How do you build self-esteem when you're fuck ugly, not smart and not likely to ever achieve anything noteworthy?
delusionally
>>16605963
There must be something you're good at.
develope a good pesonality.. everybody will be ugly when they come to 40-50 and that is the only thing that remains. And many people unerestimate it even when they are young. Ex : I find good looking people with a horrible personality some how very ugly and vice versa..
but if that already is the case maybe exercise and developing a good body
>>16605966
Where do you even start that sort of a delusion? I've been raised to look down on delusional people, and that sort of pride doesn't even offer the comfort of smugness. "I am trash, you are are trash, but unlike you I'm honest about it" isn't something to build delusion on.
>>16605968
Nothing that'd make other people think I'm an exceptionally great and adorable human being.
>>16605977
My body is as good as I can make it (nor being an athlete or anything).
What kind of a personality should I have?
>>16605963
Women in general doesn't dislike ugly men. What they do dislike however is men that don't take care of their appearance.
>>16606000
It's all about attitude. If you keep repeating that you don't have any talent/you're ugly you'll eventually become that. It works the same way if you start believing you're worthy.
Besides, being successfull/good looking and all that stuff is only social shit. You need to ask to yourself: are you trying to prove this to anyone? If so, why don't you start proving it to yourself?
Fuck what everyone else is doing or thinking as long as you're keeping a cool attitude!
>>16606018
I don't actually care about women, I have no problem with them. I just have problems with other things I couldn't connect to having bad self-esteem before other people pointed them out or drew the lines.
>>16606038
No amount of telling myself I'm awesome will make me go down in history.
>>16606085
You said building self-esteem, not be the next Bill Gates.. So are you simply trying to build self-esteem? Or you wanna make it big?
>>16606192
Considering that I won't be the next Michelangelo, Frida Kahlo or Theodore Roosevelt, I suppose I'd settle to being content with being worthless without feeling worthless.
>>16606221
Just do a job the best you can do and try to be a decent person. Most people, by definition, will never achieve greatness.
Honestly, if you manage to give the world half as much as you took from it, you are doing better than a lot of people.
>>16605963
You don't. There are plenty of reasons why people will tell you otherwise, but it's a load of shit.
>>16606297
>Most people, by definition, will never achieve greatness.
But how do I live with that?
I don't want to be worthless. I hate how it makes me feel.
>>16606314
Either enjoy life doing things you like, or spent years researching for new technology and invention that can be life-changing and have people remember your name.
>>16606314
There isn't some magical fucking answer. You are either trash or you aren't. If you are trash, you will feel bad about it and get neglected.
>>16606330
So there's no hope to begin with? I'll just never be happy or be able to value myself as a human being equal to others?
>>16606359
As far as I am concerned, yes. Your best bet is to try to make something of yourself.
>>16605963
>How do you build self-esteem when you're fuck ugly,
You do the best you can with what you have, and accept that this has to be enough. If there is well and truly nothing more you can do about your body, then focus your efforts on wearing things that flatter it.
>not smart
Either you haven't found the things that come naturally to you yet, or you don't give yourself credit for them. Find (or accept) them, and start working on how you might be able to leverage them to learn other things.
This is what smart people do. They figured it out sooner, and so they have a lot of practice with it, but you can still start the process. It will still help.
>and not likely to ever achieve anything noteworthy?
Neither is almost everyone else, and the ones who think they're destined for greatness are hit the hardest by it.
>>16606374
What kind of things would you suggest? I can't math, I'm aggressively, passionately uninterested in physics or biology, so practicing medicine or real sciences is not an option.
I have no real education in anything so I'm too old to compete in anything you have to start training for before the age of 21.
What IS there out there that I could do that absolutely everyone wouldn't have had a headstart in?
>>16606402
It's not a competition, faggot. You can learning whatever you want right now and if you do it everyday you'll be infinitely better than everyone else who doesn't do it. It's hard to be the best but it's easy to be better than 90% of the population.
>>16606508
>not a competition
Oh u.
>>16606508
>It's not a competition, faggot.
But of course it is. It absolutely is.
What's the point of doing anything if not impressing people?
I gues you're a guy, and in that case I have tood news for you:
>girls mostly don't give a ratsfuckingshitass if a guy is ugly. as long as he is genuine.
>>>> >genuine< <<<<
that's what almost all women look for. for all types they're looking for different kind of men, but what is a constant, is that they want a nice, confident guy that is genuienly a good, kind person.
and if you're trying to impress people, it will look like insecurity, even if you arn't insecure. do it to impress yourself.
you'll get there, your problem isn't that difficalt to fix if you know how
You can develop skills to offset most natural imbalances.
Groom yourself properly and spend time on something you want to learn. It's nearly impossible that you don't have the capacity for self-improvement if you actually try.
>>16606565
I'm gay.
What most guys are looking for is a cheap casual fuck with someone they never have to look at again.
>>16606575
That's why I've slowly been developing a hatred for gay people.
>>16606571
>Groom yourself properly and spend time on something you want to learn.
What do you suggest?
I hate learning.
>>16606582
Learning itself is a skill you can develop.
Honestly, I think something like a simple self-help book would teach you some useful exercises that help build self-esteem and confidence.
>>16606589
Aren't self-help books a notorious scam on stupid people?
>>16606611
Yeah, but only because most are poorly written and simply plagiarize psychological techniques that actually help with unfounded, unscientific modifications.
A good therapist can teach you some invaluable techniques for overcoming self-esteem issues and anxiety, such as how to properly use visualization. A book can do the same.
>>16606622
I keep being told to get a therapist for this or that and the third, all these vague fucking half-problems.
I don't know where you're from but around here you don't go to a doctor unless it's an emergency, and as far as I'm concerned, this will not kill me nor stop me from working the days and sleeping at night.
Can you name me ONE real self-help book, then? One that isn't bullshit?
>>16606648
>I don't know where you're from
The first world.
>Can you name me ONE real self-help book, then? One that isn't bullshit?
The Charisma Myth
>>16606656
By whom? Who's the author?
>>16605963
Ya I can relate to this growing up I never had a self esteem and some other things. I was with my cousins or so called friends a often. They used me and picked on me a lot. When I got older I realized how badly they were treating me.
My mom had me because a mistake she did at a party. My mom tryed to be a mom but she didn't have a mothers love. So I often saw the world as stupid and cold. (I could write a book on shit that happened to me but in not)
As time wen by I got got more aware and less behavior problems. I have less days were I'd get upset or break but depression spouts do happen now instead of the other stuff.
I noticed have a cycle but that is to much to tell.
As hard as it is I'm actually considering going to consulting to break the cycle and get better. Lately I've been telling myself this geting emotional shit has to stop.
I thought if I get help I could learn to overcome my fears and open up to people.
There shouldn't be shame in going somewhere to get help to improve if yourself if you struggle to do it on you own.
Sorry if i talked about myself to much I thought the story might help.
>>16607272
Dam I failed that epicly and sounded like a kid. I can't delete that. Please ignore that post.
>>16607272
Please ignore that post it's mine and i can't delete it.
>>16607451
You're just a fuck-up conga line, aren't you son.
>>16608241
Well considering a can't spell and murdered English then wen trying to post about can't delete I ended up just reposting instead of refreshing the page. ya much problems much fail °-°.
