I'm the same way. Lurking for advice.

I have a similar relationship with my mother op. the only difference may be that mine will purposely annoy me when she's bored.

In my years of experience I can tell you this, just don't give a damn. Think about how you want to spend your day before you blow up in her face. Do you want to have a chill day and not bicker about anything? Or would you rather spend the day with both of you being miserable?

It's a matter of choosing your battles.

>>16623756
>How do I be more patient?

By getting older than thirteen...
Seriously. I can't stand my mother either, but she's still family! So suck it up and treat her with the minimal amount of respect she deserves.

>>16623756
You're just tsundere for her.

>>16623783
I'm 22. It's not like I'm being an edgelord. As I said before, she's ridiculous and immature, which may be why it's so hard for me to respect her. Nothing would make me respect her (unless she somehow changed her fundamental personality), but I want to stop being a dick to her.

>>16623797
>she's ridiculous and immature
And hating your mummy isn't?

>but I want to stop being a dick to her
Then stop being one! All know the way, few actually walk it...

>>16623827
>>16623783
I'm not OP, but trust me, you guys aren't fucking getting it.

I'm 21, basically exact same situation as OP.

>>16623827
Try to imagine if you were considerably healthy for your life, and then one day you thought you were alone and ate some pasta. Your mother happened to see you and so for the next few years she complains that you eat too much carbohydrates and are killing yourself, even at the most random of times, times when you aren't even eating. She just pulls it out of nowhere. Meanwhile you're trying to get a STEM degree at an Ivy League school while working a job on the side and she's complaining she won't help pay tuition because she doesn't think you eat enough salad, even though that's all you eat. And then when you calmly try to say that you eat very healthily and are in excellent shape, that even the doctor says so, she says "The doctor must be lying. I've seen you eat carbs before. Don't you dare contradict me. If you try to insinuate that I'm lying one more time, I'm not contributing a penny to your tuition and you can come home immediately." Meanwhile my dad worked from nothing to be very rich in a well-known software company and my mother spends all his money on useless shit and turns her 3 story-house into an unlivable mess while constantly yelling at my father, because anyone who "contradicts her" is a "negative person who is just trying to hurt me," etc.
But the salad thing is just an example of 10 or so things that are all so petty they drive me insane because none of them are true. And it has nothing to do with me being a dick or anything to her. All I can do is remember to myself "this woman has problems. Don't take her seriously when she says your relationship is a sham and you are the embarrassment. Just keep doing what you're doing, you'll make enough money one day to get out of here. Just try to ignore it. Just try to get her to help with tuition until one day you don't need it and try not to shout back."

>>16623797
Has it gotten to the point where you're a dick to her because it's the status quo?

>>16623873
No. I do make conscious efforts to be nice and try not to get annoyed, but I get worn down really, really quickly. I immediately regret it, and the cycle restarts.

>>16623873
It's like I'm trying my best 24/7 not to be a dick, but then she says something and I gradually forget and start to raise my voice, to which she loses her shit and tantrums like a child. Complain to my father and he says "have thicker skin. Stop taking her words so seriously. She doesn't mean it when she talks like that" even though my words get taken extremely seriously.

>>16623880
This is another way to describe what I mean. Absolutely this.

But it's been going on since I was a little kid. Like every day for 14 years or so is a stressful nightmare, the only upside being that now when I'm at work or something I can handle stressful situations extremely calmly. But it's still pretty bad.

>>16623756
>ridiculous woman and has the mental maturity of a 10-year-old
My mother is the same
I just stay quiet. Don't give her an attitude or anything.I just do what she asks and don't talk to her about anything.
I just stay mute when i'm around her.

>>16625306
What do you do when she starts making up stuff like "you're not talking so you must be manipulating me" and then says things like "respond or I'm not going to add any more to your tuition" which is 30k a semester, and I cannot pay despite working while being a student. And it's not that she takes it away, it's that she constantly threatens to until she gets a reaction out of me.

My father says his mother was annoying as fuck and they didn't get along very well.

But he says one of his biggest regrets in lide was not spending enough time with her and not being more patient.

Your mother may be a pain Op but you're the only person she has and she surely loves and values you a lot, even if she doesn't know how to demonstrate it.
When death eventually comes you'll no longer be able to say what you want to say and do what you want to do with your mother.

>in lide

Sorry, i meant in life.

>>16625341
This was my first thought; I was an absolute shit to my mom for much of my youth, sometimes with some justification, and man do I ever regret it now.

But it really does sound like OP's mother is a piece of work. I'm not saying she's obligated to pay for his tuition, but using that as a threat is ... really low.

>>16623756
Jorge If this is you, Get The FUCK OFF of 4chan. If it is you I will personally KICK YOUR ASS!

>>16625346
It's not fucking that. My father pays for everything, my mother takes care of my siblings.

But it was growing up with the constant threat hanging around that my parents are going to divorce but never did. Constantly with this shit.

Everytime I'm in a relationship or anything it becomes "YOU WOULDN'T TALK TO __ THIS WAY. TALK TO ME LIKE I'M HER. PRETEND I'M HER." My father constantly shouts with her back and forth so I can never sleep. He's called her a fucking bitch and shouted at her plenty of times while I was growing up but will take her side on literally every issue because it's easier for him to shout at me than to deal with his wife.

>She is a ridiculous woman and has the mental maturity of a 10-year-old

>get annoyed pretty much the moment she talks

So are you.

>>16625357
Please don't think I'm insinuating that this is about money. That's a petty and manipulative thing to say to someone regardless of whether the thread is empty or not.

Treat her like a child. You'll be surprised how patient and caring you can be. You're just expecting too much of her right now, as a mother, as an old adult, as a woman etc. When you treat her as a child, you lose all of that expectation and you're just with her for who she is, as she is.

>>16625349
Mfw I know someone named Jorge?!

>>16623866
Me too

I wish i could hit her
my plan is to simply move far away as soon as i can

Woman are like retarded backstabing chimps

>>16623756
That's your mom doing what she does best, get over it and move out when you can