Can you have a baby and then have your mother look after it while you visit it a few times a week or month (depending on whether you will be travelling for work)
The child will have plenty of love and attention and stability and I could be like a fun mum
What's so wrong about that?
I've got the baby urges but my work involves not staying in one place for very long
What about the father? Or are you trying to get artificially inseminated?
>>16470409
Why not
>>16470397
If your mother agrees to adopt/become its guardian, then sure. You'd be a shit parent though
>>16470410
Yes, sperm donor or a friend willing to be the father
>>16470414
No, I would be the legal guardian
Why would I be a shit parent?
>>16470397
>Can you have a baby and then have your mother look after it while you visit it a few times a week or month (depending on whether you will be travelling for work)
I don't know, can you? the hardest part is likely to be convincing your mother to go along with this plan of yours.
>What's so wrong about that?
Other than having a baby for all the wrong reasons?
>>16470423
Well, I mean. You basically want the fun parts of having a kid without any responsibilities. Seeing it potentially once a month? Would basically be a stranger while your mother raises it. Why don't you buy a fish instead. Won't be able to take it on the road, but I'm sure your mom will feed it.
>>16470397
Is your mom really on board to raise a baby all by herself, with you just popping by for "visits?" The whole thing just seems very selfish. You're not really thinking about your mom, you're not thinking about the kid's emotional well-being, you just want a baby because "I just want one, that's why"
Mothers going off and doing their own THANG while grandmothers take care of the kids is exactly why there are so many nigger thugs in this country.
>>16470440
She would be absolutely fine with it
What are the right reasons? Potentially producing the next Einstein? People become parents because of innate urges.
>>16470423
Why would your mother agree to look after your kid while you go off and live your life? If you want a child, take responsibility for it.
>>16470423
>Why would I be a shit parent?
Because you're talking about treating your child like a fashion accessory, to be taken off and put away when the mood strikes. You also talk about being the legal guardian, despite not wanting to perform any of the responsibilities of a legal guardian. You clearly have no clue what you are getting yourself into. This does not inspire much confidence in your skills as a parent.
>>16470452
Nah, animals do
>>16470448
I know plenty of people who were shipped off to grandparents and boarding school and such, their parents still loved them and took care of their emotional needs
The kid will always be surrounded by people who love them and gives them attention, why does it matter if it's not always their parent
>>16470456
We are animals.
>>16470454
Seeing as I will be overwhelmed with unconditional love for the kid I will visit them every chance I get and take care of all of its needs
>>16470458
Because why even have a fucking kid, then? What makes that kid "yours?" That's the same relationship you'd have with a nephew, or your friend's kid, or something. Except in this case, they don't have a single REAL parent to fall back on.
Believe it or not, the connection between parent and child is fucking important, and you're supposed to make them your top priority for at least their formative years.
Basically, this kid is going to HATE YOU for his/her entire life. You'll always be the careless, frivolous woman who brought them into the world for no reason, and turned her back immediately as soon as something else caught your attention. It's not going to be all lovey-dovey, you're not going to get any Hallmark Mom moments, you're literally just creating a lifelong enemy for yourself.
>>16470471
Where I'm from children get brought up by the entire family, I turned out OK
>>16470483
>I turned out OK
With that weird mentality about having a children you have, you clearly are not "OK".
having a child is a lifelong responsibility that alters your entire life. you, op, are obviously too immature to take such a plunge. drop the idea for, hmm, another decade. educate yourself first. you're stupid.
As an adult child of this kind of parent, look, children are not accessories. I feel like my grandmother is my mother and my mom is my sister. I wish it really was like that. Now that I'm an adult with my own life and career (it was my grandmother that fostered my ambition and encouraged me all the time to be the best me), my mom gets really annoyed with me when I hang out with my grandmother over her or share things with her.
Well if she had been around more and didn't act like I was a burden then maybe I'd care more about her feelings now.
So OP, this is what kind of future you have in store if you do this. Don't be buttmad about it later, senpai. You deserve it.
>>16470458
>The kid will always be surrounded by people who love them and gives them attention
But not their real parents, and that fucks anyone up.
Like being adopted but you get to see how much your parents don't give a fuck about you.
Even from separated parents, you eventually know one of them actually cares and the other half asses it.
I'm always surprised by the amount of people who ask questions on here, get more or less the same answers, and get mad at said answers.
"I only wanted someone to re-affirm my fuzzy feelings about myself, not actually answer my question, a bloo bloo bloo!"
>>16470397
Greatest mom of all time.
>>16470419
>or a friend wiling to be the father
Yeeeeeaaaa good luck with that one.
Besides that's very irresponsible OP. Everybody gets those urges from time to time, it will pass. Don't act on it unless you are ready and capable of commiting to it for life. Which by the sounds of it you aren't. I suggest a cat, not a baby.
You aren't ready to be a mother. You just---you aren't anywhere near ready. Calm down and buy a pet.
That's actually a really selfish thing to do to your mother. That's the only way I see it. Your mothers going to want to retire at some point but won't be able to bc she's stuck looking after your kid.
>>16470397
Of course you can do that, but it would make you a shitty parent and show you to be a shitty person. What's the point of even have a kid if you're too much of a child yourself to even take care of them? They WILL resent you for not caring about them enough to take care of them, and if you're doing this because you feel like having a kid, but you won't commit, then you're a self-absorbed piece of shit
if you want a career with a lot of mobility, then put off having a kid until either you're done moving around so much, or until you have the resources to provide a stable life and education for your kids while they're on the road with you
then again, somebody who thinks like you really shouldn't have kids
