So basically, my wife's been secretly watching porn for the past couple of years.
It's nothing kinky, infact, funnily enough it's exactly the same things we both enjoy doing to each other..
to give you some background, we've been married 7 years now. Have an extremely good relationship and are both madly in love with each other and do genuinely care for each other.
Wife's got an amazing body and sex has been good overall.
We've had to go through a really tough patch in the past 2 years because of moving to a different country, losing a baby and my being unemployed initially for the whole year but everything's fine..actually way way better now.
So i'm not sure how to approach this issue with her because whenever I've brought this up, she's flat out denied ever having watched porn her entire life, which is fine, I lie or hide a lot of things from her too.
But it's really affecting our sex life as she definitely thinks of sex or making love as a chore now.
Any advice would be helpful to resolve this issue.
How did you find out?
>>16664360
She forgot to clear her browsing history or use incognito mode this once and I just ran across it.
This really piqued my interest so I set up some network monitoring and found that it's alot more serious than i thought
>>16664354
show her the proof, ask her why she didn't come clean? Tell her "Sex with you is starting to feel underwhelming, do you feel like its a chore?"
....????
>fuck her
>>16664379
Eventually, I will do that. That's just how I am.
The thing is I'm afraid by then I might stop caring about her completely and I don't want to do that.
Everytime I try making love, she's afraid it will end up in sex and then she'll have to get up and clean, etc etc..and that always pisses me off and then she apologizes and wants to fuck but I'm almost past all that now.
> she definitely thinks of sex or making love as a chore now.
You're fucked, sorry dude.
How old are you both?
>>16664391
Tell her that you love her with all her bodily fluids.
I would actually confront her in a sexy text. Be a mysterious 'stranger' who writes her the stuff he wants to do with her (things from the type of porn she watches). I use that all the time on my women, gets them really wet long before they meet up with me. Written words are powerful. You don't need to bring up an issue in order to change it.
Fuck her so hard she goes retarded.
Firstly, isn't a big issue after all.
Just tell her seriuosly that you know about it and talk like adults as you are. Seven years on your back, you guys can handle this...
>>16664424
You want me to go to the extra step of getting a new phone number and making sure it stays hidden from her and send her texts?
As mentioned, we already do the things that she watches porn of.
>>16664456
I am all for it but I'm afraid after that she might still do it but maybe make it even harder for me to find out if she's still watching?
And here's the other thing, she watch porn of people eating pussy but she won't let me do that, I just can't understand that. Most of the times I just do it anyway but why does she try stopping me anyway?
She's mentally cheating on you. Kill her now!
>>16664466
Why do you care she's watching porn?
I think its strange that she is denying it, but there's nothing wrong with watching some porn when in a relationship. Masturbation doesn't have to have anything to do with your partner. Applies for men and women
>>16664487
And I'm fine with that, Ive watched plenty porn too but I don't let it affect our relationship, when and if she wants to make love, I don't think of it as a chore and I certainly don't lie to her about watching porn.
She knows full well that I used to watch porn
>>16664391
girlfriend squirts... she does it nearly 3-4 times every time and it start within the first minute bro.. I understand the mess thing. I realized you just have to fuck her so good she doesn't even care about the mess
>>16664486
Because i believe its affecting our relationship? I dont care she can if she wants to as long as she doesnt tell me that sex is a chore now? Or tells me that she actually is doing it without flat out denying about it?
>>16664502
And you know in the end thats what usually happens, she doesnt care.
But her complaining about it initially just makes my dick shrivel and makes me feel like a fool in love
>>16664508
Taking away porn won't make her want to sleep with you more. If you're relationship is actually that bad then all that's going to happen is she's going to seek out other men to satisfy her.
>>16664502
Just make her clean up the mess she created. Or not. My house is a mess, anyway. Let it dry up or like fall when walking. Fun!
>>16664520
I disagree, porn sets unrealistic expectations.
Also, when I was hooked on porn, I never cared much about sex as I would've already masturbated with a lot less hassle
>>16664529
You're just being insecure. If that were true shouldn't TV and the starue of David be inherently bad for the same reason exclusively?
OP here
So the general advice seems to be that I should confront her and just talk this issue out with her?
>>16664583
That's the general advice for everything
You have to fuck her harder and arouse her more. More grabbing, more foreplay. She feels unloved and so sex becomes a chore she needs to do. She'll be like let's get it over with. You'll be like: I don't even want it anymore and everything will go downhill. How did the baby die?
>>16664572
If that were true, heh... wouldn't it depend on the content. So yes and no.
>>16664461
No, idiot. Just write her in a different style from what you usually do.
Make the relationship more exciting for her. It will make her a better fuck. You telling her that you bet she's more into porn than she likes to admit, is something that should come naturally, as you got you cock up in her.
>>16664610
Women are afraid to perceived as sluts, so this makes sense.
>>16664615
That's why it becomes our job to make them let their guard down by telling them how incredibly hot they are when they just let loose and allow their desire to take hold. I will tell women that I think it's good that they're that in touch with their own sexuality. All they need is a little push, and we'll get to do more of the things they claim not to be into.
>>16664632
It's a win-win. High-five buddy!
>>16664470
You are not good at it yet pressuring her to enjoy it and to cum, because you are so noble to perform it for her. That is a real turn-off. Look up tips on how to get better.
>>16664500
How is porn affecting your relationship? Are you just disappointed that she doesn't act the same as the women in the porn she watches?
>>16664502
So she is pissing? Tell her to piss a half hour before or something.
http://www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/women-squirting-during-sex-may-actually-be-peeing
>>16664391
Then why can't you just help her clean up the mess, you horny idiot?
>>16664583
No dude, you are being an entitled dick who's trying to pressure his wife into sex and doesn't even want to talk about her feelings and WHY she is watching the porn. You act as though she is doing something wrong by not giving you enough sexytime. She is not your sexslave.
>>16664583
Do you never watch porn, OP?
I find that difficult to believe, especiallly when you describe that "rough spot."
If sex becomes routine and she isn't mentally stimulated as well as physical, of course she would turn to self-satisfaction.
OP, there's this thing called How To Text Your Wife Into Bed
It's not bad. I wouldn't pay money for it personally, though. But it might be a solution to your predicament. Look it up, there are torrents of it.
Btw, would you consider watching porn with her? My lover once asked me if I wanted to watch porn with her. It was hot as fuck, but I never felt the need to repeat.
Your sex life seems really boring, maybe that's a problem? I mean you said nothing kinky, you must have been having the worlds plainest sex. If it was nothing special maybe it could be easily replaced.
>>16664583
Basically, Like I said before I usually don't mind the mess anymore. fuck her, then let her lay in it. If it bothers you she talks about it just shut her up.
>>16664659
I honestly know about it being diluted pee, but it makes her feel amazing. (She's laying in it for the most part) I don't really get near it besides my dick but whatevs
>>16664354
So, I'm single... But I thought all marriages turned into "sex as a chore" like, after the first few months. Like I thought marriage was for economic stability n raising kids.
>>16664831
Been in my relationship for 6 years.. none of that shit.
>I lie or hide a lot of things from her too.
>she definitely thinks of sex or making love as a chore now
>I set up some network monitoring
>she's afraid it will end up in sex and then she'll have to get up and clean
>I might stop caring about her completely
>make it even harder for me to find out if she's still watching
>Most of the times I just do it anyway but why does she try stopping me
Dude, you guys have a fucking horrible relationship.
See a counsellor or something, this is ridiculous.
It's therapy time if you can't talk this out amongst yourselves like adults and be honest with each other about your sex lives.
There could be an issue of you not getting her off enough and she'll refuse to talk about it to avoid sounding like a hoe.
>>16664831
Been married for almost 5 years, together for 10 years.
We have sex 4 times a week at the minimum, often more. It's not a chore at all. We just keep things spicy. Different areas in the house, many different positions, toy aid, wearing certain clothes, light roleplay, etc.
There is economic stability. We don't have kids yet, but will start trying in the next couple of years.
I married my friend, though. We've known each other since we were children. It may be different if you marry someone you don't share a lot of interests with.
>>16664354
when you're horny, talk to me about it. maybe i won't always be in the mood, but i'd still want to help you feel pleasure
>>16664831
Mine gets kinkier every day.
>>16664831
Been with the same person for nearly 15 years. It only becomes a chore if there are problems that aren't addressed.
>>16664354
Change the sex moves your doing, do things she wouldnt do with you normally for example if she sucked yo dick and she watches deepthroat videos and you dont lick her pussy, slober that shit up, bruh. See where im coming from?
>>16665013
This.
>>16665013
Exactly. For women, sex problems are almost always related to a bigger solution in the relationship.
>>16665047
Indeed. For me, it's always related to stress. I have issues with thinking about everything that needs to be done, when it needs to be done by, how long it's going to take, etc. And if I feel like I'm pulling most of the weight, I'm going to be agitated. It's going to eventually bleed into the relationship. The easiest thing to do, that I've learned, is to just talk about issues as soon as they come up. Just get it all out there. Even if it's something that can't be fixed, or won't be fixed immediately, communicating helps. Not many younger couples seem to be comfortable with this, however.
Honestly, I'd tease my wife and invite her to watch porn with me.
>>16664354
>But it's really affecting our sex life
how do you know, has the sex been shit for 2 years?
>she definitely thinks of sex or making love as a chore now.
no nigga. everybody and their grandma watches porn without loosing interest in real sex. your wife probably just likes to jerk off every now and then
I caught my wife watching porn too. I asked her about it and she denied. So I informed her it's ok, I know about it and that I would like to watch the porn with her. Now we watch porn together and it gets us both in the mood every time.
