its always about bitches isn't it...
>be me
>had gf for years but still felt nothing for the past 3 yrs
>decide to change life, break up with gf
>move to germany, start bachelor there
>meet girl, has bf since 6 years lives with him since 4 years
>somehow we keep talking,shes really into me
>open myself to her like i havent done in years, tell her everything, no filter no nothing
>somehow she likes me even more
>blindly in love with her, she has feelings for me too, meet secretly a couple times, time together is great,everything is awesome. we hug kiss and all kinds of romantic shit
>things start to get serious, i tell her i love her. she says she likes me too, that she would like to escape her bf, etc says sweet things
>she even texts with me while being with bf, we stay erriday until 3 am or so speaking
>her bf starts to notice,
>she tells me that maybe it would be better if we ended everything
>panic, she says ok lets keep going
>on christmas shit blows through the roof, we send nudes she told me she masturbated thinking of me
>next day shes with bf
>i sent her all kind of sweet shit because im in love like a retarded faggot
>shes ice cold
>tell her if she regrets anything, she says no. ask her if she wants to end everything, she says no.
>???
>i am going fucking crazy with these highs and lows... i love her but its killing me
>now she doesnt want to speak for a whole day to see what shee feels. yesterday she was mad at her bf. does that even make sense?
>need to get my shit under control, need to feel nothing again. too much to handle.
what do you do or what do you think about to kill your feelings? i'm more used to feeling nothing and the good old little everyday sadness...
fuck everything
that was predictable from the start man, she wouldn't break with her bf for you
now it's time to suffer
>>16605848
we spoke about her breaking up and she didnt say it was impossible, and also her bf is making her sad since a couple of months...
i know it was predictable, but i couldnt do anything, i liked her too much, i had to try
>>16605852
>we spoke about her breaking up and she didnt say it was impossible
that's because she is stringing you along, she knew she would try to keep you both
there's probably no good way of killing your feelings, the only thing i can think of is the way she behaved
her relationship was not working, instead of breaking up or fixing it, she decided to cheat
if you two had a future together that outcome could happen again
>>16605861
>if you two had a future together that outcome could happen again
already thought about it...
but i love her i cant think rational, my moronic thought is that if i get her to like me enough she would have to break up. idk
>bw im 22, shes 26, another thing against me...
>>16605885
>btw*
She's looking to be a cake-eater, meaning, 'have her cake and eat it too." Not 100% her fault.
You need to be clear that you want her, and not her BF. You're not helping yourself, or her, by being dishonest about your feelings.
Look, unless tasting another man's leavings is what you're into, you don't want to think about the fact that you're kissing her maybe 3-4 hours after her bf ejaculated in her mouth. But that's the reality of what you're doing. Plus, in accepting this and being unhappy about it, you're being dishonest to her, and possibly to yourself, too.
Look, either she wants to be with you or not. If you pressure her in a smart fashion, tell her what you want, and that she needs to make a choice, she'll try to keep playing you both, because it gives her emotional excitement AND security, as well as massive amounts of validation (2 men want me!). But she can't respect you for what you're accepting, and that's a hard truth.
Look, either she'll finish with him or not. If you force the issue, she'll either have to be honest with you and dump the guy, or be honest with you and dump you. Either way, you regain your dignity when you tell her to shit or get off the toilet.
Because, brother, you're a cuckold now, and it's shameful to continue doing what you're doing, because it's bad for your heart, knowing that the woman you want enjoys another man too much to give him up for you. You don't want a woman who can't respect you enough to keep another man's semen out of her while she's with you.
>>16605910
thanks for that answer man.
i tried to push her... maybe not in a smart way... and she was more inclined into ending things with me.
i told her that i want to be with her and be her boyfriend already.
>also this might be important. all of this happened in less than 2 months...
>>16605917
Look, it's not much comfort I know. I was in that situation with an ex when I was in my early 20's. But you did the right thing.
Your feelings are strong partially because you're younger and haven't had enough life experience to really internalize the idea that failed relationships are just life lessons, and that if that woman doesn't want you, she's not going to love you, and, chances are, is interested in the emotional benefit she gets from you moreso than the emotional benefit you get from her... and an imbalance like that hurts, terribly, and can't be faked or lived with.
All I can really tell you is that when the right woman comes, you'll thank God that you weren't with any of the women in your past, no matter how much you are suffering today.
I'm married with 2 kids and am pretty proud of what I've got. The one ex in particular who broke my heart as a kid? She was practice, and being with her would have denied me any of the good things I have today.
You'll be OK, OP. I'm sorry you have to go through this, but it will make you a better man.
>>16605937
if i wanted comfort i wouldnt have come here haha
i've been pretty much dead inside for years as i said, but idk, she has something that penentrated all the barriers you know. she likes dark humour she laughs at nazi jokes, you can talk about absolutely anything, shes dirty as fuck in bed. she has everything i wanted in my ideal girl... she likes sports she likes going to parties etc etc... plus shes really really fucking hot, and german haha
i havent done anything but telling the truth so far. again thanks for your answer... and im glad that your life is good man. best wishes
>>16605951
You may "love" her but you aren't number 1 in her life. Seems like the only person she really loves is herself.