Relationship
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
How do I get my girlfriend to not be nervous around me and be comfortable? She said she feels really nervous around me. How do I fix this?
>>16449474
Break up with her.
>>16449474
Well I guess the relevant question is why is she nervous
if she's nervous because you're a creep then it's more of a Stockholm syndrome thing than a relationship
if she's nervous because she thinks you're HOT ROD TOD then you pretty much have to find a way to humanize yourself while also not devaluing your status. Slightly embarrassing secrets work just fine, especially if you're making it into a quid pro quo sort of thing
Communicate.
Ask her why. Tell her some "personal" stuff about you. Make her feel more comfortable.
>>16449474
Give her a real reason to feel nervous. Take her for a drive and slam on the breaks a few times, ask her to get something from your trunk and push her in and close it. If she wear shoes with laces tie the laces together when she is not aware. Make her nervous.
She will eventually learn to be more comfortable.
>>16449500
HOT ROD TOD. Quid pro quo. Too many brain cells right there, my peanut brain can't process this shit, please be more clear and precise, you're too smart for me.
First you need to know why she's nervous. Be gentle when you ask this, and be prepared to hear more than you bargained for.
>>16449520
Yea, then kill her and bring her back to life, like Evanescensenescene. That will make her trust you more. I've fieldtested this.
>>16449526
Medically speaking your gf is being a salty sally while you're more in the rad dad chad category. She's imposed by you because she has a fear that she'll somehow lose you by making some dumb faux pas because she overestimates your value. That comes from pedestalizing you. You want to find a way to break that wall which can be done by showing that you have weaknesses just like her without also taking away what she likes about you.
Idk it sounds like social psych bullshit but it at least sounds reasonable to me
>>16449630
nah
>>16449474
If she's nervous around you, her atteaction for you is sky high. Let her be nervous, keep doing what you're doing to keep her nervous. Just because you're her biydriend doesn't mean you can stop putting your game on her. When yiu tell your girlfriend to stop being nervous around you, you're communicating to her to stop being atracted to you. That's what I did with my ex girlfriend when we were dating and I fucked myself.
>>16449474
Dear diary,
Teach her how to be nice to other human beings. If she treats you disrespectfully, this is because deep down she doesn't respect herself. Try not to be mean to her, support her, and help her gain self-respect and confidence. She'll be happier in general, and like even more probably. Also mention the fact the has to do this alone, like everyone. And don't be arrogant about it. Your not our lord and savior, and although you might think she doesn't know these things, deep down she knew all that stuff all along. Have some empathy for her, show her you care and you're not planning on going anywhere and comfort her, but don't overdo it. Your not her caretaker. Treat yourself with dignity as well. And don't be too arrogant about it. Nobody likes arrogant people.
