>>16622773

first and foremost, yes you are right that there is nothing wrong with what you are doing. you do not exist to cater to your girlfriend, you are not her siamese twin, you can hang out with your friends all she wants. if she doesnt have anything to do for 10 hours a fucking month then she needs to reflect on that herself, either by getting more friends or a simple hobby to keep her busy.

all that being said, there is no 'acceptable'. its all between you and your partner. there isnt a go to, or a 'general idea' or a consensus.

i hung out with my best friend every freaking day, and he really only his his gf in the evenings, and even then i was around a lot.

she hated this, made him cut ties with not just me, but all of his friends, and i only ever saw him once after that. fun fact, they were engaged, and yet after she made him drop us from his life, the wedding fell through.

moral is, your friends and family will generally see you through thick and thin. most of those relationships 'fade out'. you shouldnt put too much investment in a romantic relationship, because those tend to end with a bang, and if you cut off all your friends, you'll have nothing left.

personal feelings aside, reign her in, explain that its normal and healthy to hang out with friends.

I have been with my bf for 7 years, have been living together for 4 1/2. I'm 23, he's 25.

We go out at least once a week alone with our own friends and on Friday we go out together with mine or his friends. We often have people over for lunch or dinner and sometimes they sleep here.

Keep hanging out with your friends and family, and have your own life outside your relationship. Your girlfriend is being unreasonable. If you still spend a LOT of time with her, having time for yourself and people you love is necessary.

Something I probably should've mentioned is that she has no friends or family. I think this makes her bothered that I'm able to indulge in thing she wishes she could do, but is unable.

Basically whenever I hang with friends it reminds her she doesn't have any. That's my theory, anyway. I think she'd care less about me spending time with my own if she had some.

And I will never give up my friends, not that they are more important than her, but the principle of being able to keep something that makes me happy in my life should be acknowledged by someone who cares about me. I won't sacrifice that for anyone.

>>16622959
Maybe try to do some activity together that will help her making some friends? Like some sort of hobby, class, sport or social activity.

Holy shit. I literally can't imagine what kind of person would get pissy about one night with friends every TWO WEEKS. Do you spend basically every other evening with her?

Sorry, there's no defense for that. She's being unreasonable. Wildly so. That's all there is to it.

>>16622959

consider having a night where your friends all bring their girlfriends. then have her make friends with them. men go do men things, girls go do girl things.

pressure a friend to pressure a gf into inviting her to hangout outside of that afterward.

on top of that you can just encourage other activities. even if she doesnt want to make friends she can find hobbies so when you say 'going to friends' she can be like 'finally, now i can finish editing that video' or whatever.

>>16622968
We do those types of things, she just hasn't met the right people to mesh with. Making friends after college is pretty difficult, especially since she works from home.

All my friends I made in either high school or college. Its easy when you have contact and are around them every single day. If you only see people like once a week, its harder to form any kind of bond strong enough to transition to hanging out one on one. Just my 2 cents. Unfortunately, I think the ship has sailed for her.

>>16622989

you are mostly right thats true, but the ship hasnt sailed. there are people out there looking to make friends, your gf is by no means unique. this forum gets at least 10 'how do i make friends?' posts a day.

it is easier to develop those bonds in a school or job, but plenty of people make friends other ways. its a slow burn but she has nothing but time.

and there is of course the option of getting a friends gf to get her started.

>>16622981

She's actually been getting better about, to the point where she hardly complains. Its just if I do it back to back, I get the whole "You JUST saw them last week" response.

I'm 27, my friends are in their late 20's, and one is 30. From my experience, friendships are fragile and life can easily get in the way and cause them to fall apart (family, jobs, etc.). That's why I try to make the most of my time with them before that shit happens.

>>16623020

i dont blame you, i like to see my friends at least once a week. you need to help your gf find her center cuz the point of your life is not to cater to hers. its not just this, but you should be able to enjoy a personal hobby or personal time. you are living together but you are not siamese twins.

trust me when i say romance is far more fragile than friendships. you arent wrong about how things can easily get in the way.

but friendships tend to fade out. they are easier to revive or at least reconnect over down the road.

relationships tend to crash and burn, leaving nothing to be salvaged.

etiher way, stick with ur friends.

>>16622989

I know it's not easy, but it's surely possible.
You don't have necessarily to hang out one on one right away, but maybe if you start hanging out together after doing the activity and she "clicks" with someone, they could go out together alone after a while.
Try to encourage her.