Has anyone here ever cut off all ties with their family?
My family is pretty toxic. Not in the hyper abusive, shouty ugly way but in a drag you down, emotionally unavailable, manipulative way. I realize that a lot of families are like that and most people "deal with it" but since I moved far, far away and started talking with them less and less, I've become a much healthier person mentally.
While I love them in a sort of obligatory way, I can't stand needing to keep up with them because it's only ever drama and gloom.Hell, my dad calls twice a week to effectively tell me how disappointed in me he is, followed by him asking when I'm going to come down to visit
part of me just wants to fall off the face of the earth. I'm mostly financially independent, the only thing keeping me from disappearing completely is that my phone is attached to their line and that my mom has my address.
>>16626517
>have the "balls" to "cut ties with family"
>doesn't have the balls to tell them why before actually cutting contact with them after they explode and deny, deny, deny.
>>16626517
You need to give them a serious talking to. As in, tell them explicitly how they make you feel, and that you don't want to talk to them because all they do is make you feel like shit. You'll have a back and forth, things may get resolved, things may get worse, whatever. You won't know until you do it. Based on what happens with that conversation, you navigate your relationship with them accordingly. Just dropping them out of nowhere with no explanation is ridiculous.
>>16626517
if you moved far away, them having your address wont matter much. they could send mail, but thats about it.
if i were you, id just stop answering phone calls. maybe call them once a month, and just always be too busy to visit. this often happens even in loving relationships just becuase its hard to keep parents in your life as you start to create your own.
but thats all it has to be. maybe delete your facebook for awhile so you dont have to deal with them if they comment on you every day there
Cut off all ties? No.
Significantly reduced contact? Yes.
My dad's side of the family is fucking crazy and just makes me miserable. Everything blew up a couple years ago when me and my grandmother (she's very emotionally abusive and a manipulator) got into a huge fight. I didn't come around my dad's side of the family for a year after that. I eventually reconciled with her and started visiting a bit more.
I moved about 1000 miles away a while back, not because of the family issues, different reasons. Now we just call or send an email on holidays and shit. I got to say I feel a lot better with things like this.
>>16626744 This is good advice. Just keep things minimal. It doesn't have to be all or nothing.
>>16626517
I would say go ahead and cut all ties.
Why would you have a relationship with people that give you shit?
It's better to be alone than to be surrounded by people like that.
I'm about to move very far away and in the process cut all ties with my family.
I don't regret it one bit.
The only ones that are saved are people that I love dearly and that love me back. Mom, Dad, and maternal Grandmother.
The rest of the family are extremely toxic people that don't deserve one second of my time.
