I am a 22 year old girl from Cali doing a 3 month internship in Europe. Is losing my virginity to this guy worth it? He is 20/not a virgin. I have two months prior to leaving. reckon that having sex with him will be a very happy experience that will give me experience. However, I am from a conservative Asian family and my parents will be upset if I lose my virginity to a guy I have no future with. Am also worried about pregnancy and that he only wants me for sex.
>>16616031
Do it.
>>16616031
Losing your virginity to someone you'll never see again. Sounds classy.
Personally, I wouldn't do it.
However, I'd never even contemplate it because that sort of stuff doesn't appeal to me. So we might just be different in that area.
>>16616031
1) not like you'll be telling your parents, so don't worry about them.
2) "he only wants me for sex" - grow up. You only want him for sex, and you're lying to yourself is you say otherwise.
3) worried about stds and pregnancy - you really are a virgin, huh? They're called condoms.
Sorry if I sound rude, but you're focused on some very material things when you're making what is essentially a moral decision. If you value the same traditional conservative beliefs as your parents, then no, you shouldn't fuck him. If you don't, then yeah, go for it.
>>16616031
Why do you care that he only wants you for sex, what more do you want?
>>16616068
I'm worried that guys in met in the future will judge me for this. I know that my parents will.
Should I even tell my parents that I fucked a guy abroad?
It's just sex. Your virginity is worthless.
Just make sure he wears a condom.
>>16616091
It seems "silly" of me to lose my virginity to someone like that
>>16616083
I think pregnancy and STDs are very real concerns. It's not like condoms are some magic device. They are just latex barriers that help REDUCE the risk, not eliminate it. They don't prevent 2% of pregnancies, and they aren't that effective against the transmission of skin-to-skin STDs because those can often exist on areas not covered by the condom.
>>16616068
Sounds like a good idea really. The first time usually isn't that great for most people. So never seeing them again could be a good thing in terms of future awkwardness. By the off chance OP decides to get feelings because "my first" then problem solved by never being able to see them again. Makes it easier to get over them if you're realistic.
Contrary to what I've just said though. I'd advise against OP doing it because the way she laid everything out.
>>16616096
Guys will judge you more positively than negatively if you're a virgin. Especially, it you told them you lost it to some stinky coward Europeon.
The best way to lose your virginity in my opinion is with your partner during a relationship. I waited till I found someone whom I had a really great relationship and conection. I think it's a really great experience over losing with someone strange just for the sake of it. Besides being a virgin is nothing to be ashamed of, I find such trait more appealing than an experienced woman.
>>16616107
>because the way she laid everything ou
How?
>>16616101
>The 2%
2% is the percentage for couples that fuck often after a year of fucking. Actual studies on a "per use" percent don't exist because they would be impossible to do, and you'd need to somehow drop all the data in which sex without a condom wouldn't have resulted in a pregnancy anyways.
Im conservative so Im kinda against the idea of having sex with someone who I dont have a feeling for.
Your post makes me sad somehow desu.
>>16616161
>desu
Implying a post with "desu" in it is reliable
>>16616031
Just fool around and don't let it go further if you don't feel comfortable. Kiss, touch maybe etc
I lost my virginity at 23 but it was with a partner, still; my first thought was 'wish I could've done this sooner, it's great'
Also, don't tell your parents? Jesus, you're 22. They don't need to know about your sex life.
>>16616154
Like, she doesn't really sound enthusiastic about it: "it will be a happy experience that will give me experience," really? Whereas she lists all sorts of reasons not to. She's clearly uncomfortable with it, and just wants it add some kind of idealized European adventure.
>>16616159
The ultimate point is the chance is still there. Whether OP is willing to take it or not is another story.
>>16616154
Mostly the fact that she strongly implied she would tell her parents. It's like she thinks she has to tell them. The same parents she knows would be upset with her...
>>16616190
But the chance is extremely small.
OP here. Will guys in the future judge me for losing my virginity to someone who I have no future with?
>>16616230
Yes. You'll look easy and like a potential one night stand. Enjoy your stigma.
>>16616183
But I can't think of any other positives besides it will be super fun, memoriable, and will give me experience.
>>16616233
This
>>16616230
No, and nobody with half a brain will.
What people will care about though, if you were with MANY guys.
>>16616230
If you are hot, I wouldnt care if I want a good fuck.
But I will stay away from you if I want a wife to raise a family with.
>>16616215
It's still too big to risk something like pregnancy and STDs (especially with a stranger), but that's just me.
>>16616230
Well yeah, of course they'll judge you. It wouldn't be a deal-breaker for most guys, but if a guy wants a loving, committed relationship with you, they'll definitely think less of you for losing it to someone who didn't have that same level of commitment.
Your basically asking if you can slut it up with no consequences, and the answer to that, as a rule, is no. It might be a great experience, and you might never regret doing it, but you'd be lying if you told yourself it's a trivial thing.
>>16616274
Condoms are pretty great vs stds, and if you're really worried about pregnancy you just get a nexplanon. And at that point you may as well start worrying about being in a car accident or getting hit by lightning.
>>16616230
Some will, some won't. You definitely will be narrowing your pool of potential partners.
Personally, I wouldn't have causal sex or lose my virginity outside of a committed relationship, so I would want a partner who is the same.
>>16616281
>Losing your virginity to ONE guy at 20
>Slutting it up
Nigger what the fuck are you talking about
>>16616288
Oh I'm not OP in case I came off that way. Yeah, implants are amazing. Definitely my BC of choice. Condoms really aren't as great as most people seem to think they are.
>>16616292
to a guy that she has no relationship whatsoever with.
>>16616292
Not that anon, but "slutting it up" isn't objective. You two just have different personal definitions and standards.
>>16616310
Slut is defined by a dictionary as:
>a woman who has many casual sexual partners.
>synonyms: promiscuous woman
I'm going to make a logic jump here and say that many means more than 1.
>>16616230
not all of them. in fact, many will understand and not think anything of it.
>>16616230
Depends on the guy. All men are different. Some will think you are an easy slut, some are ok with open relationships, some are ok with swinging and cuckolding ...
>>16616322
See "many" and "promiscuous" aren't objective measures. It's still up to personal beliefs at that point.
Even though to me, pretty much anything outside of a long-term, committed, life-partnership is "promiscuous", I understand a lot of people don't see it the same way.
>>16616322
So having casual sex once is slut behavior, in the same way that not holding an elevator for someone is asshole behavior. Doing it once or twice doesn't make you an asshole, and having casual sex doesn't make you a slut, but if you tell people about either of them they're going to assume it's part of a larger trend.
And again, most guys will look past that and test it add fairly normal, but that doesn't mean it doesn't factor into how they'll view toy.
>>16616031
>>16616099
This times a thousand if you do it, but I still recommend not doing it. A girl I know spent two months in Africa and fucked a guy. Came home pregnant and had the choice of aborting it or raising a little black baby that everyone knows is a bastard. She ended up having the kid due to a lot of different pressures and beliefs and let me tell you, her life is BEYOND fucked. She still has a degree and a job, but just stop and think about her odds of getting a dude to marry her. Some will, but why would men with their shit together bother marrying her when there's tons of others without a kid already that has no father? She might have a happy life with that kid, I hope she does, but she will never have the life that she really wanted.
So let me repeat, OP, getting pregnant from a guy in another country ain't nothin' to fuck with. If that fear doesn't deter your horny little self, then for the love of your asian little family, make sure he uses a condom.
>>16616377
Having casual sex does make you a slut
Its like having gay sex and being like LOL NO HOMO
>>16616418
Is she from the south?
>>16616418
>Went to Africa to begin with
>Fucked an african
>Got pregnant due to carelessness (maybe even aids too because, lol Africa)
>Didn't abort
My fucking sides. How can someone make so many bad decisions.
>>16616274
No it's not. The risk of getting pregnant from one encounter while properly using a condom is so small that it might as well not exist.
>>16616484
that was probably a bait
I see /pol/ and /r9k/ have successfully invaded the thread with their "having more than one sex partner is super slutty" propaganda.
>>16616504
The fact that there's any risk at all makes casual sex an automatic nope for me.
>>16616526
Just get an implant and the chances become the same as being hit by a car/meteorite/murderer/cancer/etc
>>16616543
I'm all for implants. They are the best. It's condoms I'm talking about.
(Although even with an implant, I still wouldn't have casual sex)
>>16616515
It's not. The issue is OP having a relationship with someone she has no future with.
>>16616515
>different opinions must be evil propaganda
Oh you
>>16616526
Fair enough. Since you let statistical improbably rule your life, you'd better buy some lottery tickets, there is a very small chance you'll be super rich!
>>16616562
>mfw people disagree with each other all the time on /adv/
>>16616572
Or be scared of crossing the road as you may be hit by a car :^D
>>16616554
So basically the issue is "is casual sex bad or not."
Op is going to have to decide that herself.
>>16616572
No thanks. I don't gamble :^)
>>16616582
Well, people in this thread seem to think of casual sex as bad
>>16616769
And?
>>16616774
And this is 4chan. If people on 4chan says that casual sex is bad, then it must be really bad.
>>16616031
not really, it will make you seem slutty
the people who tell you to do it may be sluts themselves
Just remember OP, those in this thread who are telling you that having sex will make you a slut and men will not want to marry you are are all angry virgins from /r9k/. Any actual adult couldn't care less if you had a fling in Europe. The only men that you would lose from your potential dating pool are fat basement-dwelling autists.
>>16616968
I'm not sure if you are trolling or not.
People from /r9k/ are losers. It's not like they can be picky with women as most girls do not want them.
The average decent guy can be picky and they will not want a girl who slutted up in Europe.
It's up to you, but I would wait for the right one. Again its your free will and your own choice. No one can choose, but yourself. Things maybe different in the states or America depending where you are from, but we value the quality of a relationship. Not the quantity cause all those bitches and hoes just leave your heart and wallet empty. Nay mean?
Peace out sister!
>>16616994
Where are you from?
>>16616979
>The average decent guy can be picky and they will not want a girl who slutted up in Europe.
You must never have had a relationship. That's simply not true.
>>16617013
Lol you are the one who is making shit up.
Just look at what everyone else in this thread is saying.
Depends what you want out of it.
If your never gonna see him again your parents wont ever meet him and want to know what fucking is like sweet, just make sure you use a condom.
Or you could wait stick to your values, and wait its your choice.
Making love with someone you have deep feelings for is really really great.
That being said I passed up fucking a really hot chick as my 1st cos I was scared shitless about sex when In was younger , when I did get the chance again it was someone less than good looking or even an attractive personality and regret not taking option 1
But choice is yours, and remember this is your life not your parents.
Hope that helped
>>16616031
From what I hear your first time won't be great but you will probably remember it for a long time. Just make sure it's a memory you don't regret I guess.
>>16616100
>>16616096
>>16616230
Posts like this make me think that you shouldn't. You're trading temporary fun(that isn't that great because virgin) for long-term consequences.
>>16617048
Well yeah. There seems to be "risks" to it.
>>16616031
Just give him a blowjob
>>16617057
I didn't quote any of the std scare posts. Just wanted to point out that OP seems to be a person that might care about this stuff. Some people are chill and just want to have fun and some people take life more seriously. OP seems to lean towards the latter because she's thinking in the long term. Even her arguments for doing it were "it will be memorable" and "it will give me experience" which are long-term values.
>>16616031
personally i would go for it.
it might have a deadline and you might hurt a little afterwards but to avoid being sad at all costs means not to live life.
you're gonna go through it at some point in life anyways, why not take the chance and be happy in the time you two have left?
the regret of not having tried usually outweighs the potential other bad stuff.
also kek at those calling entering a short term relationship 'slutting it up in europe', get your head checked.
Ive seen you ask this question on this board a lot the past few days. If you have to ask anonymous strangers this much if you should be having sex the anwser is probably no.
>>16617092
Some people are simply not comfortable with what she's about to do. Other people are. Both are perfectly valid opinions, and neither one implies that someone is "fucked in the head".
Not OP, but I am in a similar situation. Should I ask out a foreign exchange student if I am not interested in losing my virginity to him?
>>16617115
>Some people are simply not comfortable with what she's about to do.
>some people are simply not comfortable with interracial marriage
>some people are simply not comfortable with...
some people are idiots
Laughing out loud on all these comments. Look, nothing holds you back from being a slut except judgement. I would definitely stick to my parent's views (to which why I'm still a virgin at 18). Nothing holds you back from having sex with that guy, OP. But, and pay attention here, nothing holds, guys like me, back from calling you a slut. So, take it with a grain of salt, or an advice.
>>16617147
We're talking about guys she might end up dating. Whether you like it or not, there are guys who will not see her in a good light if she admits to doing that. It's called having a preference. I don't know how that's comparable to interracial marriage.
>>16617152
Basically this. You are under no obligation to tell friends/family/etc. But at some point you're gonna tell the guy you're with (and want to spend the rest of your life with) and he might judge you for it. It's your right to fuck this guy, and it's your future potential bf's right to not be okay with it.
>>16617157
some opinions ('preferences') are meant to be disregarded is all i'm saying.
>>16617166
Sure, that's your opinion to have. All I'm saying is, she's definitely narrowing down the amount of men who want to be with her (and she might want to be with), whether you agree with that or not.
>Ummm... Anon... I really like you. Would you... go out with me?
>That all depends on one thing only, Anonette. Are you a virgin?
>Uh... no... I have been with one guy...
>Slut! Never talk to me again!
Despite what the bitter virgins in this thread tell you, the above would never happen.
>>16617152
Right, I'm sure you're a reeeeeeal catch. She won't be able to date you, the horror!
>>16616031
There's something seriously wrong with the world if you're even considering this. You should only habe sex with someone you love.
>>16617263
The vast majority of guys don't care about virginity, but having sex with a random guy even once can be a dealbreaker.
>>16617306
It's not a random guy though.
>>16617389
He might as well be. She has no future plans with him, she's only in it for sex, and she has known him for a month at best. Sure it's not as bad as a random stranger from a bar, but it's still practically a random guy she wants to fuck.
