It's a really stupid problem but today I realized I feel guilty when I feel good or pleasure, and subconsciously fuck it up for myself.
A very basic example: I was drinking coffee, and the caffeine made me feel good, and I almost instantly started feeling guilty, and then sad and anxious.
I notice I do that with other things too, so it's not an effect of the caffeine. (IE I'd ruin good friendships or relationships for no reason at all)
I have no idea why I do this.
Anyone know what I'm talking about?
How can I change this?
>>16526090
In what ways do you ruin your relationships?
OP I think Im the same way....
Sticking around for answers to this phenomenon
>>16526128
Don't allow myself to feel good with them (emotionally and otherwise), as in I suppress them when I feel them, which leaves me mostly with bad memories and I treat them like trash without realizing.
I remember pushing this one girl away hardcore because I couldn't believe it was real and thought there was a 'catch' to my good feelings.
I didn't realize all that back then of course.
Bump pls
It sounds like a complex enough issue that you'd benefit most from talking to a therapist about it. If you're in college and strapped for cash, your university likely has trained counselors you can see for free.
This sounds like you were possibly molested as a child?
Love your pic, btw.
>>16526090
>>16526090
You said you have no idea why you do this. But which of these 2 do you relate to more?
a) You think that you don't deserve happiness, and get the feeling that you are stealing something by being happy
or
b) You worry that this is just the calm before the storm, that this happiness will be very temporary and bad things will always follow
It's very simple.
Stop meaningless navel-gazing, the world doesn't revolve around your "feelings", in fact they're completely worthless.
Problem solved.
>>16527286
Both, to be honest.
