Why do you dislike them?

>>16448216
Because they like me more than I like them. I don't care about how they're doing or what they're up to, but they'll tell me anyway. I don't want to spend time with them but they'll invite me to hang out regardless and I have to go or else I'm not going to have friends anymore. I'd be just as entertained alone at home (or out drinking, depending on the weekday) and sometimes honestly get annoyed because I'd rather be on the internet than doing some pointless shit with them.

>>16448221
>>16448208
formulate goals, for which you need friends for.
like getting married, moving places etc.
you just lead a very boring life and never really needed friends because you never took any risks.

>>16449071
Romantic relationships are an unrealistic goal for me. I demand too much and have too little to offer, and very little that I can or will do to help either.

>>16448208
>>16449100
Not normal. Sounds like you're just antisocial. Time to make a bucket list that has nothing to do with love/friendship... I hope you are ambitious about your career or something.

>>16448208
Either you're not compatible with them and hang out due to boredom and peer pressure or you are a loner type.

Find some other friends and see if it makes a difference. Don't dump your current friends yet.

I am similar to you OP but when I lost some friends due to me not making effort to contact them I realised that they weren't so bad, it was me, not them. I just felt tired easily in a social setting and didn't enjoy small talk for too long. When I was out I wanted to go back home after an hour. Realised this was just introversion and people like us just tend to be better off spending a lot of time alone, or if we do hang out with people it needs to be a limited amount of time in a super chill environment. The only person I can stick hanging out with for ages on end is my boyfriend and that's because we can be in the same room without talking for hours and just relax.

>>16449105
I'm an employment atheist. I don't believe in jobs, not to speak of careers.

I'm trying to write a book, though.

>>16449115
This is my second group of friends I've managed to formulate. I dumped the first one for being a bunch of weeaboos and apparently this current group of tumblr-genderfucks are not much better.

>>16449146
Trying to write a book about what? Unless it is non-fiction that is based on literature studies, you will need more 'life' than just writing to be able to produce good work and get inspired again and again. Not to mention trying to write about human relationships if you have no real experience with feeling close to others and having personal bonds.

What about travel? Do you not believe in jobs to the extent that doing farm work or something for a while to see another country is off the table as well?

>>16449159
I feel like I've had enough life experience to write about people. So far the only thing I've truly had problem with is the whole concept of heterosexual men.

>farm work

I am 135 lbs soaking wet. If it comes to that, I am an indoor slave.

>>16449140
>The only person I can stick hanging out with for ages on end is my boyfriend and that's because we can be in the same room without talking for hours and just relax.

This is the best kind of friendship/relationship. I don't mind hanging out with friends who want to talk the whole time (which is most of them,) but I love just going over to a friend's house and just kind of living together for a few hours playing video games, doing homework, watching cartoons, or just laying down. There's something really awesome about just having the extra presence in the room or house that isn't intrusive.

I made the mistake of living with the kind of friends who want to talk all the time, so if I'm ever studying or watching a movie and I get hungry, god forbid anyone else happens to be in the living room or kitchen. Otherwise, they feel the need to fill the air with conversation and I end up stuck out there for hours because I enjoy talking to my friends. I love them to death, but I can't really accomplish anything with them in the same house.

Anyways, OP, you probably need to find people you better connect or share interests with. I find that all the friends I kept in contact with from my childhood are a lot more engaging than the ones I make in college. I feel like the problem with making friends after high school is that you're not really forced to endure something with your peers anymore, so there's not really any force driving people together. I think that's why sports are so beautiful. If you can get into a sports or martial arts club (in or out of uni) you'll probably make some really good friends, OP. I hope you're into that kind of stuff.

>>16449204
What if I'm not into anything social?

I hate group projects.

>>16449175
Still though, you can't realistically expect to write all day with little else going on and have that working out for years without hitting a wall. And that's not because social experiences are worth so much more but because they both touch more directly on what you want to write about and if you do it right, people evoke emotions in you and this inner turmoil sparks things. The fact that people draw their inspiration from real life most of the time is not because those people say so much more inspiring things than the token wise characters on tv, but because the longing, frustration, loneliness and so on you experience with other people shakes your core and changes you as a person, gives you different perspective and so on.

You don't have to do heavy manual labor in the traditional sense, you can help harvest grapes or whatever. If you're a woman you can find jobs as a nanny.

But honestly how do you envision your life? Do you have hobbies that take up a lot of time? How do you live now and feel about the future?

>>16449247
Oh, I'm not saying I have the luxury of doing nothing BUT write. I'm still trying to get an education and will be trying to scrape by a living. That will involve dealing with people.

I'm male.

And I envision life to be roughly what it has been so far. Waking up in the morning to go to school/work for 8 hours, coming back home to dick around on the internet and write, and then going to sleep. Getting drunk on the weekends. Trying not to kill myself to not disappoint mom.

>>16449288
Do you recall ever caring about friends at a younger age? Do you love your family?

Depression can numb your feelings pretty effectively, that could be the case here.

>>16449302
I think I care about my family. Or at least I'm supposed to. My mom would have deserved better children.

>>16448208
Hmm I'm similar, I had friends in my childhood, not gonna lie, some of them were assholes, but I still would enjoyed time with them. You have to find people that share your interests and hobbies. Not just hang out with people because they accept you.

>>16449321
If you care enough to not kill yourself for the sake of not disappointing your mother, that seems more than obligation...

>>16449330
My grandma went completely insane when my aunt killed herself. My mom can't afford to outlive 2/3 of her children like that, she only has two.

>>16449339
Sounds like you need to get a more stable plan to what you want to do with your life then, if you're going to linger around anyway. If you're a student try to find all resources to free therapy, even if you don't feel like it now, you're going to beat yourself up if you want it in five years and can't afford to (depending on where you live of course).

>>16449348
I live in one of those places in Europe where the area of free health care and the area of worthless mental help overlap. So I could walk into a hospital at any time to get a stupid woman's opinion for free.

>>16449373
Why the attitude, not like you manage that well on your own. There are plenty of shit therapists like there are plenty of shit people in any profession that is as wide spread, but that doesn't mean they're all useless. It doesn't seem that hard to get minor improvement from your current situation.

>>16449228
I guess if you're into any multiplayer video games you can make some friends on there. I used to have a whole network of friends I'd roleplay with on WoW and I still have a really good friend from those days that I talk to every once in awhile. I also had a really large Xbox Live friends list back when I played Halo, CoD, and L4D a lot. The nice thing about voice chat in online games is that, so long you're not too sensitive, you can let go and be yourself and say and do stupid shit you normally wouldn't and others will usually do the same. Experiencing the raw personalities, emotionality, and trolling online is one of the best parts of the internet, which is why I like certain boards on 4chan a lot.

If you're not into online multiplayer games or are looking for more tangible friends, then I suppose another good bet would be to get a job doing something you like so you can meet other like minded people, but I haven't worked at a job that interests me yet, so I couldn't guarantee its success.

>>16449381
I tried to get help for my problems thorough my entire teens. The fact that I am 21 and still dealing with the same depression as I did at 14 is all I need to know about mental health professionals.

If having sound vitals is enough for them, it's enough for me. If I am not actively shitting blood at this moment, I don't need medical attention.

>>16449384
I actually did the opposite approach concerning jobs - I have absolutely zero interest in working altogether, so I just picked a vocation in which absolutely nobody gives a shit, either.

>>16449399
>absolutely zero interest in working
>picked a vocation in which absolutely nobody gives a shit

A blind warrior choosing to battle in a pitch-black cave.