>>16757081

your loneliness seems to only be tied to your alone-ness. maybe not but based on the story you're telling us, that is it.

that means you're basically a bit over stimulated when it comes to interaction and attention. thats pretty unhealthy if by the end of a day alone you feel depressed. it also doesn't bode well for the future because lets be real, interaction becomes less consistent as you get older.

imo you should take those days you have off and make an effort to enjoy them. you might be too busy to truly enjoy a productive hobby like writing a book or drawing a comic, but perhaps you can take smaller activities to break up the day with something you like.

a lot of people will sit down on a day off and just vegetate on the couch with netflix but after about 6 episodes its no longer relaxing, you burn out and get frustrated.

write down somethings you want to do, some like chores some like playing video games etc. try to make a list of what to do on your day off and break up the leisure with things like 'go for a walk with (with the dog?)' or 'ride my bike' or something.

make it a piint to acknowledge whats nice about the day and your brain will start to treat it like its nice