So my girlfriend suffers from anxiety disorder. She isn't suicidal, she says, but all day she feels that she wishes "everything" to end. Crying and panic attacks occur daily.
Often when she feels bad, she is reticent, cold and sometimes even rude. No matter what I do or say makes her feel better, she won't seek out her friends, won't start a lifestyle, or come to insight of why she feels this way. I've tried to convince her to go seek professional help, but all she says is that she doesn't have energy enough. When I argue with that, all she says is that I "don't understand". And if I try to make her go, she just gets angry and feels diminished.
I love this girl, but I don't know how she could ever get better. What should I do?
>>16652507
LDR?
>>16652533
What?
>>16652569
Long-distance relationship?
>>16652507
I have anxiety and depression but have seeked help and changed my lifestyle for the better. Anxiety won't go away if she doesn't change her ways, somehow. It just seems like she wants attention from you. I would be careful before dating a girl who enjoys drama. Have you noticed from her behavior if she's the drama type of person?
>>16652591
>>>16652507 (OP) (You)
>I have anxiety and depression but have seeked help and changed my lifestyle for the better. Anxiety won't go away if she doesn't change her ways, somehow. It just seems like she wants attention from you. I would be careful before dating a girl who enjoys drama. Have you noticed from her behavior if she's the drama type of person?
>>16652591
No, she's not
>>16652507
You're fucked, my friend.
People have to change for themselves, on their own. They can seek for guidance from others, but you can't change them.
It seems like your fate's to suffer a lot trying to motivate her in vain.
>>16652602
this. generally speaking if someone is not in reasonable mental health they shouldnt be dating. whats the point? i mean its one thing if someone gets there after the fact but you're describing one of those emo teen girls who just wants to hate life.
if they cant handle themselves, tehy cant handle a partner. because it just ends with them ruining everything for hteir partner but they cant be blamed cuz 'i gotz mental problems xD'
>>16652610
And what if you rule out the emo teenager theory, and assume that I'm talking about actual mental problems
>>16652728
>if they cant handle themselves, they cant handle a partner
>because it just ends with them ruining everythign for their partner but they cant be blamed cuz 'i gotz mental problems xD'
seems pretty clear to me. its one thing to be depressed and they can still handle themselves. but if someone has panic attacks daily they arent stable enough to date.
>>16652728
>>16652755
you literally spell out that she is purposely rude and refuses to seek help. what else can you do but let her A) ruin your life or B) leave her?
You can spend your life trying to fix her but she will never change. If she means that much to you then fine, stick around, but you know exactly what will happen in the future, that's why you asked the question imo. You're looking for people to tell you "get out" so you can justify it to yourself. You are in a relationship for your mutual benefit. If you're not getting anything out of it and you've done your part, you don't owe them anything more. If you want to be happy, you will probably have to leave her, as much as it hurts.
>>16652728
I've known girls with anxiety/depression who are goddamn impossible to be around. Whining and moping all day erry day then blaming everyone around them for not wanting to be around then, all the while refusing to do anything about it
Idk OP, if you can handle how she acts daily for the rest of your life go for it. Doubt its going to get any better, even if she does manage to seek help
Maybe she'll at some point in her life find the motivation and required mindset to try and improve things for herself, but no one is ever going to be able to convince her otherwise until she comes to that realisation for herself. It's often unfortunately how it is with people who are a little lacking in insight and perspective on their own condition.
And like others have said in this thread, someone with her level of mental instabilities shouldn't be dating in the first place, not until she starts feeling a little better. Not sure what you can do man. Either try and tough it out, come to some sort of compromise or move on.
