Hey /adv/
So heres the thing. There's this girl in my group of friends that I know since a few months ago and that I REALLY like. We chat a bit when we meet and seemed to get along nicely. We smile at each other a lot (idk if thats actually a good sign though because shes nice to everyone in general). We high five when we have stuff in common. But since I'm so into her my anxiety kicks in sometimes and I act kind of silly around her. Yesterday we were at a party at someone's house and I suddenly couldn't hold a conversation with her, she just replied to me in monosylables. And I asked her to dance a bit jokingly and she refused kind of harshly. She suddenly seemed like she didnt care about me at all. Though she seemed to get along great with the rest. Idk if I screwed up somehow at some point or not or if it means nothing.
Anyway the following weeks she has 2 graduation parties, first one is a friend of ours', second one is her school's (we're both young adults btw). She's more excited about the second one. I've been invited to both, she asked if I was going though she was probably just being polite. They are at nightclubs. Their friends jokingly say she doesn't dance at nightclubs though idk if they were being sarcastic. I've never been to nightclubs since 5 years ago so I probably will suck at any attempt of dancing. So the thing is:
-Should I assume I still have a chance with her?
-Should I go to both or either parties and try to flirt with her there?
-How do I properly flirt with someone I've known long enough now, and with whom I share a group of friends that we meet often without making it awkard?
Besides most of our group of friends will be going to these parties.
-Or should I try something else? What should I do at the parties in general?
The thing also is that I won't be seeing her in the next few weeks unless I go to these parties.
Thanks in advance!
She isn't into you anon. You been friendzoned. Have a good time and meet girls there and hopefully you can score.
>>16515322
friendzoned!? how did that even happen?
>>16515336
The moment she started speaking to you in monosyllables and harshly refused to dance with you. She saw how awkward you are and decided keeping you as a friend is the best idea.
Girls who like guys don't act like that.
Date girls who don't raise your anxiety level.
>>16515367
This desu.
>>16515367
But the way I like her so much that causes me anxiety is kind of what drives my interest. You are probably right though, maybe I should start liking girls after I date them.
Like right now I'd probably need to make a huge effort to like another girl. Idk if I can get myself to make the effort to flirt or even go out with someone I'm not really interested in.
It wasn't actually monosylables though, I kind of exagerated, more like keeping the convo for one or two uninterested replies. But yah probably the same. Maybe the no dancing with me part was just the general her not dancing with everyone?
If I was in your situation I would do the following:
I would assume she wasn't really into me (in love), but it's definitely possible for me to get her in bed, and seal the deal. Women tend to fall in love after you've fucked them...
I would go to the party where most of my friends were going. Why? Because turning up in the club, talking to a lot of people, is you showing her that you're valuable for her socially. Women want that. They want a strong man, capable of "taking care of her", and not in a friendly manner. They want the silverback, the alpha, the playah. Call it what you want.
I would not hit on her when going to that party, but rather talk to other girls (who you know aren't going to reject you), again showing social value. You just make them laugh, have a 'lil bit of banter, and make sure she catches that. I would show her that she isn't my only one, but one of my options.
So if you did what I would've done, and you did it right - she probably would come over to YOU, flirting. Make her work for your attention, not the other way around. And if she eventually comes over, then it's time for you to have a little cocky attitude, just tease her a bit - and the rest is up to the stars.
>>16515384
That's the whole idea; practice on girls you don't care about.
>>16515421
thanks for the advice!
>>16515433
No problem bro, hope it works out with her! When it comes to dancing or not, I would recommend dancing if you're good at it. Personally I feel like a retard dancing, so I tend to avoid it. What should you do at parties/clubs? Socialize. With your friends, and make new friends.
Protip: Smile a lot, it's a sign of confidence (makes women wet).
In any case if I go to the clubs should I avoid hanging around her? unless she hangs out with me by her own will I mean
>>16515611
When you get there and see her you should go and say "hi" or whatever, then you move on and hang with other people (girls would be the best). You shouldn't try to avoid her, but don't follow her desperately.
