How do you start messaging a girl?
Is it as simple as just saying "what's up?"
I don't have her number, just Facebook, and I really don't know how to get started so to speak.
And yes I am actually this retarded. Anxiety is a bitch sometimes.
I ignore 'hey', 'what's up?' etc. If you want to talk to me, have a reason to talk to me, don't expect me to carry the conversation.
What should the reason be here? We don't have classes together, we're just in an organization together (admittedly she has become less active in it) and I like her.
>>16443182
if you don't even say anything back then, you are just being a bitch
to op:
i think that most people will be polite and answer you back, but they won't carry the conversation if you don't have a reason to talk to them
>>16443232
I don't have a problem talking to girls it's just finding that reason to start talking is hard for me.
So what should I do for this girl?
>>16443232
If I'm a bitch because I have better things to do than entertain someone who can't even think of a proper conversation starter, so be it. If you want me to talk to you, give me something to work with. I'm not 14 anymore, I'm not going to bother with conversations that go "hey" "hey" "what u up 2?" "nm, u?" "nm"
>>16443243
i agree that it's repetitive and boring when people start with the default conversation, that happens alot on omegle for example
what I call being a bitch is not get bored and have better things to do, but to just leave the person talking alone
i think it's better to just say hi back, let the conversation die and move on, atleast the person won't be left off waiting for a response
>>16443268
The conversation is already dead at the point where all you have to say is "Hi"
>>16443272
So what I am getting from this is: do nothing until I have some reason to actually talk to her.
Should I even ask for her number because prospects are already looking bleak.
>>16443272
for you it is, probably not for the person who's trying to talk with you
>>16443197
what organization are you in?
>>16443286
If they had something to say to me, there was no reason to start with just "Hi". The conversation was over on both ends, the other person just didn't realise it
>>16443285
You can always come up with a reason to talk to her. Something like "hey, this reminded me of you" or "I found this thing you would like based on what you said the last time we spoke about <topic>"
>>16443289
College Democrats (/pol/ pls no bully).
She has been a part of creating this new sorority at our school so she has been more involved with that and less involved with Democrats. I still see her around pretty frequently because it is a small school.
>>16443296
hmmm, is there some event she's likely to attend where you can talk to her in person? i'm not sure of a good way to just start messaging her on facebook. are you new to the organization? does she know a decent amount of people there?
at the very least could you pretend to be new to the organization, and ask her to introduce you to some people she knows in the group?
>>16443291
true, most of the times when people have something to say they will let you know it straight away
some people just say "hi, how are you doing?" first in order to be polite, doesn't necessarily mean they have nothing to say though
>>16443303
I've been in it about a year at this point. It's a smaller organization so we both basically know everyone in it by now. We have talked in the past it's just when I started to really like her, she started dating another guy (not in the org with us, so no problem there) so I backed off.
They broke up about two months back as far as I can tell.
>>16443338
maybe just say hi and ask how she's been, maybe say how you haven't talked in a while, stuff like that
>>16443243
You aren't a special snowflake who deserves some award-winning icebreaker from every person who messages you. You need to understand that "hey" and "what's up" are entirely acceptable opening messages that can lead into a more in depth conversation. Like holy shit, I wouldn't fucking ignore someone just for messaging me "hey" on fucking facebook. Get off your high horse, princess.
>>16443345
Goodness, you ARE mad.
>>16443345
>"hey" and "what's up" are entirely acceptable opening messages
If you're 16 maybe.
>>16443345
>being this upset because you aren't creative enough to start an interesting conversation
>>16443373
>>16443364
>>16443354
he got a point though, it's pretty common for people to start a conversation with "hey", there's nothing wrong with that as long as you don't stop there
saying that it has something to do with age makes no sense to me, people of all ages do that
starting a conversation with "hey" doesn't automatically mean the conversation will consist of nothing but a nauseating cycle of "wyd" and "nm"
>>16443387
No, not if you have something to actually say. But if you have something to actually say, why wouldn't you start off with that, even if it is right after "hey"?
>>16443399
starting off with "hey" makes the conversation seem more casual, informal, and more about just wanting to talk with the person vs trying to achieve a specific goal. yes, talking with the person can be seen as a goal, but it's less specific and doesn't (or in my mind shouldn't) require something added onto "hey" in order for them to be noticed
>>16443435
You can always send it in two messages: "Hey" "<whatever else you wanted to say>". If it's through text, saying it all in one message is fine, e.g. "hey, <reason to talk>"
There really is no need to send nothing but "hey", "hi" and the rest of it.
>>16443343
You're like the only person in this thread who has given advice without throwing shit at other people. Thanks for that.
The entire point of texting girls is to hang out with them in real life. After you start talking to her, ask if she want to hang sometime. Don't text just to text, she'll get bored of you
>>16443451
i just have a shit ton of social anxiety so i feel for people who stress out over the same stuff as me
>>16443450
i get what you're saying, but i just don't really understand why a person who only begins with "hey" should just automatically be ignored because they failed to follow that expectation
>>16443459
I know that's the goal it's just I don't know how to start the text.
>>16443469
"Hey, would you like to do <activity> with me on <day>?"
It's not that hard, you're overthinking this.
>>16443475
>You're overthinking this.
Ain't that the story of my life.
>>16443354
>>16443364
>>16443373
people start conversations with "hey" and "what's up" literally millions of times a day. No one gives a fuck. It's practically the standard greeting now.
Get over yourself.
>>16443697
OP here. I have actually used it as an opener before that I steer into actual conversations and it works pretty well.
So basically this whole thread was pointless!
I mainly made this thread for motivation to just send the message in the first place.
Now I don't know what to feel.
2 things
1. Pretend to be alpha, Fake your identity to be as if you were alpha. Even if it's clear for everybody that you're playing a game, gurls gonna play the game with you.
2. To talk to a girl on facebook or text
Easy mode : 10 min max
Medium mode : 5 min max
Hard mode : 3 min max
Prepare your shit and send everything fastly. And by the way, 10 min is still way too much. Play the : ``nice shoes wanna fuck`` but instead go with : ``random shit, go hang out``.
No hesitation, no time to lose.
