I feel like a horrible person.
This past summer I went through a shitty breakup after my girlfriend cheated on me with a guy she worked with. I was fucked up for a while but started gradually getting my shit together and keeping myself busy.
I recently started seeing another girl, and she may be the sweetest, most thoughtful person I've ever met. She's got her shit together and we get on very well, and for some reason she really seems to like me.
But I still find myself stewing over my ex. I don't miss her per se, but I'm still very angry about the way things ended. I never got a chance to get any kind of closure and I didn't deserve for her to do what she did to me. It makes me feel terrible because I shouldn't be thinking about an ex while I'm seeing another girl.
Can I just wait this shit out or do I need to take other steps to fix this? I don't want to think about her anymore. To be honest, she was (and likely still is) a pretty shitty person with no real ambition and I feel like I shouldn't even care anymore.
Don't feel terrible. You are not s horrible person. Your feelings are very normal and understandable. It's not like you're lusting after your ex (which WOULD definitely be inappropriate) you're just having trouble getting over how shitty she was to you.
Have you spoken to your current girlfriend about what happened with your ex, about these feelings you have about the situation? I bet she'd be a great shoulder to lean on.
This goes two ways: 1. you continue to keep ties cut with your girlfriend and hope these angry feelings go away over time. 2.You, after talking about it with your girlfriend, talk to your ex one last time to get some answers and closure. This has the added bonus of giving you the opportunity to rub your awesome new relationship in your bitch ex's face.
Your feelings are real man. You gotta have em.
My advice to you: find someone who you CAN talk to about the situation with your ex. Lowest tier: journaling, writing. Low tier: trusted friend. Higher tier: professional counselors.
Whether or not you should mention it to your current? Eh, I'd advise against that unless she's super mature and understanding. Human beings get jealous over silly stuff, it's normal.
You don't need "closure" with your ex, you need to be able to put your feelings into words in depth, explore and experience those feelings, and then get used to them.
>>16639840
I'm afraid to bring it up because our relationship is still very new.
>>16639809
You clueless guys need to learn that a girl cheats on you because of something YOU did or didn't do or aren't doing.
Basically you caused her to cheat. For whatever reason.
>>16640591
This post is bullshit. Men cheat and women cheat. Every instance is for a different reason. Sometimes there are a lot of pent up emotions involved. Other times the cheater is just careless or selfish. There's no way to put a blanket reason over every relationship this had cheating involved.
>>16640591
Trolling is supposed to be subtle.
>>16640591
I feel like 95% of cheating is just about banging a different person for a change
OP, I don't really know if you're being honest and you really don't have any feelings for your ex apart from anger and a unsolved feeling of injustice, but my advice to you is that either you msg her and vent the fuck out and then block her forever or just directly block (or keep her so if you've already done it) her.
Trust me, those feelings will dissipate with time.
>>16640752
I've blocked her on virtually all forms of communication.
>>16640578
Please do it
If your girlfriend loves you, she'll listen. It is a proof of trust to tell him. Do not lie to your girlfriend.
The key of a couple is communication.
>>16639809
You could ask for closure
That might work.
>>16640591
Most dumb statement ever
>>16642087
Bump
