Details in short:
Out of the country for holidays.
Girlfriend told me today one of her friends (a guy) is coming to visit tonight and they're going to have dinner.
Didn't get many details as she was distracted with getting ready for work.
My thoughts:
Experiencing some anxiety. Never expected this to happen as I didn't know of any guy friends or who this one is. We've been together for 8 months and have developed a good level of trust.
I'm curious to find out more, but I don't like to pry and especially because we won't have enough quality time before the meeting.
So what do. I think I read too many NTR manga and am expecting some secret one night stand to take place.
>>16607239
They're going to fuck
>>16607241
Come on, man. I don't want to hear that.
>>16607253
If they're going out to eat then it might be fine
But if he's coming to her place he's going to fill her up with christmas cheer
>>16607239
From my point of view there is not much you can do in a situation like this. Girls "are allowed to" have friends of the opposite gender but we all know that it is not "acceptable" for her to go out with this friend. The way I see it she wants something from this person, be it positive attention or perhaps even sex. He does wants sex.
If you tell her that she can't see him or react negatively to this information in any way, you are weak and also in the wrong because she is allowed to do what she wants. If you give her the impression that this is acceptable behavior, she will continue to do it and eventually have sex with other people.
In a situation like this I usually just brush the information off like she told me what she had for dinner that day and go radio silent for what is considered a long period of time. If she brings the date(it is) up in a conversation later on she is doing it to test you, and if she doesn't, I think you can doubt her dedication to you. I'm not saying she wants to have sex with this person, but I am saying that she might be considering it. It is important that you give her the impression that you could not be any more sure about your position as her one and only(without putting this in words), and that you at the same time withdraw your affection to her without this being obvious or hostile. An example of behavior that might do this is not answering her texts for a while and if she asks what's up with that, be like "oh sorry, I've just been so busy having fun with my friends/doing fun stuff lol :)"
TLDR: If she wants to cheat she is going to cheat and there is nothing you can do about it, so you might as well act cool and hope for the best. Do not reward unwanted behavior but do not make an ass of yourself by coming off as insecure either.
>>16607293
And if he doesn't react at all, he doesn't care enough. It depends on the girl and how she interprets it.
>>16607307
Yeah but he does care though, he is giving his time to her on a regular basis. If him not reacting gives her a negative emotion (anxiety, anger, sadness), my theory is that this makes her strive to regain his affection and stop her negative behavior to achieve this. If she figures that him not caring about her meeting some other guy means that she should cheat on him as revenge or whatever, then she is a bitch and he should not waste his time on this relationship anymore and pursue better women.
>>16607332
However you interpret it won't matter, she comes out of it with a new guy. If she is the type to need him to be dominant, then him being chill about it will only turn her off him, like he is weak. Hey, she might not be a cheater, she might just really enjoy his company.
>>16607339
Yes girls will always have it easier on the not being alone-part. And yes she might just enjoy his company. But the company is sexually interested in her and she knows this. "Being dominant" does not equal aggressively confronting her about meeting some other guy, because this comes off as low self-esteem. "Being chill about it" and not giving a fuck on the other hand, will keep her guessing and hopefully come to the conclusion that she is better off staying with him.
An important factor here I think, is that she told him beforehand that she is going to meet some dude. If she was planning to have sex with him she wouldn't have told him this because why the fuck would she. So she is probably "matching" them in some way, testing the waters and checking who is the more worthy of her spread legs.
>>16607293
>An example of behavior that might do this is not answering her texts for a while and if she asks what's up with that, be like "oh sorry, I've just been so busy having fun with my friends/doing fun stuff lol :)"
Holy fuck this, this is first grader bullshit, I literally only accept this advice if you are 17 or younger and even then you would be that type of motherfucker who would be shunned for stupid passive aggressive pseudo aplha male shit. Consider never giving advice at all, not even to your 15 year old sister.
>>16607239
Here's the deal, anon. You sound like you never had any platonic female "training partner". Like someone off the opposite gender you hung out with without any thoughts of sex. Probably not even a female sibling. Otherwise you'd see that you are kinda paranoid as fuck, since women can have male buddies. If she wanted to fuck that guy on the low, she would have done so without telling you about his existence. Would have made this "secret one night stand" a lot more secret. Instead She opted to share this part of her daily life with you since she wants you to take part. You can ask about where the two met, if they have been friends for a long time. Same questions you would ask if it were a female friend. Maybe it will ease your mind. You seem however kinda scared that this guy is a threat and I feel some history:
Was she unfaithful in the past and are you afraid of a repetition? If no, chill the fuck out.
>>16607361
>>16607339
>>16607293
>>16607241
> SHE'S GONNA FUCK THAT GUY, the echochamber
Holy shit, this is some bizarro world advice from a universe were all men are socially awkward and all women sex driven succubi.
Some "advice", guys.
At least it's comical as fuck.
>>16607383
>>16607404
The women have arrived to defend their attention-seeking behaviours. Don't listen to them OP, she IS going to fuck that guy.
>>16607415
OP at least you can die in peace knowing that none of the people posting in this thread are fucking your GF.
Cause I know a perma virgin when I see one.
In all seriousness, approach this rationally and logically. Don't listen to the cacophony of shitposters. Talk it out. Communication is key. Good luck for you two!
>>16607605
Yes talk to her about how you are feeling insecure that she is hanging out with someone else! Listen to this anon!
If she was going to cheat on you, she wouldn't have told you he was coming over at all.
OP here. Thanks for the help and laughs.
Also, even if she told me, it doesn't mean something won't happen.
Well, fuck. Still a bit stressed, but all I can do is deal with it if I don't want to seem like a pussy. I'll talk to her about it tonight (or nighttime there). If I don't get a response, then that'll be a bad sign.
