Ok /adv/isors, tell me what to do.
>meet this girl
>hit it off immediately
>go on a few dates
>have a few moments of emotional connection
>people tell us we're already a couple beacuse our bantering has become a kind of 'secret language'
>she gets a boyfriend at some point after all that
>I don't find out he exists until later because she never tells me, but our relationship doesn't change
>still hang out, still flirt and tease each other
But it looks like she's broken up with her boyfriend tonight. She is away visiting family at the moment, so he or she must have done it half assedly over the phone. Should I send her a flirty message or snapchat to raise a flag that says "I'm here"? I'm not supposed to know that she broke up with him, a mutual female friend just told me. I love this woman and would do anything for her, and from what I can tell, she genuinely likes me back. What should I do to bring her to me now that she is single as of tonight?
She knows you are there dude.
You are the guy who exists in her life to prop up her ego.
If what you want is a relationship you need to tell her thats she either gets that or nothing.
Real talk.
>>16627950
Thanks for being real. You probably just saved me from falling into the friendzone. How should I go about "telling" her? In-person sounds ideal to me, so should I take her out and tell her or what? Do it after a date so her opinion of me is good?
>>16627974
Whatever you think it's best. Not that anon, but I think you shouldn't beat around the bush with it, there's never a perfect moment. Just good moments and you'll still have to take the leap. Think strongly about what it is you want and when you talk to her be honest about it, but the way you say things can have a good impact on how it turns out, so be sure to bring your A game. Might sound a bit contradicting to be honest and try to impress her at the same time... but hey just try to say the things you want to say in the most charismatic and convincing way you can come up with.
Eh, with time I think you two will end up together either way. Just be with her and show interest in her and as long as she shows interest in you as well you'll be all right. Doubt there's any need to push her.
You could try using your information for your favour if you want though. Maybe she'll be a bit down, ask her if something is wrong or state that she doesn't seem like herself if she doesn't respond like she normally would or if she goes silent for a period of time. It'll be a lot easier for you to look for such signs with what you know. Maybe she'll feel like you really understand her when you catch things like that without her even saying anything about it.
Or maybe she's happy about the breakup. I don't know. Observe and play your cards, mate.
>>16627974
Text her something like
"Hey, Im going to go to X place over the weekend, come with me. When are you free?"
Just like that, lets break it down.
Hey:
Hi
Im going to go to X place over the weekend:
Ive got my own shit to do thats fun because I have my life together that Im happy to do with or without you.
come with me:
This is a question obviously but its confident and masculine.
When are you free?:
Gives her freedom to find time. Leaves her with only 2 choices, she either wants to come and will find time, or she declines and at this point you should get the message, amirite?
Then when you get to wherever it is (the bar after the performance you see, the club you meet her at, the cafe you on the beach you wanted to have breakfast at, the beach you wanted to swim at, the party you are at etc)
You just say, "look anon I think your a cutie and Im not cool with us just being friends, thats not what im here, so lay one on me or lets just move on".
This says that you are making the decision for you not for her, because you are a string dude who can make tough decisions and you have enough self respect to not tag yourself along. It also shows that you have enough other options to move onto them.
If she isnt down for it you just say that your sorry and that you hope she finds the right guy for her.
then you
Move
the
Fuck
On.
Or you slay her that evening.
Godspeed.
>>16627998
Interesting. She never told me about her boyfriend at all while they were dating even when we hung out. But she did tell her boyfriend when we did see each other. I fear this is because she didn't want to see me in a romantic light. If I can be the one for her to tell any pent up feelings she has about the break up, I may be able to change that opinion.
>>16627990
Thank you for the advice.
>>16628010
You say you;re sorry that you guys arent meant for each other, not that your sorry for telling her to kiss you.
>>16628017
>If I can be the one for her to tell any pent up feelings she has about the break up, I may be able to change that opinion.
No. A self respecting man isnt an emotional tampon.
No.
If she tells you its insensitive to ask her so soon you just say thats cool, she can text you any time she wants to go get breakfast if she changes her mind.
Then you move on and its up to her.
>>16628010
Thanks, I like this a lot. As >>16627990 said, I need to start acting like I want her, rather than as a friend/brother which is how I fear I have been acting
