I made a thread about my boyfriend earlier and his porn addiction.
Quick run down:
>We have sex up to 3 times a month, if lucky
>He watches porn and masturbates at least daily, if not more.
>Watches cam girls, pays for them, phone sex occasionally.
>According to him, it's a 10 year old addiction
>Been together for 2 years
>Feel more like a friend to him, constantly frustrated and sex is boring when we do have sex.
Well I finally broke it off because I am miserable with him. It ended with him turning it all around on me and making me feel very bad for "breaking up over sex wtf".
I tried to explain that it was more than just sex, that I still want to be his friend but he just got mad and told me to leave.
Why do I feel so bad? Did I do the right thing?
>>16519232
That's the right thing. Now go do something else.
>>16519232
You did the right thing, he just doesn't want to accept that it was his fault. It'll get better with time, you need to move on now.
>>16519232
Also he's probably trying to make you stay so he doesn't have to explain to his friends and family about why you broke up.
>>16519232
You did the right thing bruh. I mean way he just jerks it and does nothing with you? Fuck outta that shit lmao
>>16519244
>>16519252
Are right. Go out and start dating other people, you will realize what you've been missing.
Sexual compatibility is important. Your needs took a backseat to his addiction. You made the right choice.
Good job femanon. You at least tried.
>>16519232
you feel bad because he tried to guilt trip you
the pain is fresh but you did the right thing. trust me in a few months you'll be doing much much better
>>16519232
He has more time for his hand now. You can never be his hand.
>>16519232
Fuck him honey, his attempt to guilt trip you showed who that he wasn't ready for a relationship. If he really cared he would have made an earnest attempt to change himself for you, in my opinion. You did the right thing.
Hey, you're the girl who posted about this yesterday (pre-breakup), right? I have to admit this is kind of interesting to see -- stories on /adv/ so rarely have actual endings.
You did the right thing. It's extremely disingenuous to pretend like sex isn't worth breaking up over. Even excepting people's needs for it on a purely physical level, it's crucial to forming and maintaining bonds between partners. That's just how human brain chemistry works.
Also, if I recall correctly from yesterday, this really wasn't just about sex. He also displayed controlling behavior and consistently refused to work with you on this or take it seriously as a problem, even after multiple talks. That's a sign of disrespect. I'd never treat my partner that way.
>that I still want to be his friend
Whats with women and this shit
>>16519355
And most of the time it's a complete lie, too.
>>16519232
You did the right thing. Do not let his words get you twisted. You have the literal right to be in a relationship with who you want to be with. This guy was not making the cut for the standards you set for yourself.
He made his decision long ago, he chose his porn, camgirls, and phone sex operators. Now you get to make your decision.
I suggest not talking to this dude at all to help you move on. You literally deserve better. I don't even know you, and I know you, or anyone in this situation deserves better.
>>16519338
Yes that is me and he has acknowledged the problem, he just never took active steps to fix them. There is always an excuse why it's not important etc.
>>16519355
I usually don't want to be friends with an ex but we are good as friends.
>>16519244
>>16519252
>>16519256
>>16519259
>>16519261
>>16519266
>>16519295
>>16519312
>>16519323
>>16519337
>>16519373
I know I did the right thing and I am aware he is guilt tripping me, it just feels so horrible to live through. I didn't want to hurt anyone and I spent 2 years begging him to change for us. He kept telling me how much I mean to him but my self esteem was just taking hits each and every time I was around him.
Thanks all for the support, I can't tell my family why I broke it off and I am so grateful that I was able to come here for support through this.
I just want to say that if anyone here has started being too dependent on porn, please stop it before getting in a relationship because you drag the other person down with you.
Just make sure that you learn the right lesson from this. The lesson is not "porn is evil and will ruin everything." It's "decent men know how to have open conversations and make compromises."
If he had been addicted to macaroni and cheese, you would have still reached the same breaking point for the same reason. It's not the porn. Your next boyfriend will watch porn too. He just won't be a twat.
>>16519408
>I usually don't want to be friends with an ex but we are good as friends.
Ok, but you dumped him. I'm not going to fault you for ending the relationship, you weren't happy.
But do you really think someone who was just dumped wants anything to do with the person who did so? Either they're going to be a bit miffed to say the least, or they'll be desperate to win them back.
I always found the idea a bit insulting.
>>16519408
>I just want to say that if anyone here has started being too dependent on porn, please stop it before getting in a relationship because you drag the other person down with you.
Oh fuck you really did take the wrong lesson away from this.
Look, imagine if your next boyfriend had a problem with something. But when it starts to fuck with your relationship you talk about it, he takes your needs seriously and makes a change. Is that going to end in disaster too?
Dependency does not necessarily drag people down. Unwillingness to fix one's self for both their own sake and those of their loved ones is the problem.
>>16519430
>Is that going to end in disaster too?
No. If he is willing to quickly get the help he needs for it, of course I would stay. This has been a daily issue for 2 years straight. Not to mention the previous decade he struggled with it.
If there is an addiction of any sort, yes I urge those people to seek help because it drags the other person down.
>>16519428
It was there as an offer, whether or not he wants to remain in contact is up to him.
>>16519232
youve done well. sexual incompatibility is a perfectly legitimate reason to terminate a relationship in my opinion. he shifted blame onto you because he is immature, and cannot into taking responsibility. and he knows exactly how he fucked up.
I was in a similar situation OP. My boyfriend had only jerked off for about four years and hadn't been with a girl since then, supposedly, and I had to beg him to stop jerking it all the time. Even when he apparently did, he was too desensitized and couldn't keep it up and seemed so incredibly uninterested in me because I was not his giant titted perfect anime waifu. I was willing to do anything to get him more interested but he didn't care to try.
If someone continues to do something knowing how much it bothers or hurts you, something so unnecessary when they could be having a sex life instead, you did the right thing. It's painful, but I know that my ex would never be interested in me beyond emotional crutch because he is set in his ways and doesn't see a problem with it. People like this need to get their shit together before they can be with someone else and learn what self-control really is.
OP, what's the point of posting here now? What are you expecting?
You now look like some kind of feminist bait to be honest. Or at the very least, you are wasting people's time.
Now just go clubbing and have ONS, if that can make you feel good
>>16519706
>People like this need to get their shit together before they can be with someone else
I definitely agree and I hope I never get into a relationship with someone who has a porn addiction again. I've never felt so shitty in all my life. I have scheduled an appointment to get some professional help because of this.
>>16519717
I watch porn Anon, it has nothing to do with being anti porn or me being a "feminist", the point was I needed reassurance because no one in real life knows about this. I came here for support and advice.
>>16519728
The answers to your questions are so obvious it looks like bait.
>Why do I feel so bad?
You broke up with someone you supposedly used to love. Also since you said it was a long relationship, moving on gives you the "butterflies". That's why
>Did I do the right thing?
You said you had a boyfriend that wasn't able to satisfy you sexually. And even after you clearly exposed the problem and potential solutions to him, he ignored it.
Also, even if you did the wrong thing, there's no going back.
The only wrong thing you did was throwing out the "let's just be friend" line out of pity. But I have to admit, I did the same thing before because I couldn't handle her desperation.
Soak yourself in oil and learn to spread your junk like a pornstar
>he might jerk off more than once a day
Implying this doesnt happen in 90% of guys already. relationship or not
>Broke it off which is fine
But wants to be friends
>mfw
>>16519753
>implying this actually happens
when a guy faps too much, not even that can get him in the mood
>>16519892
>he might jerk off more than once a day
>Implying this doesnt happen in 90% of guys already. relationship or not
But OP's ex-boyfriend jerks it daily and has sex with her not even once a week.
>>16519428
>I always found the idea a bit insulting.
Why? It'd be more hurtful to imply that you're so shit I want absolutely nothing to do with you the moment the relationship perks like money or sex are no longer available imo. Offering friendship just says that we don't match romantically, but you're not a horrible person, and I wouldn't mind interacting or having a social relationship with you. A small courtesy in a bad situation.
It's up to the person being dumped to analyse their feelings and decide if they want to break it all smooth off (nothing wrong with that).
(not that anon)
>>16519892
Would you be happy if you had a gf who masturbated with a vibrator daily, sometimes twice or three times, but would only deign have sex with you maybe once a week while you wanted more? Would saying "well a lot of women masturbate" make it okay?
I'm not proud of this but I cheated on my boyfriend because of this situation. You did the right thing OP.
>>16519232
Relationships should be satisfying and fulfilling, sexually and otherwise. Unless I'm missing something you didn't sign on to be a fucking sex therapist or his addiction counselor, trying to change people you are dating is a serious mistake and a flaw, not something you should feel guilty for not doing.
The better question is, why on earth do you think you did the wrong thing OP??
fuck that guy.
If he can jack off countless times a day to porn actresses why cant he fuck you.
What a loser.
You were right
Yeah you did the right thing. It seemed like he must have been more interested in these "prostitutes" than his own girlfriend. You did a good thing.
>>16519232
Breaking up over sex is stupid. But nobody can stop you from doing it.
>>16520222
Yeah, I wouldn't care, I'm not a needy motherfucker.
Also I find that watching cam girls or doing phone sex is basically cheating. It's bad enough looking at real women while in a relationship. I get it's natural and guys do it but chosing to wank over having sex with your partner shows something wrong. I'm in a similar position. Im working on trying to look like these women. If i get to this body type and it continues I'm going to be having another talk. Well done for making a difficult decision.
>>16519741
That's a pretty typical /adv/ thread though.
>I broke up with someone and it was the right thing but why do I feel bad? How do I not feel bad?
Some people just need affirmations that how they feel, and what they did, was okay. People are social creatures. They like acceptance.
>>16520610
>watching cam girls is basically cheating
Were you born this retarded?
