To further add on what I mean by what people describe as better is people often say "it gets better" as if time is somehow going to heal the burden of living. I make okay money and I support myself and have enough hobbies to keep me busy. But from my experience, age has only made things worse. Growing older and realizing there's things that are going to happen to your body without your consent, realizing you have to deal with obligation and responsibility, losing your parents, all of that shit sucks really bad and eats me away every single day. I hate the fact I have to get into a hunk of metal and propel myself at inhuman speeds at other hunks of metal for at least 2 hours every single day. I've never gotten over the anxiety of driving. I can drive pretty well, sure, but the anxiety is always there and will never go away. I hate the fact that I'm forever going to be mediocre and never achieve complete mastery at the things I want because I wasn't born into them. I picked them up later in life as hobbies and they will forever be hobbies and nothing special. I've tried to make friends but I come to really dislike most people after a couple months once I see through their fake interest in me. I just really hate reality. How do I fix this?

I'm going bald from the stress here

Who fucking knows, man. I'm going through the same shit right now. So full of hatred it makes me sick. And it's so dumb, because I'm slowly despising everyone.
Just today I went and saw a pal, and not once did she ask how I was. She just kept on singing about her woes. But it's the same with everyone, they're all too fucking wrapped up in their own little world to see other people are hurting. I feel so burdened by everyone else coming to me and telling me their problems when reality is that not once have I ever heard them ask a question about myself. Because it's always, "I, me, mine". Like the damn Beatles song.
What I'm getting at, is there is no hope. No point to anything. Who cares. Go back to opiates. Do whatever helps you cope with it.

>>16502309
>they're all too fucking wrapped up in their own little world to see other people
>not once have I ever heard them ask a question about myself.
> not once did she ask how I was
>I feel so burdened.
> it's always, "I, me, mine

sounds like you got an entitlement complex

>>16502309
I've been trying so hard to enjoy myself but life seems to be about 95% work and shit you hate, 5% enjoyment and happiness.

>>16502318
Everyone feels entitled to fairness and happiness in some way I would assume correct? I'm not that guy but I don't think attacking his position is going to make him feel any better or change his worldview in any way shape or form. I would say it's more entitled to boast on about your problems during a conversation and not give a single shit about the person you're speaking to.

>>16502318
No, it's not entitlement. It's common courtesy to at least breathe and maybe ask about how I am going. Got nothing wrong with hearing about people's issues, but please, at least try to pretend you care about how I am. Shit sucks when it's all one sided, and I probably wouldn't care if it weren't like this for everyone that apparently is my pal. It just feels lonely as hell when it feels like no one cares.

>>16502323
Career change, perhaps?

>>16502352
Look up over justification effect. Everything begins to suck when you're paid money for it.

You just want to be free from the invisible chains that have been placed on your soul. Death will not free you, only waking up will. Do some true soul searching and ask yourself if this is a dream. Loom into the mirror and ask that man looking back at you who he is. The answers are inside of you.

>>16502380
Look*

>>16502380
Listen man that dream shit is really cute but that's not the way it works in the real world. Your only purpose is to further perpetuate your survival. I may WANT to do something for money for instance, but that doesn't stop my natural limitations and the fact that nobody will ever pay me money to do these things. The world doesn't revolve around you and not everyone gets to live out a "dream". Most people are born into the footprints of dreams and simply follow suit. The vast majority of us just have to work for the rest of our lives doing things we dislike. There's 50+ year old people working at Walmart that I'm sure had lots of dreams at one point.

Anti-depressants
The only thing that somewhat worked for me
They take the edge off, it nothing else

>>16502392
Hmm I have tried both sertaline and zoloft. Are there any anti depressants that are not SSRIs? SSRIs royally fuck me up. Last time I took Zoloft I ended up cramping up involuntarily on my bed and blacking out then waking up with cold sweats and the worst headache I've ever had in my life.

I'm on escitalopram oxalate
Helps to numb everything but gives the worst headaches

>>16502401
Sometimes makes me feel really high though
Racing thoughts, fidgety, can't sit still

>>16502403
I have a shrink appointment on the 9th, I'll see what I can do but most likely it's just going to be some old dude belittling me and giving me another SSRI.

>>16502419
You dont want to be on SSRIs?
Shrinks just spew some useless BS and get you pumped up on drugs

>>16502438
Not after whatever the fuck happened to me on Zoloft.

>>16502450
That sucks
Best of Luck