[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / biz / c / cgl / ck / cm / co / d / diy / e / fa / fit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mu / n / news / o / out / p / po / pol / qa / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y ] [Home]
4chanarchives logo
Why are girls so passive?
Images are sometimes not shown due to bandwidth/network limitations. Refreshing the page usually helps.

You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice

Thread replies: 16
Thread images: 1
File: eh.jpg (19 KB, 251x190) Image search: [Google]
eh.jpg
19 KB, 251x190
Every girl I meet seems to think that's my job to prove myself to her, but she doesn't seem to even consider that she has to actually put some effort in as well!

Where do girls that have their own personality and bring something to a relationship hang out?
>>
>>16531004
as counterintuitive as it seems, i've found several on tinder. by selecting for interesting settings and profiles rather than boobies (while not picking unatractive ones though!), by including risky information in my profile (like being a nihilist) and by asking personal questions.
you still have to be the man and all, but it's different from say partygurls in the club.

also actively invite her to bring something on the table, ask personal questions and get her involved. Girls sometimes also feel pushed into "that role" so they also need to feel safe to be more forward.

also remember that while you may want hot girls to come to you, it's a bit like asking for a golden toiletseat or like a girl wanting to have men waiting for her despite being fat.
>>
>>16531017

I don't mind initiating and keeping things going but I just get bored if she's not bringing something into it as well.

So far I've only met 1 girl that was actually interesting and loved to talk about things. The rest just think all they need is tits.

But thanks for your advice I'll give that a shot!
>>
>>16531026
yeah most girls are boring as fuck,hell most people are boring as fuck. that's why you only need one gf.

It's a combination of finding interesting ones and finding interesting things in one, like talking about what drives her to do stuff rather than the stuff itself. example: I couldn't care less about painting or drawing, but I do make music. those are different things, but we might be doing them for largely the same reason.
see...
>>
Why do you need them? You already know it's hard to find a woman who can offer what you need. Ok. So what will happen if you find a woman who puts effort into socializing and will be more active around you? Are you going to be happy?
Next you'll be here talking about hot this girl wants you to pay for her or that she flirts with other men, maybe she has problems, maybe she's a closet alcoholic etc. It's not worth it, it will not make you happy and benefits you gain from a relationship are minuscule.
Why are you chasing tail?
>>
>>16531052

Cause doing shit with other people is fun.
>>
>Every girl I meet seems to think that's my job to prove myself to her
sounds like you're fucked up garbage and make bad first impressions on everyone. If I had to guess I'd say it's mostly your misogyny, but lots of women don't mind that, so it's probably not your only obstacle.
>>
>>16531066

Hey I think >>16531052 sort of has a point but I want to share my perspective. I think it's okay to look for other people however I think that you should sort of just let things happen if you know what I mean. I really think it is easy to be interested in people who have the same interests as you. For example if you like biking then you will probably have an easier time talking to a man or a woman who likes biking also.

I recommend trying to meet people who have similar interests/hobbies as you and you can do this by joining clubs/taking classes etc.
>>
>>16531074
KEKKING AT THIS BAIT
>>
>>16531004
>Why are girls so passive?
There was a time when it was socially unacceptable for women to makethe first move. It was considered overly forward, even slutty.

Those days are over. Some women haven't gotten used to this yet, and continur the practice out of something akin to force of habit. But many continue the practice deliberately, for a very different reason.

The fact is that "the dating game" is still two very different games: men play hide and seek, while women play tower defense.

In that context, not making the first move can be a valuable heuristic: it filters out a great many undesirables, without even incurring the overhead of telling them no. It is, of course, only a heuristic: it can fail, and so other heuristics have to be applied to those who pass this first test. And there IS collateral damage, but the test is so efficient and effective that the collateral damage is considered worthwhile.

And that's the bottom line. When women don't approach you, you are facing the most basic of tests: do you have enough social confidence to come forward? If you want to pass, you have to ask.

By the way, I'll give you a little credit for finally starting to really vary your wording. It actually took a minute for me to recognize you this time. But don't think you haven't been spotted.
>>
>>16531074
Fucking lol
>>
Dating as an autist is hard. It takes an experienced guy to know how to deal with women. Most women are boring as shit though.
>>
>>16531074
>sounds like you're fucked up garbage and make bad first impressions on everyone.
I agree with you on the fucked-up bit. I'm more hesitant to agree on the garbadge judgment, though if OP isn't there yet, he's on his way.

But does he make bad first impressions? I have my doubts there. More likely, he is so terrified of making first impressions of any sort that he avoids making them at all. That's why he wants women to come to him: so he doesn't have to do the work.

But that phobia, and that laziness in overcoming it, is a big part of what women are trying to avoid when they wait for men to make the first move. This is a guy who isn't taking care of himself socially, and women worry that a man like that will isolate them, whether he means to or not. A test like this filters out the passive-isolaters neatly and efficiently.

This is your problem, OP. And it is your responsibility to fix it, because no one else can do it for you.
>>
>>16531147
I can't believe how accurate you are Anon. I could never put into words what was off with my ex boyfriend and everything you said is him. He was just too afraidand too lazy to make ANY effort.
>>
>>16531147
>women worry that a man like that will isolate them

You focking wot m8?
>>
>>16531195
>was just too afraidand too lazy to make ANY effort

I put plenty of effort in, I'm asking why you don't do the same you boring cunt?
Thread replies: 16
Thread images: 1

banner
banner
[Boards: 3 / a / aco / adv / an / asp / b / biz / c / cgl / ck / cm / co / d / diy / e / fa / fit / g / gd / gif / h / hc / his / hm / hr / i / ic / int / jp / k / lgbt / lit / m / mlp / mu / n / news / o / out / p / po / pol / qa / r / r9k / s / s4s / sci / soc / sp / t / tg / toy / trash / trv / tv / u / v / vg / vp / vr / w / wg / wsg / wsr / x / y] [Home]

All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
If a post contains personal/copyrighted/illegal content you can contact me at [email protected] with that post and thread number and it will be removed as soon as possible.
DMCA Content Takedown via dmca.com
All images are hosted on imgur.com, send takedown notices to them.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from them. If you need IP information for a Poster - you need to contact them. This website shows only archived content.