So my wife is mad at me because my new higher paying job makes me wake up earlier 1 hr and goes home 1 to 1.5 hrs later.
My old job was in an agency kinda thing and schedule was very flexible - also the office was closer. I could wake up at 9, arrive at 10, and went back at 5. The catch was, I often had to continue my work for almost 3 hrs at home..which for me a bit tiresome.
Plus, this new job offers me a higher position and 2.5 times my current salary. Wife is not working and we are expecting our first child, so obviously we need some money now..
Is this called growing up..?
It's understandable why she's upset, but the fact is this job is much better for you both overall. She'll probably realize that once the money starts coming in.
Additional info : my previous job could barely make any saving in the bank.
How can I convince her? Marriedfags could probably relate better, but all suggestions are welcome.
Tell that bitch this isn't fucking Disney, that if she isn't working and there is a kid on the way, you will need to put extra hours in.
She should be happy that you have made an advancement in your job if she wasn't being selfish, but no boo hoo you won't be around as much, well that's fucking reality and yes it sucks.
Let me put it this way OP, she'd have complained if you didn't take the higher paying job when the reality of the expense of a child kicks in. You were fucked either way. Now is the time to make it very clear this is needed for her and the kid and is beneficial for everyone.
You made the right call, don't take her shit.
>>16517620
The new job is obviously the right decision, so you shouldn't compromise that. She's basically just telling you that she feels a bit lonely/neglected, with you gone all day.
Just make more of an effort to be romantic/attentive when you ARE at home. Especially considering that she's pregnant, with her hormones going crazy and the changes to her body, a lot of women need some extra attention and reassurance at a time like this.
>>16517629
This
In her head there is probably all kinds of shit about you conspiring to spend more time away from home.
Also, please learn to talk to your wife about your problems before you bring a child into the world.
>>16517676
>In her head there is probably all kinds of shit about you conspiring to spend more time away from home.
Nah, I don't even think it's that bad. She probably knows she's being a bit unreasonable, she probably knows that the new job is for the best. She's just lonely. Nobody would LIKE being left alone all day, even if it's a worthwhile sacrifice.
It just means that OP needs to make that extra effort to really make her feel important, when he's not at work.
It's not going to get EASIER when the baby comes, but her time at home will be much more occupied. Right now, it sounds like she's pretty much just sitting around alone. That's tough. OP doesn't have to make any HUGE changes, just demonstrate some understanding & caring of what she's feeling right now.
>>16517629
>>16517676
What these 2 said.
She'll know she's being silly, just make her feel special and it'll all be peachy.
>>16517626
virgin detected.
Tell her to stop bitchin.
Ask her if she would rather hace less money to pay for the baby
>Is this called growing up..?
Yes, I guess.
She's probably thinking something along the lines of: 'Now that we're having a child and I could seriously need more help at home you spend more time away'
But money is a very important factor too and 2.5 times salary for 2 more hours? It would be ridiculous not to take that job.
Your wife is retarded, but you should be talking about this with her.
Hi all, OP here.
Appreciate all the replies. I agree with all the points regarding understanding hee POV, being pregnant etc2 and appreciate the honest responses.
I managed to try to talk it out calmly with her and got a broken samsung phone as a result. Gotta repair it soon I guess (and it's her phone too, she always smashes her phone when angry, now her phone decided to give up) lol.
Anyway, just to give context, my old job was really frustrating and, despite the time flexibility, always make me work on weekends and the people there tend to call me during inhuman hours to work on PPT slides. Plus, promotion was shady as fuck and has no clear planning.
Wife also complained about the salary a lot of times, and i have told her and she understands the consequences of getting the new job, as my resignation notice is 1.5 months and enough time for us to prepare for the changes.
>>16518824
This might sound a bit sexist, but it's the truth:
Your wife has a baby growing inside her. She's basically going to just be a crazy person for a while. You have to be strong, and calm, and caring, and wait it out. It's stressful, and uncomfortable, and her hormones are causing her body and mind to go crazy.
Basically, just behave as if she's had a couple drinks and she's not quite in her right mind. Don't cave, don't take an inordinate amount of shit, but just take care of her and understand that she's not quite herself right now.
The other posters also have the right idea, she might feel lonely and a bit abandoned with your new work hours. Rather than talking the issue to death, just do something nice and romantic. Take her somewhere she likes, or do something she likes, something involving both of you that would make her happy for a few hours. Try to do something like that a few times a month. Don't talk about your future or the baby or anything stressful. Just have fun together. It's important.
>>16518851
This. I'm 7 months pregnant right now and I can tell you that I'm not myself. Usually I'm calm and stoic, now I cry at the drop of a hat and freak out over nothing.
Stay strong OP. You're doing the right thing taking this job
