? It's thread-related
>>16899176
>>16893541
I live in an all black neighborhood with my white husband my white baby and my white self. There is a group of older neighbors that "hang out" and drink and smoke most of the time outside the apartments. They all love my husband and tell him how "black" he seems and what not, but they are really rude to me. Never a nice normal thing to say and they like to make comments about how I am "not cool" or whatever and little jabs about my looks (like how I don't have weave or a giant ass).
Whats the psychology behind this and how do I stop this behavior?
>>16899234
What's the matter roastie, can't handle the toasting from the roasting?
>>16899149
OP here, a more PC term for psychotic vulnerability is borderline personality disorder (BPD). That's actually what it means, borderline psychotic. So under stress of various forms you are more prone to delusions and other psychotic features
>>16899057
OP here, I don't really know what you want me to say. Go live your life. Your answers will come
How do I stop feeling insecure about my 6.5 inch dick? It's precisely the average in my country, and that sucks because there's a 50% chance with every girl I fuck that her ex was bigger than me.
How would you help me to deal with my existential crisis?
Short summary: Depression started after being dumped in a bit of a shitty way by the only girl I've ever felt able to reveal the 'real me' to. Spent a year trying to work out what had happened and why. Eventually realised she's not a bad person at all, she's just trying to navigate her way through a difficult life like the rest of us. I let go of my anger, and it got replaced with nothing. I've been able to really enjoy anything for about 3 years, because I find it all meaningless. I don't believe in eternal love or soulmates or things like that, but I wish I did because I think you need to in order to have a happy relationship. I don't believe in God, but I wish I did because it would be much more comforting if I felt I was a part of his plan. Every time I try to give my life meaning, it just falls apart because everything seems futile in the long run - whether I live my life trying to benefit others or live a life solely for my own pleasure, I can't connect to the enjoyment of it, and will end up dead anyway. I know that CBT involves challenging unrealistic thoughts, but I don't think these are unrealistic - definitely mentally damaging, but unfortunately the reality.
Hopefully that gives you a bit of an insight. To sum it up in just one sentence, I think that people need to construct and live by a series of lies in order to live a happy life, and now that I've accepted that they are lies, I can't reconnect to happiness. What do?
>>16896288
So basically the only way to deal with ADHD is to provide constant chemical stimulation so you're not starved for it, and can thus function like an average person? Is there any alternative to medication that can help? I tried it as a kid, and have been hesitant to try it since.
How do you know if you have a normal/healthy mind?
>>16899163
Your girlfriend hates how you argue, eh anon? I was the same way, I blamed it on the fact I did speech and debate in high school, but really, it's just how my personality was back then: not emotionally open or invested in the person I was with, just kind of going through the motions of a relationship because I liked having sex on a regular basis.
Maybe you identify with some of that, maybe you don't. But if you really want to change, you have to be able to understand what your gf is saying when she is communicating with you, which means you have to empathize, which means you have to really care, and really be present, which is easy to do when you are first falling for a girl. But is tough when things have gotten stale and now you are fighting about some shit.
But I can guarantee that if you start fighting and communicating with your heart more, you'll fight less.
Women, they need love, and love comes in all the ways.
>>16899175
OP here
Stick it it some more. Side effects tend to last for up to two months after starting a medication.
Interestingly, there tend to be two different sets of side effects. The first happens after the first couple doses, and lasts a couple weeks, which is the effect of having the drug building up in your blood. The second set occurs at about two weeks and can last up to two months, which is your brains neural adaptation to the drugs.
>>16899234
OP here
I'm just gonna shoot straight with you, I'm a bit of a racist. So that's gonna be sprinkled into my answer.
It could simply be that they are trying to make your husband feel like he doesn't have to worry about them trying to get you in bed. I regularly tease my friends ladies just to set the stage that I'm not interested. So it could be something as simple as that, but it's always hard to tell when you're dealing with those monkeys. It's like trying to understand why a dog bites. I'm a psychiatrist, not the goddamn monkey whisperer
>>16901055
OP here. You don't. You will always feel like it isn't enough. This is simply part of life. Death and taxes and inadequacy about your dick size: laws of the universe
>>16901093
OP here. I actually had a conversation during my interviews that was all about people like you: people who struggle with their connection in the world. Its a shame that religion isn't such a central force today than it used to be. It gave people meaning and perspective. Science tries to tell you that this universe is cold and indifferent to you. You were an accident and are inconsequential. It's a shame we had to toss religion out because all the magical shit, because the non magic is worth keeping around.
My advice: look up 'do you do it or does it do you' by watts. You can buy the audio CDs or maybe even download it at this point, it got me over the same struggles.
>>16901119
It's what you do when no one is watching.
If you aren't sick enough to stand out in society, you are obviously pretty healthy mental health wise, you aren't standing in the streets yelling at the CIA to stop transmitting thoughts into your head.
But then there are the hidden crazy people. Those are my favorite. The ones that masterbate to captain crunch commercials they recorded onto VHS tapes. Those are the really interesting ones in psychiatry
OP here. This is probably it for my night. So if you post something tonight check back tomorrow.
>>16901552
Alright, fair enough.
>>16893541
The girl I've started seeing is very self destructive. She suffers from ptsd, due to s very traumatic event that resulted in the death of several family members. She has several bruises on her body, which she tels me are just the result of her clumsiness. She also has burned her self with cigarettes in the past. She always looks tired recently, with several bags under her eyes. She doesn't seem to have many friends or a positive relationship with her parents. Around me she acts extremely happy and full of energy, and overall doesn't really want to discuss her problems with me. What can I do to support her other than just being nice?
>>16893541
I think depression is causing me issues? I was diagnosed before with psychotic depression. After min orly traumatic events I lost all my energy. I don't feel sad just off. I take adderall I can try at things I can get some stuff done mostly at work. I used to be a clean freak now I barely clean. I don't sleep well. Either not at all or for days.
I cannot keep friends. I just stop talking to people. I feel overwhelmed at nothing and stop replying. I avoid going in public most of the time. Sometimes I'll have a night where I feel so restless with always being home that I go out. I usually talk to tons of people and I do have good social skills but it's normally overwhelming to go out. I hear people whispering my name a lot (I know it's not real but it feels real and makes me think I'm the butt of every joke and constantly being mocked).
I haven't dated in 2 years I just don't feel attached to people.
I'm on adderall but I've had that for a long time this thing only started 2 years ago. I used to smoke weed and don't anymore. I was thinking maybe wellbutrin would help? I don't know I just want to have energy and feel connected to people again
>>16902602
OP here. It sounds like you are happy with her and she is happy with you, what aspect of your relationship are you unhappy with?
>>16902727
OP here, I think starting an antidepressant would be a great idea. Wellbutrin isn't a bad option. It has less sexual side effects that SSRIs, with similar efficacy.
I failed 2 1/2 years of university with nothing in my hands.
I know I can study, if I want and I know I'm intelligent, but as things seem the end of the road is pretty clear...
Self - esteem is low a shit and I just hate myself.
>>16893541
Have a big one: my now-ex GF called for a break-up, with one factor being that she has a cocktail of mental illnesses that she's only now going to take care of (depression, BPD, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts for sure), with the other being that she's a self-described perfectionist when it comes to memorization, as my sparse habit of re-affirming or asking about things I forgot causes a meltdown, though mostly whenever she's already bordering on erupting from 20 other things in her daily life that keep her in what feels like a 24/7 anxiety-fueled state
What I'm wondering is in the 5 years we were dating, her agitation towards that stemming from "not caring about her" is a completely new thing that I've only just started observing, along with various displays of rage whenever something hit her breaking point: something small (yet unintentional) thing I was did, or me happening to be the closest thing around to vent at. It's been a thing ever since she moved out of state (and back) while witnessing one of her best friends absolutely assfucking her as far as a healthy home life went the entire time
The armchair shrink in me wants to believe that her head was completely nuked the two years she was away, as her friend was the shittiest mentally-draining roommate ever, and her girlfriend liked to fuck with her just because. Is it too much to assume that being stuck in that scenario where absolutely no one gives a shit could do some major damage in the area of how people perceive/absorb you?
She plans to jump onto meds the moment she can get them, and while I plan to give it time, I'm wondering if I should even try to assume therapy will fix this and/or make salvage attempts, given what I think are factors. Since I expected to spend the rest of my life with her, other opinions before severing 100% would help, because with her state, and a major part of my future gone, I don't see anything other than awkward stress and fake emotions from a forced friendship
OP?
>>16900809
Terrible, lazy advice. Shame on you.
>>16899057
Hi, I was diagnosed with schizoaffective and had a very similar experience once I was stabilized, as well as the fact that I underwent significant amount of depersonalization beforehand and some severe memory loss that I've been gradually gaining back. What helped me was writing down my thoughts on the matter, and actively trying to recall what life was like before it all went to hell- which wasn't easy and took a long time, but it was better than laying around and waiting for something to happen. I had interests in engineering when I was a child, as an example, and now I'm re-pursuing those interests- despite my circumstances being significantly different and there being no chances of living the dream I had when I was a kid in the same way I imagined it. I spent 4-5 years of my life experiencing mood swings without knowing what they were (or that I was even having them) and eventually breaking down from multiple psychotic episodes which left me totally numb and eventually hospitalized after the visions became unbearable and I was suicidal (and learned about bipolar and schizoaffective). The key to my recovery, along with the medication (which was essential for me, as it both stopped the visions and lifted me up out of depression), was reminding myself of what I used to enjoy before I lost interest in everything, and not just going back to old coping mechanisms I used during the mood swings (wandering, drinking, self-pity, drugs), since those weren't really "me", they were just what I did to cope.
In short, try to write down as much as you can of what you remember about your life. Try to write it down as if you were explaining your life story to someone who had never met you before. I specifically did this to help with the memory problems, but it also helped with my self-esteem and sense of direction. Hell, I even ended up learning about my ancestors- something I never thought I would do.
>>16894106
It sounds like you're trying to make things right. Keep doing what you're doing, and try to forgive yourself.
I know people in the same situation as you who have handled things far worse. Be glad you aren't as selfish as them.
My happiness keeps going up and down. I'll be happy for a few days, hang out with friends, see people, and then be really down for a day or two. This generally happens after I've been very social or done a lot of activities. It seems that I just get too many things to process and my brain fries.
I'm diagnosed with PDD-NOS (mild form of autism) and heard that low-dose anti depressants could smooth this over. Should I see a doctor and get more info on this? It's covered by health care.
>>16896267
I was just about to ask you about a self-discipline question, but I see the answer is already here
I feel like I'm mentally a fucking mess. No one would be able to notice it if they just walked past me and I'm certain none of my family or even closest friends notice at all.
I guess I should go in the best sequential order I can but I feel many of the events and ideas are linked.
Dad left home when I was 12, never thought it was the biggest deal didn't really like him much (pretty sure he has some pretty hectic social problems himself). The relationship was weird though, he still came around every week and helped out around the house but he was never a parent. This lead to the fucked family life I have lived (and am still living) for the past 8 years. A mum who is only a parent maybe 30% of the time, an older sister who is the other 70% and then another older sister who is a manipulative, narcissistic, just generally not very nice person.
And then there's me, the youngest only male in the family. No father figure, no male at all in my family I guess I felt isolated so I turned to the internet to fill the void. Any question I had, anything I could really want was right there so I was kind of consumed by it. I was never antisocial or alienated in school or anything like that, natural good looks, a knack for being empathetic sort of smart and funny earned me the spot of the smart guy in the popular group (wooo). However, when I was 14 got a pretty bad case of acne for at least the until I was 17. Nothing changed socially was still in the same group of friends etc, but for me quite a lot changed. I knew people wouldn't really like to look at an acne ridden face so when I spoke to people I felt bad for them having to do that, caused me to feel embarrassed and blush as a result of that. Sounds quite simple but is really quite crippling, imagine every time someone talks to you general conversation, deep conversation, gossiping, questions, just anything my face would go red from that feeling. *continued in next post*
>>16899163
>>16901516
Not OP but I picked up a neat system for better communication you could use with your gf
Rephrase their ideas
Use their words
Check in with them
this system will make her feel at ease in any conversation
>>16902977
Still plagues me today sometimes when I talk to people my face will go red and I always avoid eye-contact I guess because of the "if I can't see them, the can't see me" sort of thing (always happens more often with girls than guys for whatever reason).
It doesn't really help that all of this was occurring to someone who lives in a house with three fucking females. The arguments, the constant bitching, just a bunch of petty shit that I really can't stand. Never really ever seen my mum happy, manipulative sister is always causing bullshit drama in order to get her own way and other sister is always over dramatising everything and throwing fucking fits over bullshit - they're just a fucking mess to live with fullstop.
All of this together sort of made me isolate myself. Staying out of everything at home managed to help not get involved as often so it just translated across my whole life I guess. Still have a few close really loyal friends but besides the occasional meet up and hang out/go out with them I pretty much live for myself.
This whole situation has ruined my what could have been a cool dating life. When all you deal with 80% of the day is crazy as fuck, annoying fucking females then it affects your whole perception of women. When you like a girl, take an interest in a girl there's (usually) always a thought in the back of your mind saying "wonder what it would be like to live with, stay with, be with her" and when your only encounter with that shit is what I've experienced then you typically run the other way.
This caused me (when I was actually trying to get girls) to never really commit. Texting was fine, even meeting up and talking was fine but I had no intention of taking her back to mine, or even bringing her into my life so to speak, because that means seeing/meeting/interacting with my family which was bad enough for me so why the fuck would I want someone I like and am generally looking out for to be put into that situation. *cont.*
>>16902996
Also I guess the fear of getting hurt which my family has done to me quite often, or abandoned sort of how my dad left an empty part in my life; made any sort of commitment pretty much as close to impossible as it gets for me. Was to scared of any of that shit happening to me or me doing that shit to people I'm interested in (unintentionally of course but the chance is there).
All of that together has made pretty much the past year and half literally a time where I haven't talked to one female with any intention of getting into a relationship. And I'm guessing because in the back of my mind I know it will never work I kind of subconsciously purposely go out of my way to I guess not create (or get the chance to create) these sorts of relationships.
So I'm lonely as fuck and with all this shit going on in my life have never had someone to vent to who generally cares about me and can actually 'love me' throughout all the shit.
*next part is conclusion I guess (there's more shit but this has already gone on 4x longer than I expected it to be so whatever)*
I'm from texas. I'm an infantilist, which I enjoy using diapers and acting like a baby.
To me, I feel like i really do the infantilist for feelings of love and security. But I cant deny that it gives me sexual feelings. I don't like it, but it's true. Is there any way a psychiatrist could help me get rid of such feelings?
>>16903007
And I guess this whole pretty pathetic sob story leads me to now.
Introverted as fuck only really look out for myself (and of course few close friends when they need). Never had a girlfriend and was waaaay closer to getting one when I was 14 and 15 compared to now (18 for reference). Push people away so pretty much given up on attempts of getting a girl friend, or just any new friends in general. And as a result of all of that just really, really, really fucking lonely and trapped in a situation that in all honesty (even being as objective as possible) is keeping me trapped in this situation.
The idea is that a degree (which I'm working on) will lead me to my own adult life which will get me out of this family shit and into a position where I can actually improve. But that's three years away and I don't know if I can take any more of this shit for another three years.
I know this has been a huge fucking essay, life story and I doubt anyone will respond because of that. And even if I get no replies at least I got to vent a shit load of these problems to an outlet of some sort. But to anyone who does, thanks a bunch in advance.
OP still here?
>>16903047
Just going to give you a little advice on the awkward/lonely part.
I used to be really awkward like you, I kinda just grew out of it. I felt like I was alone and didn't have anything at 18.
My face still turns red when I talk to people and I feel a little shy, but I decided not to care about it anymore. Girls tend to find it cute and guys don't really give a shit. I still get awkward sometimes and make a fool out of myself, but I laugh about it and see it in perspective, nobody really cares in the end.
I'm 23 now and only had 1 'long term' girlfriend and even that was only 8 months. I stopped caring as much though. Having a gf doesn't solve anything, having a lot of friends doesn't solve anything. You need to learn to love yourself and be ok with yourself. I know it sounds cliche as fuck but at the end of the day you'll be alone and stuck with the person you are. Embrace your awkward parts, your difficulties, get out there, try things, live life.
Just some random rambling but hope it helps a little.
>>16903079
Really well put man. My idea has always been to try improve myself and I'd like to say I have been lately. Actually putting effort into school for the first time in my life and have even been trying to learn a new language.
I guess it's just the fact I've never had a relationship like that before so my minds living in half the fantasy shit that movies/tv sell you, and only have in reality.
But yeah, I think I'm really just going to start doing what I want to do a lot more and stop caring about how what I'm doing fits in with what I think, everyone thinks I should be doing.
Can't wait until I can actually support myself and start living my life as my life. When that happens everything good or bad will (for the most part) be a result of what I'm doing so I can fix it or work at to make it better.
>>16893783
Then you can't be a psychiatrist.
You need to become a doctor, work in the field for two year then specialise. altogether taking 11 years. OP is a big fat phoney.
>Unless you've graduated from medicine already.
Oh and OP, this is when you decide to be a tripfag so others can tell who you are.
Sauce: first year med.
>>16893541
Can schizophrenia be faked?
I might be schizotypal, and when I was once tested by a clinician, the so called psychosis level was pretty high on the graphic, maybe over the average. Not sure as the doc took away the results and didnt say more than 'its pretty bad'.
>>16903952 (same anon)
Also, is your life over after you end up evrn for a short while in the mental Hospital? Does it forever appear on the medical records and you are pretty mucb fucked if you want to pursue a career?
How do I stop repressed memories from coming up? I want to undo what my last therapist did with EMDR therapy.h
>>16893794
This isn't very helpful advice. I don't know what I'm supposed to try. I'm not capable of meeting any goal that takes longer than a week before I will stop caring. My sentiments may be common, but regardless I believe I'm inferior to the average person. I wasn't able to complete post secondary education, and I don't think I will ever be able to. I have no social skill whatsoever. I'm stuck in some dead end job. Thinking realistically about my capabilities, I can't imagine how I would possibly improve my situation. Why shouldn't I just die, since that's all I have to look forward to? I dislike my life, and I see no purpose in continuing it for another 40 years, assuming I even live that long.
>>16893541
How do I learn to forgive myself? I spend almost all of my waking life regretting things in my past. I can't be happy for good friends because I'm just envious. I can't even read about successful people because I feel that I should be them.
I just can't let go of these feelings.
>>16893541
Pls tell me how your "science" isn't just guess work and you should actually let it be handled by the big boys in neurology and neuro science...
Been having bad headaches I the morning. Periods of about 5-10 seconds or so where I start shaking. So depressed/tired I can't get through day to day things such as going to class. I keep forgetting easy material and my headache gets worse when I try to study/do homework, to the point where I just quit. Vision keeps blurring in and out as well.
I'm sure I need to see a doctor about this but could it just be a migraine or should I be worried about a tumor? I had an unstable mood for months before these symptoms kicked in, was taking mood stabilizers to fight it but they haven't worked well.
>>16902786
OP here. It sounds like there is a lot going on here. Your GF has a history of mental health issues that became exacerbated when she was lost her support system from moving away. Now she is back and crazier than ever, but she wants to work on her issues, and not see you anymore. Is that about right?
It sounds like you have a pretty good handle on yourself, which means that you could be a good influence, but you shouldn't press anything, like you said, being in a fake friendship isn't going to make anyone happy. So I would say give her plenty of space, but the BPD makes it difficult, as a lot of their behavior can be a cry for help and a sign she wants you to double down on your commitment to her. This is the shiftiness of BPD, they scream 'go away!' when what they really mean is 'I'm scared, please don't leave me!'
So saying something like 'I understand you are dealing with a lot, and if you need space I will give you space, but I love you, and I'm not going to give up on us'.
Good luck anon.
>>16902898
OP here. I disagree with this advice for the previous anon. While it helped in your situation, I don't think ruminating over what you were like in the past is a good way to cultivate your future.
>>16902961
OP here. I would suggest you take the Meyer Briggs and Ennegram personality tests. I think understanding just how normal you are will give you an idea of how abnormal you are, also. Then you can better decide whether or not you would like to start meds.
I am guessing you will probably see how normal it is for some to get wiped out by having lots of socializing, and need some quiet time to mentally digest all that interaction
>>16902967
Thanks for reading through! Hopefully it helps.
I go around feeling as if I'm sad about something, but that something is not there and I'm just sad.
Mixed with the fact that I feel just incapable of expressing anything of it and that it just builds up to a roiling sea of negative emotions in my head, yeah, I'm good.
What is this shit? I want it gone.
>>16903047
OP here. Is there a question you have? I like to know what to look for when I'm reading through people's stories, especially one as long as yours
>>16902986
OP here. I like this advice. Thanks for contributing.
>>16904735
Probably something to do with a fear of commitment and sort of purposely isolating yourself - something along those lines and anything else you can muster up I guess
>>16904678
That last line is a pretty good end note, I'll probably steal it for what's probably going to be my last letter to her for a while, otherwise, I'll see where it goes after sending it, lest I'm shoehorned into unlearning another ex until we hate each other, I have another period of screaming internally 24/7, and I reject life by going through another hikikomori phase
There's a decent chance I can probably feel as miserable as she is, minus the mental issues, I just learned to be especially-good at turning my negativity/semi-depression/loathing off around other people while managing it solo since 2008, especially when all of my other friends are probably just as miserable, and need SOME sort of solid figure to come to for feel issues ĀÆ\_(ć)_/ĀÆ Weed also helps
>>16903026
You know, this is my fourth thread in /adv/, and I've been waiting for you this entire time.
Aren't fetishes fascinating?! Yours is untraditional, but not impressively bizarre. It can be (relatively) easily explained. The real weirdos are the balloon fetish people. Understanding them would take serious work.
So you are ashamed of what gets you sexually excited? You'll have to get in line, and it's a long one. Can a therapist help? Probably. The paradox of sexual fetishes is that we like them BECAUSE WE ARENT SUPPOSED TO. We love that it's naughty. So therapy can help you realize why you like dressing up like a baby, and once you realize the 'why', then I think you can quickly lose interest. Or you will at least make it egosyntotic, meaning that you won't feel strife because of it
>>16903075
Yeppers!
>>16903505
OP here. What country you in? Because we work a bit different here in the United States of Trump.
I'm a psychiatry resident (hence the term junior). Not gonna identify myself any further as that opens up liability issues and lawsuits are really my thing.
>>16903505
Oh, and how is med school treating you? Are you already pretty determined on a specialty? Are you interested in psych? It's a great field! Seriously!
I feel like I'm underwater and like nothing I do has an effect. I spend days alone and I don't regret it
diagnose me up doc
>>16903952
OP here, sure you can 'fake' it for at least a little while, but it sounds like you are really wondering if the symptoms can change in severity over time, which the answer is still yes. Also, different tests have different sensitivity and specificity, so some tests will make you positive while others won't.
As far as having time on inpatient psych, it matters very little. Depending on where you live, mental health records are treated with various levels of confidentiality. But even so, the only people who really have access to that information will be other doctors, who truthfully aren't gonna bat an eye to someone spending time on a psych ward. Plenty of high functioning people have mental health problems. There's even a TED Talk by a famous surgeon about his time on an inpatient ward
>>16904326
OP here.
Wow, this is definitely a first for me. Would you mind telling us your situation?
>>16896241
Thanks OP, that's a good idea, I'll try it.
>>16893541
When does being depressed to due to life become clinical depression? Been feeling depressed for a long time (like years and years) but I can trace all my depression to my situation.
>>16893541
OP, how do I get over a breakup? Everyone just says to stop thinking about it, but I'm having a lot of difficulty doing that. It's been a few months. It was a breakup with a close friend, not a love interest, if that makes a difference.
>>16904886
fuck on a new bitch every night
>>16904380
OP here. I'm sorry you don't find this advice helpful, but from your general attitude about yourself I really doubt that advice is something that you are going to benefit from. There isn't anything that I can say that you will be able to walk away with and live a better life. I can't fix your problems. Only you can do that, and to do that you're gonna need some therapy.
>>16904461
OP here. Having kind judgmental personality that borders on toxic is a pretty common symptom of atypical depression, which is more difficult to treat that the more typical forms. Really the best thing is cognitive behavioral therapy (you can get a CBT workbook at Amazon, and its a standardized therapy so just get a cheap one) and mindfulness/ meditation. It takes some practice to turn off this amygdala stress circuit, but once get it the first time you'll be hooked, because for people like you and me who are just grinding away, feeling chill is better than any drug.
Good luck brother. I hope you give it a serious shot. You'll be grateful you did
>>16904966
Cock and ball torture?
Are you American and hence rely on drugs entirely?
Do you really think people can cure depression when it's at the stage where people experience DID essentially? (don't sugarcoat it doc)
>>16904632
OP here. I wouldn't normally feed the troll, but this is a pretty common criticism of psychiatry, and not unjustly so.
Psychiatry split from neurology at a time when the only pathologic analyses available was the X-ray and autopsy. Every syndrome that had a psychical correlate (could be seen if you took a chunk of tissue and examined it under a light microscope) was taken up by neurology, and everything else was carved up by psychiatry. So at the advent of modern psychiatry, we started with what was essentially 'unscienceable' neurology. And therefore all of the science we could do was indirect, and lots of theories and personalities and politics riddled the early history of psychiatry.
But, as anyone can tell you, as technology advanced, so did our methods of understanding how the brain works, so much so that the differences between psychiatry and neurology are so arbitrary, they are starting to combine the medical residencies to train them. And with new imaging techniques, and expanding knowledge of genomics, epigenetics, and immunology, were are at the first light of anew golden age of psychiatry.
How do I gauge a girls interest?
First time I talked to her she was loud open ect
Second time I talked she kinda seemed nervous, quieter, legs crossed at knees and one was pointing to me. She laughs at my stuff.
She kind of orbits me, but it's likely because there's not many chairs in class.
What should I look for if she is, and isn't into me?
>>16904638
OP here.
Headaches in the morning is a classic sign of 'mass effect', which can be caused my masses or by obstruction in the circulation of CSF, the fluid that your brain and nervous system bathe in. However, these headaches tend to last much longer than seconds, usually from several minutes to even hours.
Vision changes also indicate a mass effect. Changes to your mood isn't suggestive either way.
Truthfully, if you came into my office with the same list of complaints, I would side with caution and go ahead and get a scan. Then, if the scan was negative, we could talk about other potential work up and treatment.
>>16904732
OP here. Can you explain this a little further?
>>16904765
OP here.
Oh man, anon. I'm gonna have a glass of wine and read this tonight. I will have a response for you tomorrow. Is that okay?
>>16904767
OP again
You know, anon, you are free to cut ties with her as you see fit. You aren't obligated to the crazy. But at the same time, you obviously have your shit together, and at the same time you can speak her language of crazy. You could be a really good influence for her, and at the same time having to be the one who has to keep his shit together might do you some good, also.
Just a thought.
>>16904820
OP here
Diagnosis: You are a drowning poet.
If you want a better diagnosis, you have to give me a better patient.
>>16904865
OP here.
This question is tough to answer for a couple reasons. First, there isn't one accepted criteria for what differentiates situational v pathological depression. Second, every person is so different, that it's impossible to know what would be normal adjustment versus clinical depression.
But what this really comes down to, which I'm sure will rustle some jimmies, is that we live in a modern world, where we can give bones to people who shouldn't be having boners. We use science to our benefit because we want our existence to be better than what it is currently. If you seriously feel like you would be better off on an antidepressant, that's enough reason to start you up on one and at least give you a chance to see what it's like.
Some people get pissed, saying things like 'psychiatrists just want to throw you on pills' and 'if you are depressed you have the power to change it'. They say this, while on the other side, if a woman says 'fuck it, I want bigger titties' we have surgeons throw in some big juicy titties, without a peep from the peanut gallery
>>16905089
That's it. I feel nothing
>>16904886
OP here.
The best advice I ever got regarding this, was to burn your sad candle at both ends. Don't fear being sad. Don't be ashamed. Just openly and actively be sad. Stay at m home one night, eat a pint of ice cream, watch a sad movie, and think about the friend you loved and the friendship that's over and just CRY YOU BALLS OFF. Sometime before the end of your night you'll be crying and you'll think 'goddamn this is stupid, what the fuck am I doing' and it will be over.
And you know what, anon, it works almost every time.
>>16905122
Would pills really help? I mean my social situation's been crap for years and on the very, very rare occasions when it isn't so bad I feel almost elated like starving homeless man being thrown a single cracker.
>>16904985
Haha, I even put cognitive behavioral therapy right before the abbreviation, but I like the way you think, anon.
>>16905015
OP here.
I'm pretty sure that girl was spilling spaghetti the second time you saw her. Ask her out, you fool!
Ps, women love confidence, so even if she isn't totally spaghetti over you, she will think you having the guts to ask her out is totally sexy, and might say yes anyway
>>16905139
Whelp, there you go then. Drowning poet.
'Next!'
>>16905147
I honestly think they will help. And if they don't help, you can quit taking them. People have a weird hangup on pills, like if you agree to take them then you agree to take them forever regardless of if you want to. Like us docs want you to continue taking something that doesn't work?
>>16905165
Judging by your choice of words I think you may be wrong...
Everyone loves confidence, my brother used it to bluff police after he flipped them off
>>16904992
Bump. Doc why aren't you receiving me? We had an appointment and I've been in the waiting room for an hour.
>>16905208
"Girls" is a subset of "everyone."
>>16905215
It's because this isn't a waiting room and you aren't wearing any clothes!
I think I have like, a literal fear of flirting with girls or responding to flirting.
>qtpie girl who I'm friendly with at work seems like she wants to move in for a hug, but I don't reciprocate
>at party, 2 girls dancing/talking to each other, move close enough to me to the point that's rude to not say/do anything, proceed to not say/do anything until they walk away
>at bar with a group, make eye contact with girl several times, later a friend tries getting me to dance with her, I refuse, try looking at nothing and thinking about a thing I liked as a child and feeling scared
>>16905182
It's not really that, it's more taking a drug to make me feel better for something that seems to be caused by external issues. Then again for the last few years people have told me I'm a depressing person.
>>16893541
do you like dick
jk, i have a serious question: how do i stop being chronically indecisive? I cannot make a choice about anything. About what plans for the weekend, about changing jobs, about whether to remain with my gf or not. wat do
>>16905298
Noo i was dreaming all along.
.t Azathoth
>>16904805
Australia, so i have including this year, five years left with residency. Planning on going to the UK to specialise though since their health department trumps everyone. Nah fair enough family, it's tough enough as it is, last thing you want is a anime imageboard to ruin it.
Pretty tough, not much free time in order to keep on top of everything. Advanced biochem is my bane though, everything else is simple. Psych bro's for life. (why i even considered med was to do psych).
>>16905311
OP here.
Your situation dictates your mood which dictates your situation. Maybe what you need is a little bump in the right direction to get you out of this funk.
But besides all that, do you really feel like you DESERVE being depressed all the time? If you could change it, wouldn't you?
>>16905324
OP here
What do you think will happen if you make the wrong choice?
>>16905356
Do you have to do undergrad before med school?
Why should anyone trust you that you are a psychiwhatever?
Besides, psychology is horseshits of bullshit.
It's literally someone trying to know about you than yourself.
>>16905456
Yeah, I did a Science degree majoring in Biomedical science with a minor in chemistry. If you're Australian that is (might be different in other countries).
I'm trying to figure out what the fuck is up with my friend and her wife
>Married
>They used to live apart, now they're together
>Across eight years, one of marriage, she cheated with four/five different people, including me, wife knows all of it, stays with her
>Talked about divorce openly with her wife, never did it
>Developed strong feelings for me because she felt guilty and I was there for her while she cried
>Pinned our affair entirely on me even though she invited me over to watch a movie in her bed, asked me sexually charged questions, dressed sexy, etc
>Would say "no, stop", then when I would pull away she'd get upset and entice me back into bed
>Told me to come inside her, unprotected
>Would say "You only hang out with me because you think I'm cute"
>Was mad at me that I apparently didn't make enough of an effort to see her (I only canceled on her once) even though we were supposedly just friends
>Offered me the key to her house while she was on vacation (an hour's drive away from my work and home)
>Her wife found out and *let us keep being friends as long as we didn't do anything*
>That didn't happen, stopped talking for a few months
>Told her wife every time she missed me
>I go into my work, she's there
>Wife apparently tells her to invite me over, we reconnect
>Wife starts texting me about our convo that night
>Girl eventually starts regularly sending me "thinking of/thankful for you" texts
>Invites me on a road trip that her wife wasn't going on until she invited me
>Randomly offered me her car for the weekend, I have my own
What kind of disorders they got?
>>16905477
>knowing you better than yourself
Well don't we see ourself as a special little snowflake.
Btw, that's not actually how psychiatry works. why do you casual fucks always think all psychiatrists treat are people with subclinical issues. You see those people that are talking to themselves on the street? Those are our patients. Not everyone lives a comfortable suburban life you know
>>16905646
They're degenerates. That's for sure.
>>16905748
This.
Also work in mental health and all you people bitching about your random self-diagnosed "i'm sad and antisocial" disorders are fucking normies compared to the folks I work with.
>>16905763
What comfortable lives they lead
>>16905646
OP here. So I got that the chick is kind of a whore. What's the husbands deal?
>>16905934
When I said wife I meant hers. I don't know why but she just lets her do it. One time when she was denying that anything was happening between us her wife just said "I just want you to be happy..." Her wife also said that we needed to "figure out what our relationship was going to be" before she went back home for Thanksgiving. Then when she mentions that I had just walked through the door she apparently said "you should introduce me to him" and has tried to establish a relationship with me which is really bugging me. And when we were talking, the girl was displaying some "fuck me right now" body language right in front of her wife. It's almost like the cuck meme come to life, though I don't think she gets off on it or anything.
The girl cries after they have sex, has tried to leave multiple times across their eight years, it's just fucking ridiculous how hard her wife holds on to her. Apparently she's just "emotionally mature" and can "separate her feelings from how her loved ones are affected" but that's... retarded. There's nothing immature about trying to stop your wife from cheating on you again. This girl puts her through so much emotional pain and she just takes it and loves her unconditionally.
I haven't looked through the thread to see if this has been asked yet, but on Monday I went to see my school's in-house psychologist. It's generally making sure I'm not in danger of killing myself, then I'm referred to someone else. I chose to not go through my insurance (because I'm still under my parents' insurance and don't want to get them involved) so I'm paying per session once I start.
What should I expect? I've never sought mental help before and I am a bit scared about opening up and such. How long should I expect to go for something like depression?
>>16893670
Because its cathartic. It helps you feel that pain you've been burying from your fathers death.
>>16893541
I have been struggling with an anxiety disorder for a while.
I have compulsions about waking up (if I wake up before noon, I feel really sick; I work nights but it's still a problem).
And I have a phobia of vomiting.
I've been in therapy for about a year without seeing much of an improvement.
I'm sort of scared of medication.
What should I do?
>>16904966
Hey OP, thank you. I hadn't considered this diagnosis at all,but it sounds on spot. I will give CBT and mindfulness a try.
I live in a country where I could get cheap pills too. Is there a reason you don't recommend pharmaceutical treatment in this case?
>>16906104
So you are having sex with a woman in a lesbian marriage, or is English not your first language?
>>16906152
OP here
Therapy is actually way more laid back than people expect. It's actually pretty cool, for both the patient and the therapist. You will be surprised how much you like it
As for how long, it really depends. It depends on your problem. It depends on how much use you get out of you therapist. Most of the time, people grow out of their therapist, and need a new one in order to keep moving forward. So it depends on a lot
>>16906182
OP here. Go see your goddamn Doctor. There isn't any advice that I am going to give you that helps.
>>16906499
OP here. Believe it or not, anon, you sound like a guy who can handle his problems pretty well. And your problem is more of a thinking problem than a feeling problem. If the CBT doesn't work out you can try some meds to help bump you up
>>16896333
I'd still like a answer pham. (I did apply for student psych though )
>>16906610
Oh shit, sorry anon, I was meaning to write you back. Give me an hour?
>>16906639
Sure
OP here?
Last Monday, my GF broke up with me. She's in Taiwan now for her Exchange semester and so now we have no contact at all. I'm 25, she was my first 'real' girlfriend of almost a year.
I have some trouble dealing with some things:
- One moment I feel so incredibly confident and the other moment I feel like total shit and I can't stop thinking about her. Any advice on how I can succesfully 'cope' with these transitions? Yesterday I was working and at some point something just hit me and I could not focus very well either.
- The fact that, last week, we were still talking about doing stuff together in Taiwan (I already booked my ticket on seeing her) and just the situation now - having no contact at all - makes me tear sometimes.
- How can I use the coming period to better myself and to improve?
- Might be stupid, but while I feel confident in myself and I notice that I doubt myself way less and less, I have a bit of fear for the future. I'm finishing my Master's in July and am not sure what to do after that. I want to travel and it frightens me again even though I travelled on my own last year as well (however, she was still my GF back then, I had a great exchange semester behind my back, etc). How to deal with that?
- How can I "forgive"? Meaning that I am accepting the situation as is and that, if I see her in half a year again in town, for example, I have no wrath or anger towards her?
Lots of questions, sorry, but I feel like I am already on the right track of keeping myself busy and so I want to know even more what I can do.
>>16906639
Oh i want to add i have friends but not from the uni so i'm 'alone' in my town. Also a reason
>>16906692
So, what is it about being a college student that you feel doesn't live up to the promise?
What I lack in motivation/self-esteem I make up for in depression/anxiety. How can I become more motivated so that I am less of a fuck up?
>>16906782
Like i said no friends or girls.
>>16893541
About me
>32 year old male kissless virgin
>University dropout and self-taught mostly in IT field
>Worked in IT for the last 10 years, recently unemployed
>No self-esteem or confidence for the last 10 years
>I have no real friends (just acquaintances) and no social life
I think I'm a failure
I believe I don't deserve anything good to happen to me
I believe I'm worst than everybody
When people congratulate me and want to hang out with me I feel they are lying
I feel like strangers in the street are pointing and laughing at me
I don't think I had any success in life
I think only about my failures and feel bad
What are my options?
In my 30 years of life I didn't manage to build confidence and self-esteem.
I don't know how to do it now?
Should I go to a therapist?
Can they help me, just by taking and consulting?
What about group therapy? Can it help or is it worthless?
Should I feel embarrassed for being weak and going to a therapist?
>>16893541
I have anxiety issues, severe depression, issues with other people (possibly somewhere on the spectrum), and I think I might have schizophrenia.
I know why I have these issues, I even know where they stem from, but I still can't do anything against them. How could a shrink even help me?
>>16906784
Read the goddamn thread!
>>16906645
I really recommend you start seeing one of the university counsellors. This is kind of their bag. Lots of people think that somehow they are going to break out of their shell once they get to college, and the fact of the matter is, it takes work, and I think seeing a therapist can help you make that happen
>>16906648
Always sadly
>>16906917
That's my plan i contacted the student psychologist at my uni he probably deals with this kind of stuf as well.
>>16906683
OP here, I'm sorry, but this thread has gone on for long enough, and you are like the 29th person who is has neurosis and you still write the exact same shit and for some goddamn reason you think you are special just like every body else.
Life isn't what you thought it would be? Well get in line
You aren't as productive as you'd like to be?
Get in the other line
Women aren't as straight forward as you hoped?
Of shit, is that the line? The one going around the corner? Get the fuck in this line because it fills up fast.
Now, I'm not gonna tell you to simply 'man the fuck up' and go be alpha and slay bitches like you have a twelve inch dong. But I am telling you to man the duck up, get in some goddamn therapy, and realize how goddamn fortunate you are to have the problems that you do. I was raised by a single mother who left me dad because he beat the ever loving shit out of her. I don't remember three years of my childhood. I had no money for 'Uni' and so I joined the goddamn army and went to mother fucking war and saw people blown the fuck apart, and I still got out, went to college, made honors, and got into medical school and somehow turned into someone who dispenses advice instead of taking it.
Simply put, your life isn't that goddamn hard. And maybe if you actually did do something that requires some goddamn effort, you would be lmore greatful and confident about the shy that to DO have
peace fucking out
>>16906947
If you were a psychiatrist who deals with clients that way in real life, I hope you get your license revoked. It has no fucking sense to talk about your own problems if someone else comes to you with questions because that doesn't mean shit. You don't answer questions, you just say to people: 'man the fuck up' instead of coming up with real suggestions or practical handings.
But good job, you made me motivated to actually listen more to other people's problems and to sometimes actually give advice myself. So go fuck yourself, and have a nice day.
>>16906960
im glad I empowered you, anon. Now go out and spread your wings!
How can I get myself to tell my gf I love her?
I have quite a closed personality and have severe difficulty expressing my feelings. Everytime I see her there is a moment where I feel like telling her, where the inside of my head is creaming tell her you love her. But the words refuse to come out.
>>16906588
Was and yes. She's bisexual and whenever she cheated it was with a guy
>>16906960
From someone who works and has worked in the mental health field for at 15 years now, "man the fuck up" is an attitude that, if it was more prevalent, would go miles towards ACTUALLY helping a huge percentage of the patients I've had to deal with.
>>16907122
You cant just tell someone to "man the fuck up" like it just happens within a second. That attitude takes time and if you can not help people with goal setting or actually giving them practical exercises, handings or insight, then you are a shit social worker in my opinion.
>>16893824
I'm in the same boat, everyone in my regiment is normie as hell, and I can't find anything to talk about with them. Literally all they do is booze, party, and have orgies. Heathens, really--
But the fact that we have the luxury to be bored, is reason enough to continue to live. We'll find someone or something good some day, anon.
>>16907362
>But the fact that we have the luxury to be bored, is reason enough to continue to live. We'll find someone or something good some day, anon.
I'd rather make a lot of money and then top myself.
Taking Wellbutrin XL 300mg
Still feel a desire to not concentrate, to literally sit there staring at a wall. My anxiety is gone which is great, my heart rate was consistently 120+ and I was always on edge now I'm more calm but I have no motivation and I need things to be done. I tried eating more and fapping to no avail.
They said ADHD/anxiety, what can I do to motivate myself?
>>16907122
Depends on the situation. If you're just being subjective, say whatever you want.
If you're being professional, that's the worst thing to say. You're reminding him of his situation, implicitly saying that he is not a man right now.
So yeah better choose your words.
And before you ask, I don't have any degree, I'm a poor student.
Is it fun?
>>16907416
OP here
If you do have ADHD, finding ways to motivate yourself without the use of meds can be difficult. Your brain constantly needs stimulus in order to keep focus or you will get bored easily.
My recommendation is actually to try out some meds. If you aren't interested in that avenue, try setting time limits on what you are doing. If you are studying, take 10min breaks every 30min, and change the subject every hour. Things like that
>>16907443
Is psychiatry fun? Heck yes, your patients are super interesting and you get to hear their stories. Bipolar people who are in a manic phase are the best, you walk away feeling totally pumped and jazzed
>>16893541
So I've been in this massive rut. I had a great relationship, which I blew about 2 months ago. Since then, this woman is constantly on my mind, but she has barricaded herself into this personal castle of sorts that she won't let me into. She has trust issues with men and while I feel like what I did was relatively insignificant in the grand scheme of things, she won't budge. Now I have finally reached a point where I'm realizing that what she's doing is only in the interest of herself and I pretty much just leave her alone but I know she's hurting as much as I was or maybe still am. I have a job that takes balls, travel all over for work, live in hotels and meet all kinds of women in bars or restaurants or even working at the hotel. Most of these girls are giving green light signals to me and the guys on my crew from the moment we meet them and they find out what we do etc... Being single now, I feel like I should just go for it, but my ex and her being hurt are all I can think about. I wish I could just convince her to let me in enough to help us both seek some kind of closure whether it's ending it or trying again. I've been short-tempered, irritable and generally down in the dumps for far too long. If I can't get her to even talk to me, will this feeling ever go away?
>>16905302
is there no hope for me doc?
> know that ghosts, demons, monsters and shit don't exist
> worry that something scary is in the room with me or near me when I'm alone / in the dark
What the fuck, brain?
>>16906600
Thanks, man. I appreciate the words of confidence. I'll give cbt and mindfulness a serious shot and report back in here when I get there. Could take a while though.
Thanks again. It's not about feelings at its core, but my resulting feeling of despair is weaker already.
>>16905454
I don't know if there's one single explanation for all instances of my indecisiveness. But in general I tend to feel like I never have the right information to make a good choice, and if I end up making the wrong one I'l be kicked out of something really good. For example: if I change jobs now, I'll end up ruining my relationship with current employers which is pretty decent.
>>16893541
OP, I have my 1st appointment with a psychiatrist next friday.
It's against my inner beliefs of how to life and how to deal with my issues but recent events in my personal life made me realize that my current self just can't control it anymore.
Wish me luck OP.
Also, considering I actually get some prescription, what kind of side effects should I expect?
My fianceƩ claims that her meds for histrionic personality disorder (I dont know if the name changed in DSM-V or if it's spelled like that in ENglish - not my main language) affected her memory after some time.
Can I post about my girlfriend?
She has some issues from her upbringing and they're starting to be a huge strain on our relationship and I'm losing my patience and I don't know what to do.
>>16909251
OP here. Heck yeah son!
Nothing I do in life feels like it has any merit.
I'm finishing an as in computer science this semester, but I'm poor as shit (going to school entirely on grants). I'm 22 without a job and without any friends. I was diagnosed with aspergers when I was 6 or so. I'm hiding up in my room by myself, whenever I'm not in class. I feel like my life situation dogs me wherever I go, and I can't help but avoid people or just kinda shift uncomfortably when they try to engage me.
What the fuck can I do?
>>16908440
Are you still talking to this ex?
>>16908840
So what about it scares you?
>>16909357
Yes, but it's very cold and impersonal. She doesn't even act like the woman I lived with and shared a bed with. I know it's a defense mechanism and she also knows that I can see right through it, so then she shuts down and tells me that we can't talk right now.
Hey OP as a new grad dentist, any tips on management of phobic patients?
>>16908931
One of the first things indecisive people need to do when making a decision, is understanding the consequences of making the wrong choice.
Your mantra for most things should be
'It just doesn't matter'
Also, start to realize that your indecisiveness is in itself a decision: you decide to be indecisive. If you can make the decision to do it, you can make the decision to not
>>16909193
OP here
I like to explain people reluctant to see a psychiatrist is this way: how many other problems in your life to you leave up to a soecialist?
If you have a problem with your plumbing you hire a plumber. Got a knot in your back? You go get a massage. You don't rebuild your own transmission, do you?
Just because the problem that you have is of a more personal nature, it doesn't mean that you wouldn't hire a specialist to fix the problem. You wouldn't do your own colonoscopy just because it involves putting a camera in your asshole.
Truth be told, the most successful people in he world use psychiatrists and psychologists. It's just more efficient
>>16909339
OP here
First of all, if you are getting your degree, you shouldn't be hung up on not being financially secure. It's an investment in your future. Gotta spend money to make money.
Secondly, if you want to be more social you've got to practice. Sure, it's uncomfortable, but thats what practice is. Think of someone learning to play the violin. That shit is awful and nobody wants any part of it. Sure, it's easier to give up but, just like your CS degree, the future payoff is worth the initial displeasure
>>16909375
>>16909375
Well, anon, it sounds like she is putting forth active effort to get over you. Maybe you should do the same.
Plus it sounds like you have chance to move on and find someone who is a real catch. Maybe someone that isn't so much of a pain in the butt
>>16909387
Benzos and communication.
I'm sure it must be an issue to get patients to follow up. I think listening to thei concerns would help quite a bit, just enough attention that they feel like you are invested in making sure their experience is a positive one
I used to have these theories about my therapist, that he's not who he says he is and either isn't properly trained or intentionally trying to ruin my life by confusing me, that he's a government spy recording his patients, that he's sharing my secrets with his family and the community, and if I told him all this or stopped seeing him he would hurt me or my family. Am I crazy?
I CONSTANTLY think about making changes in my life (getting a degree, filling out college app, working out, meditating) but I never do it. When I think about it I get overwhelmed and feel very stuck. I have a huge problem with dissociation and zoning out for several hours at a time (though I never lose time, it's easy for me to get sidetracked). I want very badly to be more aware and present in my life. Thinking and being in my head is making me miserable but I'm not sure how to get out.
What do
>>16909595
Not OP but yes. You're definitely paranoid, and if you believe these thoughts you're schizophrenic.
>>16909602
I don't believe them at all but they cross my mind.
>>16909613
Just paranoid then. Talk to your therapist about it. I have thoughts like that too. Often it's caused by growing up in a persecutory environment.
>>16905208
Confidence does work on girls though, anon. Do it, and even if she isn't interested in you already she might become interested if you approach her.
>>16905064
Yeah that's fine if you're still even looking into it
Well, I guess I'm bored enough to venture asking something that's been gnawing away at me for some years now.
I have trouble in a variety of social situations. I guess it might be trouble with anxiety. My friends and boyfriend have been suggesting I get help for a while now.
When my doctor (general care physician, not psych doctor- I've never actually sought mental help before) left her practice, I never set up with arranging a new doctor. I procrastinated, and now I haven't seen a doctor in I guess at least 5 years now, probably more, I haven't been keeping track. At some point it spiraled into a real problem, because now I'm so anxious about admitting I've let it get this bad, and I have no idea how I'd dig up my old medical records, which I figure would be essential to getting any medical or mental help. I don't even know my own bloodtype, and I'm irrationally terrified of admitting that to a stranger, especially to a doctor. It's very embarrassing to me, actually, and I've been refusing to own up to it even though I'd like to just get a regular physical exam and go on birth control again and get some kind of treatment for my anxiety issues. I'm lucky to have finally gotten medical insurance again last year after also going without it for nearly as much time, but only because it was possible to obtain it via mail and internet without ever interacting directly with a human being.
So I guess tldr, my question would be: how difficult is it to see a mental health professional when you don't have a general care physician, and haven't had even a basic physical in 5+ years? How would I even start finding a headshrink other than a medical doctor's referral? Do you suppose my insurance (very cheap very basic state issued plan) would be okay with it?
