Over 2 years into my relationship and while we've had a bumpy road, everything's pretty amazing, only I can't shake this bad feeling all of a sudden. I almost went through her diary and read it, but I asked her if I was going to find anything bad and she told me no, and I just trusted her, because I love her that much, but I can't drop it now because months ago I'd read it and found many disturbing heart breaking things about me, about her wanting to leave me for other men, yada yadda, a bunch of fucked up shit. Now I swear, I KNOW for a fact we're better now than we used to be, our relationship has never been stronger and we both obviously deeply care about eachother, but I still just can't shake the feeling, the question "did I make the right decision?" By not reading her diary? I don't want to invade her personal diary if I don't need to, but at the same time, if she's writing things like she was before, I need to know about it, it wouldn't be the first time she's lied to me and his something by a long shot either
>>16854685
I'm a dude and have kept a journal for almost 8 years now
I'd probably murder, and definitely leave a girl who read through it.
It's her private shit, you're a retard for reading it in the first place
>>16854685
You read her diary once, did it actually do anything except find out some pointless information? if no or it was only a little help you can stop reading now and understand that you shouldnt.
so you're still reading which meant it was a help. do you suspect her of anything? such as cheating, liking another, wanting to separate then i suggest trying to in secret just for peace of mind if its really bothering you.
that hasn't solved your problem, right here is an easy thing to try. when not far from the diary ask your gf if you can read it, if shes says yeah, you have peace of mind and you dont have to read it. if she says no then you know something is up and that you should probably.
last thing, it all boils down if
your paranoia < your trust
hope this helped just a guys oppion
>>16854717
>>16854720
The thing is, the first time I read it, I did find out important information that almost ended our relationship because she lied to me, wanted to leave me, etc.
This does now leave me with the paranoia of "is this going to happen again? Am I wrong for just trusting and not reading it, when it could be the exact same thing as before"
when people say relationships are built on trust, what they should be saying is relationships fall apart when there is distrust. you don't build relationships on trust. you hardly know this person you just started dating, there's not a solid-trust foundation.
if you want to save your relationship FUCK TRUST. Pretend that you're courting her, and some other dude is trying to get in her pants too, and she's flirting back with him.
You can give up the race, or try and win her affections. It's always about trying to impress her more than other guy, that never ends. The minute you trust someone, they're goon fuck someone else because you're not trying to impress them. stop reading her diary, period
it's fantasy shit, it's not real. dear diary i'd like to have 6 bbc in my ass. what good did it do for you to read that? none
stop trusting that slut, and start lifting, study harder, get a better job, make more money, provide a nice home. if someone offers her something better, and it doesn't look like you want to give her something better, then guess what? she should leave you
that's just the way it is
>>16854739
You are a paranoid motherfucker who can't leave what's theirs the fuck alone. You're self destructing this relationship.
>>16854748
You're completely off m8
We've been together over 2 years, I DO lift actually lol, doing C6W and I'm on Test/Tren/Dbol (tren probably adding to the paranoia actually lol) so better looking than 90% of people (in murrica), just got a new job and I make pretty decent money for my age, and I treat her like a fucking princess I'm so madly in love with her. You're saying don't trust her, but don't read her diary? What the fuck is that? If I don't trust her, I'm reading that fucking diary, but if I did THEN I'm not gonna read it, because I respect her right to privacy as she does mine. You make a good point though in one sense, I am probably her best possible option as far as raw sex appeal, and I'm *somewhat* successful, nothing amazing, but for a 21 year old w no degree I think I'm doing p alright for myself, can buy any and everything I need at this point and don't have to struggle, so I am probably the best candidate for bf material anyways, even before I begin thinking about all the other reasons she'd want to be with me, so yeah I'm sure im just being paranoid now.
>>16854800
>I treat her like a fucking princess
she's not a princess, so stop treating her like one. she's a dirty filthy whore, and she doesn't deserve you. she needs to lift, and work her ass off to impress you, or you're gonna go fuck someone else.
>>16854720
>>16854748
Thanks guys, only two posts that really helped. Everyone saying "omg you jealous paranoid piece of shit you deserve to be dumped", doesn't understand what it feels like to have their heart broken into a million little pieces by someone you love's secrets. If you genuinely love the person you're with, even though you might have some slightly embarrassing stuff in your diary, you'd still show them if it meant their sanity and trust, because there would be nothing awful that would change things between you.
>>16854685
>>16854739
I write a lot when I'm upset with my boyfriend and I usually exaggerate. She probably was just using it to vent, and then got over it. Stop being a paranoid fuck, trust her. You're invading her personal space by reading her diary. If she actually wanted to leave you, she probably would.
If the lies you read about were huge (and not about little stupid things), then make the judgement and leave if you can't deal with those kind of things anymore.
>>16854685
>I read your diary and found some things I didnt like
aka
>I dont trust you and you arent trustworthy
End it senpai. You are a shitty bf and shes a shitty gf. That being said you are worse than her since those are just thoughts she didnt act on. Kinda like if I had a hot co-worker at my job try to seduce me but I resisted and vented in my diary about how bad I wanted to bang her. I didnt really do anything wrong but you would have for invading my privacy.
>>16854828
Fuck off m8 lol
What are you 12
>you can't treat her well or she'll get bored
While, yes I wish she would lift and get in better shape, I'm in love with her already for her mind, and she's beautiful and sexy anyways. She's already done a million and one things to impress the fuck out of me at this point, she's already won me over, she's stuck by my side through some pretty shitty situations where no one else would have, that's why I treat her like a princess. And when I say treat her like a princess, I don't mean putting the pussy on a pedestal or any stupid shit like that, just like treating like she's truly the most amazing and lovely person I've ever met and showing my appreciation for having her in my life.
That's how you make a REAL relationship work guy lol
>>16854830
reading a diary is betrayal
knowing that you read her diary.. she doesn't even write anything honest anymore
"seek and ye shall find" means, if you keep looking for something wrong, you're going to find it. happy thoughts make happy lives
>>16854853
Stop making assumptions, you don't know the half of what I found.
>>16854873
I didnt say I did. But you are still worse than she did because you did a terrible action whereas she only had thoughts she didnt act on. You are a very shitty bf no matter how you spin it. The only question is if she is a shitty gf. If you found out she cheated, then yeah, you are both shit. But remember you will always be a shitty bf here.
>>16854873
What did you find?
>>16854878
She did act on her thoughts, she lied to from day 1 of our relationship. I'm not going to go into detail, but trust me, I'm not the bad guy for reading a diary, boo fucking hoo, if she had nothing to hide I'd have had no reason to look through it. Anyways, I'm done arguing, I've decided against reading it most likely. Anon did make a good point about her probably not writing anything bad in there anyways if she suspects I'll ever read it, though I haven't in like a year, on top of the fact that I really don't have much reason to suspect anything I suppose, we just have a rocky past so I feel the need to stay on my toes and try to stay aware of any slightest little giveaways.
Will probably just ask if I can and gauge her reaction like other anon said
>>16854901
>I'm not the bad guy for reading a diary
No you will always be the bad guy no matter what she did. Its only a matter of if she is also a bad gf.
>boo fucking hoo
It always cracks me up when shitty people make this argument. She can say the same thing.
Youre a shit bf. Tell her you read it so that everything can be on the table and she can dump you for being a shitty person.
OP is a closet-cuck. He wants to read in her diary where she did a threesome with the milkman and UPS driver.
Tuesday:
Hubby left for work while i was still sleeping today. He never kisses me goodbye anymore.
I long to feel his tongue caressing mine. hold on diary, someone's at the door.
OMFG it was so awesome. almost a full pint of cream from the milkman today. it's still oozing from my butthole. I don't let hubby go there, cuz that's a special place, and UPSman gave me his package this morning, i finally satisfied that oral craving, my jaw is kind sore after that. goodnight diary
>>16854911
Mr./mrs. White knight fedora sjw, you seemed to have went to 4chan instead of tumblr, thanks but PLS kindly take your white knighting elsewhere
Call it being a bad bf all you want, but my response was clearly justified due to her being a shitty gf. She knows I read it, I read it in front of her as she sobbed begging me to forgive her.
Would you be a shitty boyfriend if you got tipped off your girl was cheating, then you proceeded to go through Her messages and saw she was fucking someone? Maybe, but what's more important is you wouldn't have done that if she had been a Good gf in the first place
>I read it in front of her as she sobbed begging me to forgive her.
made you feel like a big man didn't it. her begging you to stop. please don't hit me
>>16854928
>justified doing something bad
No, it only evens out because you are a shit bf and shes a shit gf. You are a terrible person and that will never be justified. You cant justify and action retroactively. But thats what shitty people try to do all the time so its not surprising.
>what's more important is you wouldn't have done that if she had been a Good gf in the first place
Oh man my sides. Terrible people never seem to understand the other person is just as bad as them and doesnt give a fuck about their feelings either. Maybe you need to stay together. Id hate for you to be with someone who isnt as shitty as you.
>>16854974
Lol you're a basket case m8
Reading someone's diary is not the end of the fucking world, you're acting like I'm the one who cheated. Last time I checked cheating is worse than catching someone cheating through questionnable means
>>16854967
Wow adv sucks for advice srs
You think I enjoyed having my fucking heart torn into a million little pieces. Yeah it felt really fucking great.
Get the feeling there's one femanon in here flipping out because she has a diary in which she writes about cheating, but she's the type of dumb bitch to say "OH WELL ITS YOUR FAULT FOR READING IT! I'M LEAVING YOU!" Like they're not the antagonist in this situation
No bitch, if you weren't a sketchy shady bitch, than no one would have a reason to want to read your diary
I hope she meets someone who respects her. Not a dick who makes her cry, and reads her diary. Talk to a shrink OP, you need help.
you're absolutely right OP you deserve better than a fat bitch that dreams. start looking
