>Be me
>22
>Mates with a dude
>Call him A
>Used to work with A, get along well with him, catch up from time to time
>A has a 15 year old sister
>I'll say it outright. She does not fucking look 15. She could pass as at least 18 from the way she acts/looks/talks. Was shocked when I found out her age
>She's really into music, A tells her I'm really into music and she should talk to me for recs
>Fast forward a couple of months, she's still messaging me / talking to me when she sees me
>Always careful not to do anything untoward. No flirting, sometimes take a few days to reply to her, never alone with her, etc
>Find out off mutual friend that she apparently has a huge crush on me
How the fuck am I meant to handle this? I don't know if A suspects or knows, and I don't want him to think I'm doing anything untoward to his little sis. Do I ignore it and carry on treating her like I'm oblivious to this? Do I go to an effort to cut contact with her? Do I confront her or A about it? Like I said, she doesn't look 15, and it pains me to admit it, but if she was older I might ask A's permission to date her, but as it stands, the fact she has a stupid teenage crush on me makes me feel anxious as fuck that I'm going to do something that's misinterpreted by her or other people as inappropriate and I'll get pegged for it.
Pic isn't her but who's going to complain if I use a cutie as the thumbnail?
>>16642024
Act oblivious. I wouldn't suggest telling her brother because he might talk to her about it, so just act as if you have no idea what's going on.
>>16642038
I've only got brothers, so I'm kind of at a loss when it comes to shit like this, but do these teenage crushes last very long? I'm assuming it's fairly common for them to crush on older dudes? Is there any risk of her actually trying something on me, or is it just a stupid short term flighty thing?
Okay I'm going to give you two sets of advice.
1. Fuck her:
Hold off until she is 16 though. Treat her with respect and go at her pace. Chances are you would be her first sexual experience, make it a positive one. Make sure she understands that there is still a great deal of stigma around the age gap, and that the two of you would have to wait until she's 18 to be open about it.
2. Don't fuck her:
Don't confront A, as there's a chance he will embarrass his sister. If you have to, just let him know that you and her talk and that you have zero intention of hooking up with her- but remind him not to bring this up at all with his sister, for the sake of her dignity.
Keep things platonic with her and put a bit of space between you and her e.g shorter texts, longer response times and generally tell her you're too busy- all of which you're doing so she should lose interest when a guy her own age comes along.
>>16642054
Also I'm your age and have something with a 16 year old. I'm pretty surprised at her past experiences, I mean guys at 16 really do treat girls like shit. I don't blame them for wanting mature boyfriends. Either way this girl does look up to you, you have some level of impact upon her, remember that.
>>16642066
Fucking degenerate
>>16642024
she probably isn't serious about you, girls just flirt aimlessly
and dude she's like 7 years younger, people would talk so much shit about you m8
>>16642084
Read my post. I've already said I'm not going for her. I'm not a fucking creeper. I just want advice on how to handle this the most appropriate way so as to preserve my friendship with A, her feelings, and most importantly, absolve me of any potential wrongdoing.
I used to get crushes on my big brother's friends all the time. Just don't do anything about it. Ignore it. It'll go away on its own eventually. Crushes are generally fleeting.
>>16642092
Waxes on and on about girl's looking older than 16, her liking music......
>oh, but I'm not going for her
>>16642092
You are an arse hole either way: either you have sex with her and get judged by pricks wouldn't even have a chance with her.
Or you completely cut contact with her, give her the cold shoulder and have her dislike you. She's fucking 15 and you thought it was okay to give her your contacts? You say you're not a creeper but then you go an do shit like that? I don't care if she needed your contacts, you knew exactly what she was doing.
Cut contact now, don't lead her on. Fuck trying to preserve your character, people will understand.
>>16642103
>Not realizing you can be objective and honest about other peoples' physical attractiveness while refusing to pursue them romantically or sexually for any number of social, cultural, interpersonal, emotional, or intellectual factors.
Grow up mang.
>>16642109
Dude your primary reason for not wanting to take things further is because of what other people will say. Understandable in this case, but is what others will think going to dictate every choice of your life?
>>16642117
Nowhere close. I'm just not so desperate to get laid that I'm going to take advantage of someone who is still legally a child and betray the trust of one of my friends, in the same way that I'm not going to fuck my mate's girlfriend even though I'm physically attracted to her. For the same reason I wouldn't fuck my cousin even though I can look at her and freely admit she's quite physically attractive. Ethical and moral issues here extend further beyond "What other people say"
>>16642118
So if you've made no assumptions from it, what's the problem? Crushes pass and are fairly weak, why are you getting so anxious about this?
Keep going on with your relationship with her, nothing bad will happen.
I've just been reading this thread and I just need something clarified. Are you worried that she'll get the wrong idea and do something putting you into and awkward situation or are you worried that you will do something- like when you're drunk.
>>16642143
Definitely the first and not the second.
It's a crush and those pass. You want to have sex with her, and that makes you feel anxious because of obvious social stigma, laws and potential damage to various relationships. You know what you should do? Nothing. Just carry on as usual, get a girlfriend even. This isn't anything, don't go making it a thing.
>>16642152
We'll then don't ever get into a situation where she can make a move. Don't give her a lift home without someone with you. Take her off Snapchat, if you have her on it. Never text her/talk to her when either of you are drunk. Avoid late night contact.
Don't be alone in a room together and have a physical distance of at least 2 meters. Lastly, as one guy on here has said: get a girlfriend. That will keep her off and stop you from overthinking this whole thing.
