Hey guys.
My grandfather died back in November and my dad's incredibly depressed over it. I know he's grieving and all but he's being such an ass hole he's genuinely tearing the family apart. Pushing us all out. He's reduced my mum to tears on a regular basis and even myself. He constantly bashes my mum's side of the family and it's really, really getting me down.
I'm 18, still at school and my grades have actually been affected by this.
I'm sad. I just wanted to get it off my chest I guess, since they had another argument not 20 minutes ago.
Merry Christmas everyone. Enjoy it on my behalf.
>>16600973
That sucks. I'm sorry. I hope you and your family, especially your father, can heal. Hang in there, OP! Loss and grief are tough.
>>16600973
it sounds like your father is justifiably upset, and likely dealing with an immense level of loss, as well as personal issues. He's likely facing his own mortality, as well as what that means in context of your smaller family.
maybe cutting him a little slack, or accepting that grieving isn't an off and on switch might help.
>>16601043
I know it isn't and I dearly loved my grandad. He's forgetting he has a family at home.
>>16601051
of course he is, he's in a state of perpetual hell.
imagine for a minute that you were watching your favourite TV show but you didn't see the final episode of the season, and then without warning, you lost power and nobody around you knew how it ended.
Sure, you'd say "fuck it, it's a tv show" and move on with life right?
except, that for your father ... every spare moment is spent reliving everything wrong thing he ever said to his dad, his showers are spent fighting with demons that can never be forgiven, for fights that can't be won, and for conversations that can never end.
you're in /adv/, you know how painful breakups can be ... your father just lost half of the most important love he will ever experience in his life.
>>16600973
Sorry to hear that.
Tell him he needs to get over it. You can tear up about, but not to the point where it'll affect your life severely. He's the man of the house, he has to keep it moving.
That's all you really can do in life. Keep on running with the flame until you can hand it to the next descendant.
Life isn't about how many punches you can throw at it. It's about how many hits you can take from it and keep on running.
>>16600973
Tell your dad that your granddad wouldn't want him to behave this way. Tell him you need him right now as a role model.
Thanks for the advice guys.
At the moment he's pissed out of his head starring an argument with me.
How can this continue to happen to us?
I'm sorry for your loss, and to hear of the fallout from it. But here's the thing:
>>16601043
>>16602016
Both of these are right. Your dad IS taking this beyond normal and/or reasonable levels, but he clearly DOES need some help getting out of the hole he's found himself in. Get this man to a grief counselor.
