Would you or wouldn't you and why? Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
>>16320596
Straight female here, but my answer would be the same regardless of sex or orientation: No.
Would I forgive them as a person and not hold hate against them? Yes.
Would I give them another chance? Absolutely not.
I definitely believe in "once a cheater, always a cheater".
>got drunk and kissed someone else?
maybe
>sucked my best friends dick in the middle of my birthday party
probably not
probably not, because that cheating will haunt the rest of the relationship
everytime something I don't like happens I will remember the cheating and create an "enemy image" of the person
>>16320596
No, not always. They'll eventually get old and hideous looking just like the rest of humanity does gradually as they get older. Then nobody will want to fuck them.
>>16320596
Nope, because that's the way it is.
>>16320611
>probably not
So you're still saying there's a chance, cuck.
>>16320596
>Would you or wouldn't you and why?
no, because i don't want to be wit ha girl has cheated
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
irrelevant, since i wouldn't want to be with her even if i somehow knew with 100% certainty that she would never cheat again
PEACE
>>16320596
no and I would warn everyone that she is a cheating slut so they don't waste there time with her.
>>16320596
I doubt it. As someone who's been tempted many times, it's easier to fight it than to give in if you really love the person you're already with.
If she ever cheated on me then it wasn't meant to be imo.
today my mom told me she cheated on every boyfriend she ever had, and that is really isn't a big deal because you aren't hurting anybody
and also she doesn't believe anyone when they say they have never cheated
>>16320596
The way I see it, if she(or he) done it once, they can do it again, so I can forgive, but I'll never trust again
Past behavior is an indicator of future behavior.
You were always the cuck and your older brother was always the chad. The two of you didn't magically trade places when you were 12 and you're not going to trade places when you're 40.
>>16320657
My condolences
No, I wouldn't. If they don't like me enough to break up or be monogamous, I'm out. I'd give them that much.
No.
I would always doubt her there after.
Not only that but start question retroactively if she was doing in even before I realized it.
Also I don't want to rise someone else children or get STDs.
>>16320657
Your mom must be extremely depressing to talk to.
>>16320657
You mother is a fuckin whore. She is just trying to justify her actions by putting everyone else in the same level.
Yes. Once a cheater always a cheater. I know because I am one and I've trird to change. ...can't happen.
>>16320596
No. You could never trust them again. Broken trust is almost impossible to repair.
>>16320596
>Would you ever forgive your girlfriend for cheating?
Yes, and then I'd immediately break up with them. I'm not going to hold a grudge against them, or let their behaviors affect how I feel and my well being, but obviously they lack the character and maturity that I'm looking for in a partner.
>>16320596
I did 10 times,now I want to die everyday, keep in mind this was 6 years ago and I still haven't had contact with another woman since.
TL;DR don't do it you assclown
Absofuckinglutely.
It really says something about a person's character when they cheat on someone that they are supposed to be in a committed relationship with.
>>16320596
Of course not!
Once a cheater is very true
Kissing playfully sure, hell I'm European it's the norm here. But beyond that, you're a fucking cuck.
>>16320707
I never really had a parent child relationship with her, at least since I was a teenager it had always been more of a roommate situation
I would forgive in the sense that I wouldn't be upset with her, but I would not forgive in the sense of being with her.
Female here.
I recently got back with my ex bf after he cheated on me (he had a second, secret relationship going on for 9 months). I forgave him... I think? It's hard. I don't trust him anymore. I constantly go through his phone to check his texts, calls, fb, etc. When we get into arguments, I find myself bringing up the whole cheating thing. I do love him. We were together 3 years before breaking up..been back together since March.
And the whole "once a cheater, always a cheater" thing? I hope it's not true, for my sake, but I guess I will find out.
All in all, if somebody contemplates getting back with a cheater, just know that it's hard and trust is broken..
>>16321125
>he had a second, secret relationship going on for 9 months
That really sucks, because it wasn't just a one time fling. He developed an emotional attachment to this other person. How did you even find out?
>I forgave him... I think?
Forgiveness is when trust has been re-earned--you're not constantly checking up on him, wondering what he's up to.
>I constantly go through his phone to check his texts, calls, fb, etc. When we get into arguments, I find myself bringing up the whole cheating thing. I do love him. We were together 3 years before breaking up..been back together since March.
I understand that you love him, but all trust is lost. He showed that he has absolutely no respect for you as a person. Eventually he's going to get fed up over the fact that you're unable to forgive him and move on to someone with a clean slate. Even if he was the one in the wrong, people don't like being reminded of such things.
>>16320596
Nope. I have no problem with her finding another dude attractive, since you can't stop that, but respect is the key portion of a relationship.
>>16320596
>Would you ever forgive your girlfriend for cheating?
I honestly dont know. Its very very hard for me to speculate how my feelings would be towards her if I knew she had been cheating. I would forgive her, but probably also use it as an excuse to leave the relationship.
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
I dont, and I dont know why people seem to think this. Sure, once you have tasted an apple, you may want to have another one. But if the first apple you ever tasted was rotten and filled with maggots, would you test another one?
Moral of the story is: Cheating, like any other choice you can make as a person is just that, a choice you do. If you chose to cheat, then you will do it. It doesnt make you a cheater in your next relationship. You probably will or wont cheat again. And it depends entirely on you and you alone.
I would never chose to cheat on my girlfriend. But I would understand that if she ever did it, that I would not think of her as a cheater forever. I do believe people can change for the better.
>>16320657
It honestly is not a big deal
>assuming monogamous relationships
>>16321812
>assuming by far the most common kind of relationship
>assuming the relationship our instincts drive us to
>assuming the only kind of relationship where someone has at least a chance of avoiding cuckdom
Yeah, why would that be assumed? Fuck off, Tumblr.
>>16321820
If our instincts drive us to monogamy, then why do people cheat?
>>16321820
This
>>16321826
Because there is always a shitty apple in the bunch. You're saying it like cheating is a regular thing that everyone does.
>>16320596
Maybe I'd forgive them, but I would never get back together with them.
It's like, for however long they cheated on me, they had to either be thinking about me or not thinking about me. Both options seem pretty shitty.
>>16321841
Cheating is common enough to be a constant topic of debate and the rrason why a plurality, if not the majority, of relationships fail. Monogamy is much more of a cultural construct than anything else, which is why emotions trump them.
>>16320596
While I detest Islam and think it goes to far adulterers should definitely be punished. Reliable monogamy is essential not only for a stable society but also gender equality.
>>16321853
Cheating isn't debated. It's discussed prevalently because the majority of people find it so naturally abhorrent and disgusting.
Studies show only a minority of people cheat.
>Would you or wouldn't you and why?
No, because the trust is gone, no matter how much you want it to work it'll creep at the back of your mind
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
Nope. I've cheated before. On my first boyfriend because I didn't love him, we were teenagers and I didn't care about him. On my second because I was drunk and the relationship was already rocky and I didn't really love him. If you really love someone you wouldn't cheat, or if you've matured into someone more respectful and selfless you can stop cheating, as did I.
>>16320596
Of course I will forgive her. But she will not become my vife.
I tend to advocate forgiveness when it is practical (though never more than once).
But sometimes it's not practical. Some people do cheat serially, or do so out of spite or malice. On the flip side, some people just can't cope without becoming controlling or abusive, or at all. Or they wind up becoming consumed by thoughts of revenge. These are not situations where forgiveness works.
But when it can work, and you are sure that there will be no repeat offenses, then yeah, I advocate forgiveness. It is a painful process -sometimes even more than the initial offense- but a relationship that can survive one instance can survive anything, and that kind of rock-solid stability should not be given up lightly.
>>16320805
then you clearly haven't tried enough.
it's not hard to not cheat, if you're with a person you really love you honestly don't have that need,
the reason people cheat is because they're horny or need some sort of affection, and sex gives that, if you don't feel like you're getting that from your partner (i am i'm not saying the partner can't be someone who gives this in large doses, because the partner can be a very good one but sometimes that's just not good enough) people will find some other to get that from, it's not making it right, but when you one day find a person you really like and you're happy , you just won't need that extra affection.
I've had lots of partners, some i cheated on, some i didn't, but i've been with the same for 2 years now, and i could never dream of cheating, we're getting married and having kids. It's love, and it couldn't get more perfect
and when you one day come across that one, where it's truly, you won't have the need to cheat,
the act itself of her banging her genitals with somebody else is something i could forgive. it would hurt me but i could forgive.
its the other things i cant forgive or get over, thus my recent break up.
No, I actually used to fuck random girls in my dorm then right after go to her house and have her suck my dick/fuck her with other girls cooch stank on my balls.
Childish when I look back on it but worth it. She played too many games.
The look on her face when I showed her those videos on my phone where great.
The last time we fucked I showed her the videos on my phone and I told her she had some whores dirty juices inside of her mouth and pussy were priceless.
She tried to stab me kek
I tried forgiving my ex for cheating. It worked for awhile. Then, every time some girl would hit on me or try to sleep with me and I would turn them down, I would remember that she couldn't do that and resent her.
It doesn't take a lot to pull yourself out of a compromising situation or simply say no. And it spreads doubt, destroys trust...unless you are married it isn't worth trying to fix.
>>16321125
I'm in the same boat. I had a hunch for a long time and he always flat out lied to my face when I would ask him questions about suspicious things and try to push the guilt on me for doubting him. But I was right all along. This went on for over a year. I loved him so much. I wanted to be with him forever. Once it all came to a head he says it wasn't until then it became real to him and he realized what he has been doing and losing me became a reality to him. He immediately made an appointment to get psychiatric help. We haven't been talking much but I just feel so sad and hopeless. I want things to be like they were before but who knows if they ever can be.
forgiving a cheater is like saying "I dont care how many dicks you suck, dear".
dont be a fucking idiot. cheating = insta-cut off.
I would not
>>16320745
agreed, this is such a weak excuse.
>>16320657
Your Mother sounds like she is manipulative and miserable person. She's working to set her actions among the universe. I don't care who you are or what you've done, but claiming that breaking someone's trust and owning up that its "no big deal" is psychotic.
Serious question: what about sexting? For context, it was a difficult time in our relationship, girlfriend sent an explicit text (just words, no pictures) to a guy she knew in real life. I'm sure some people would consider that as bad as cheating and some would see it as no big deal. I'm more the first type, I think. She did know that I would be hurt by it when she did it.
In fairness, she told me she'd done it immediately thereafter of her own free will, cut contact with the guy that night and never allowed him to message her again, and felt so guilty that she ended up in the hospital with a panic attack. I have it on quite good authority that she's been nothing but honest about this ... that means I snooped and she's not tech savvy enough to cover her tracks.
This is a gray area for me. Not cheating, and she corrected immediately, but I still consider it callous and disrespectful and I trust her less in general.
>>16321867
>gender equality
Is it not equal that both men and women cheat?
No, because I would never get into a relationship in which it is out of question to go and fuck other people. Sex is something amazing, why not share it with the world ? If she wants to fuck other guys, let her have her bit of fun, and go have some yourself.
>>16320596
Forgive as in: "not holding resentment/bad feelings"? Yes
Forgive as in: "accepting them back"? No
>>16322313
emotional cheating is just as bad and she is doing it to make backup boyfriends.
I don't believe that 'once a cheater, always a cheater' bit because there are many reasons you might cheat. Perhaps if the saying were 'once they've had a deceptive and long-term affair, always a potential adulterer' then I might agree.
It's difficult if somebody gets really drunk and cheats. On the one hand they've put themselves in a situation where they lost control and sex was a possibility. So fuck them. On the other, I might also end up doing the same thing given the right circumstances. So, who am I to judge?
I'm lucky because neither me or my partner actually like going to parties or getting wasted. So if we cheat it's because there was a fundamental problem with the relationship, so it probably needed to end. You don't accidentally fuck someone while sober and in control of your actions.
Would I end the relationship if my gf cheated? Depending on the circumstances probably not. I genuinely like my gf, we started living together after dating for about 3 weeks and she is the only person I've ever asked out because I never really liked anyone that much before. We get on very well, our work and lives complement each other, she pays more rent than me, I quite like our home, and life with her is generally fairly stress free and I get to do what I want with my life while having a happy and loving relationship.
So to throw that all away because she got drunk and fucked someone one time is kinda dumb. I'd end up sleeping on the couch at my Mum's house with absolutely nothing in my life. At this point I'd probably just kill myself if I couldn't stay in this relationship. Not out of some crazy emo desire to hurt everyone, but just because I couldn't be arsed being poor and deeply depressed (which I was before my gf) for anyone from a few years till my last days.
My girl cheated on me, and I was furious. I knew it was coming, I could tell for weeks before I found out. I was already fucking another chick way hotter. But, when I first truthfully found out I was crushed.
Never had I been taken advantage of in such a way. I loved this woman, she was everything. We'd been dating for almost 2 years, we were wanting to get married. It was all joyous and great, and my friends couldn't believe how lucky I was to find someone that I got along with so well.
Our relationship was goals defined. Until I found out. I broke up with her that night. It was heartbreaking. I cried, and fucked that hotty again, and fucked some other chicks shortly after.
Weeks went by, and I broke down all over again. Just as soon as I thought I was getting over her. We got back together, and I'm sure she can tell too. But, it's just not the same relationship anymore.
I don't care about her, I don't listen to her, I just want her to shut up half the time. I've cheated on her with multiple girls since we've been back together. I often ignore her, don't invite her over, make plans with the guys.
It's a broken relationship now, all because she wanted to fuck some guys on the internet and started sending naked pics.
I just pretend I don't know it's going on. She gives an excuse about where she's going, and I don't question it. It's like, if we just don't bring it up, don't let it become an argument, it won't destroy our relationship.
But it's like she's pushing me. It's gotten to the point that she'll ask me to go down on her, and her pussy is all messy with another guy's cum, and I just act like I don't taste it. Is there something wrong with me? Would it really be better to make a huge fight and have a painful divorce and ruin both our lives? Just isn't practical
>>16322510
I'd just stop going down on her, and fucking her, and focus all your attention on other women too.
>>16322517
The thing is, the sex is actually really, really good between us. And the relationship is still good, she's good company, we're like best friends. I know she loves me, and I still love her.
I just also know she's fucking other guys, and I really don't know how to approach the issue. The weird thing is, I know it's SUPPOSED to bother me and make me furious, but it just kind of doesn't.
>then you clearly haven't tried enough.
>it's not hard to not cheat, if you're with a person you really love you honestly don't have that need,
>the reason people cheat is because they're horny or need some sort of affection, and sex gives that, if you don't feel like you're getting that from your partner (i am i'm not saying the partner can't be someone who gives this in large doses, because the partner can be a very good one but sometimes that's just not good enough) people will find some other to get that from, it's not making it right, but when you one day find a person you really like and you're happy , you just won't need that extra affection.
Here lies the problem - every relationship runs into rough patches, sometimes severe ones. During these periods, you will MOST DEFINITELY feel like your partner is not fulfilling your needs. It's not like they'll only last a day or two either - i.e. your husband can become unemployed and do through a while lot of emotional and psychological about for a year. If you believe the logic that "it may be love of I don't feel like I need anything more" then you will also believe the inverse, namely that the love is gone because you are unhappy. This, naturally, can and does often last to infidelity.
The truth of the matter is that there is an extremely high chance that you WILL get those same feelings and sensations of "falling in love" again for someone else who is not your spouse, and I'm not taking about just crushing. When that time comes, it will be up to whether you really understand what it means to be committed and whether you have the willpower and character to stick to it. It will be a conscious decision to stay with your partner, and if you believe in things like fate or "following your heart" then you are already lost.
>>16321125
I always believe it true but like an idiot got cheated on twice and took both back, I went through hell and they cheated again. Now I know for certain once a cheater always a cheater
>>16322528
Just start fucking other girls and don't be too obvious about hiding it. I'm actually a little bit serious. If it really doesn't bother you then why not just restore the parity between you two that way? Make it a de facto open relationship instead of cheating.
But jeez, I'm not show how you can not make a thing out of her getting you to go down on her afterwards? That really seems like a cuckoldry/humiliation fetish on her part. That's degrading
>>16322552
>That really seems like a cuckoldry/humiliation fetish on her part
Maybe it is, a little bit? Weird thing is I kind of like it - not really the taste, but it's like a game of chicken or something. Like she's pushing to see how much I'll take without snapping, and I'm not gonna be the first one to flinch. Tough to describe.
I'm not sure if I'm just bottling up my feelings really well or something, but somehow I just don't really feel angry or betrayed, I just don't care.
getting drunk and kissing, I'd forgive once.
But anything that shows a deliberate choice to pursue another girl sexually (sexting, fingering, sex) would not be ok.
>>16320596
Maybe I'd forgive her to an extent of not being actively hostile or angry at her, but she would not likely regain my trust and would stop being my girlfriend.
Don't know if "once a cheater, always a cheater" but the fact she cheated in the first place already makes me question her morality, loyalty and willpower.
>>16322583
This is actually interesting to me. I bet there's a lot of people on here who would just heap abuse on you (/adv/ really has a thing about cuckoldry) but I'm not judging you for it, and your (lack of) reaction is kind of fascinating. In an abstract way I can even understand it though I think I'm way too uptight about any kind of betrayal or slight to ever identify with it. I wish I could know how this would play out, or what her reaction might be if you sat her down and told her, "yeah, I'm not a moron, I know, I just don't care."
>>16322733
There's no way she doesn't know I know. She knows I'm not stupid, if she's got her pussy right in my face, I can tell if she's just been fucked. There's no question about whether or not I know. We just haven't actually sat down and had a conversation about it. I feel like, one way or another, that would burst the weird little bubble we're in right now.
As for my non-reaction - it really is hard to explain. I guess, deep down, it's like - we don't have any kids, so if it ends up not working out, yeah there'd be a divorce and it'd be tough, but we're both young and we could both move on with our lives. It's not that I don't love her and I don't value the relationship, it's just like, if shit happens it happens, I'm pretty sure I'll be fine and life will go on.
And at the moment, weird as it might be, it seems like we're both enjoying ourselves and enjoying each other, so why fuck with it?
>>16320596
Fuck no. I don't cheat, nor should she. I will even drop her at the hint of she may be cheating. Fuck that shit.
I'm laughing at all the people in this thread who don't understand what "once a cheater always a cheater" means. It does not mean that if you cheat in one relationship that you are guaranteed and predisposed to cheat in all relationships thereafter. It means that you have cheated.
It's like an alcoholic, if you have an addiction to alcohol, you're an alcoholic. And even if you go sober for 30 years and have no intention of ever drinking again, you are still an alcoholic. "Once an alcoholic always an alcoholic"
If you eat an apple, you cannot turn around ten years later and proclaim that you are not an apple-eater. No, you've eaten an apple, you're an apple-eater.
If a guy sucks one dick he's gay for life.
>cheating scum will deny this
>>16322777
>It's not that I don't love her and I don't value the relationship, it's just like, if shit happens it happens, I'm pretty sure I'll be fine and life will go on.
If she's cheating on the side, breaching trust, then you actually are already in risk. She may be fooling around, but whatever crap will happen, you will be drawn into it as her "official" partner. From reputation of a cuck, through pregnancy ending at STDs.
You should have that serious talk as soon as conveniently possible and start pulling out and preparing your resources for ending the relationship if you want to be ont he safe side.
>>16322828
I disagree with the last example. It really depends on the reasons. There are people experimenting and ultimately deciding it's shit. The same way that if you got a gay guy whose closeted and fucks only girls, ashamed to get close with a guy - he's still gay, just hiding it. Fucking a girl, if he's not turned on by her doesn't make him suddenly straight or bi.
>>16322837
The last example I put in for humor, not for argument
>>16320596
I'd never forgive.
And yeah, I believe the saying. I wouldn't long term date a cheater.
No dude
>>16322852
This topic is too serious for humor
>>16322940
Cheating isn't serious if she doesn't take your assets
Women aren't worth their weight in latinum
>>16322940
Back to tumblr with you.
My partner kissed a girl while on a night out.
She'd been trying to get him for months when we first went out and he was always denying her.
She kept trying to rope him into helping her out with her car late at night, saying she'd broken down.
One night he went out on a stag do with his best friends and she knew about it. Found him towards the end of the night and took her chance.
I wasn't happy, I was hurt as it takes two to tango. No one was blameless but I forgave him for it.
We're still together and have an awesome relationship.
Not sure if that counts as cheating.
>>16323147
>counts
See this is the problem here, it's all subjective. It's all about what YOU consider to be cheating.
If him getting kissed by a girl, while drunk, and with friends (and whatever other factors matter to YOU in this equation) adds up to cheating to YOU, then its cheating.
It's not [cheating=penis in vagina]
And this subjectivity causes alot of problems.
Me for example
I caught my partner sexting another person. To me it was cheating. To her it was not.
Because to me [cheating = doing anything with another person, that should only be done between partners]
Idk what she thinks cheating is, maybe she thinks there has to be a physical element to it.
And so I am adamant that she is a cheater.
And she is adamant she is not.
And the relationship suffers.
Now I have to live with this shadow in my thoughts, that she is a person who is perfectly morally accepting of emotional infidelity.
Thanks feminism for slaying monogamy, cunts.
>>16320596
No forgiveness. Break up and cut all contact.
>>16320945
Glad you suffer.
>>16321954
Shame she missed.
>>16322837
What does cock taste like fam?
>>16320596
No. Betraying somebody's trust like that not only cuts extremely deep, but also shows what a truly terrible person they are that they would be willing to cheat.
Cheaters are self centered and impulsive shits
>>16320596
Don't love these hoes.
>>16322510
Holy cuck batman
Speaking of my boyfriend, but.
>Would you or wouldn't you and why?
Likely not. I love him a lot. We're both overly monogamous, it would break my heart if he'd cheat on me. It feels bad just to think about something like this.
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
I'd rather judge this based on the case on hand. I think it's a bit too strong opinion for someone like me.
>>16322313
I think that any form of sexual activity with someone that isn't your partner is cheating. I don't care is it sexting, going on cam, or fucking IRL. It's the same thing.
All of the above means ''my partner isn't enough for me'', nothing else.
>>16321890
You say that but next time you do it you're just gonna say "oh I didn't really love him"
You're a whore and a cheater. Deal with it.
>>16320596
No. I don't get the motivation. Maybe if I was ever tempted to cheat I could understand the mindset but I just don't get it. If they actually cared about me then I don't see how they could cheat. I guess I'm a devoted person but that's just how I see relationships.
>>16324858
Forgot about the second part of the question: People can change, but they're going to have to prove it to someone else because I can't see myself trusting someone who cheated on me again.
I forgave an ex for cheating on me once. She went back to treating me like a piece of shit and wound up cheating on me several more times after the fact.
So I don't forgive cheating any more.
>>16320596
Nope. If she cheats I take my advice from a famous doctor.
"Bitches ain't shit, but hoes and tricks"
...and I move on. If I can stay true to her, why can't she. There's no excuse. It shows a lack of respect on her part.
>tfw open relationship
It's weird; she brought it up five months into the relationship, and I'd never have asked for anything like this on my own, but I'm finding that I've been having far more "dates" than she has.
I'm not sure if this is a healthy situation to be in.
>>16322500
dude you're a retard
>it's okay for me to cheat, but if she cheats, "FUCK HER!"
you are scum
no, if she cheated, her worth to me becomes 0
>>16320596
Honestly, break up with them now. That's the only way to (possibly) ensure that they learn from their mistake and never hurt someone again through their actions. They need to understand that their actions have serious consequences beyond "Well my SO won't like me for a couple weeks"
>>16320657
she could be bpd, whom have high libdio or sociopathic since she can rationalize any immoral bevahiour
>>16320596
Absolutely not. The relationship and the trust is broken. They could be telling the truth, and they could never cheat again. But I'd never ever trust them again.
>>16320596
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
As a prolific cheater (allthough not a grill) yes, this is a thing. It's not like I set out to do it, in fact I try not to, I just can't seem to not do it. It's like an addiction.
I'm pretty sure there's been survey research that shows the majority of cheating is done by people who cheat multiple times.
Other research shows certain individuals (animal research) consistently use cheating or deception as a reproductive strategy.
So no.
The only way someone will change their self-serving behaviour is if it becomes less self-serving through bad consequences. Forgiving a partner for cheating is a good consequence for a cheater, meaning they got what they wanted with no bad repercussions and have no reason to change.
>>16320596
No.
I tried once.
And get two of the worst years of my lifebefore another "cheat"
Yes, once a cheater always a cheater.
No, probably not.
Especially not after a while in a relationship.
If she made out with some random guy on the dance floor the first weeks we were dating whatever, but cheating is never good.
>>16320596
tbh Anon, I'd have a hard time getting back together with a girl if I knew she had been with someone other than me after we broke up.
I cheated on my ex girlfriend.
Things were bad and she "stopped" caring about me emotionally - this she knows by the way. Looked for comfort somewhere els. I told her months later, after a sour period in out relationship. She broke up with me two weeks after I told her.
Yet again. There is absolutely no excuse for cheating.
Went through a rough psychological phase thereafter. Drinking problems, a suicide attempt.
Would I do it again? Pic related
>>16320596
My ex cheated on me big time, I left for work for 3 months and came home to find all my friends telling me she slept with a different dude every night including several of my friends themselves
We broke up obviously and I hated her for the next 6 months, like fucking hated her, I was also depressed as hell and never wanted to leave my room, I lost loads of weight from just not eating, roughly 20kg's and became a solid 7/10 from a 4 or 5
I eventually started meeting other people and am happy again, I now spoke to my ex and have forgiven her, apparently she is still as miserable as I was when she left me, and is feeling suicidal and everything.
I'd never date her again, I don't think I will ever even be friends with her, but I have forgiven her for what she did. Although I'd probably find joy if she got an std or something
>>16320596
Uh, maybe, but I really wouldn't be in any position to hold cheating against her.
It all depends on what kind of "ground rules" you've established with someone. Every relationship dynamic is different.
I would never be so presumptuous as to assume I could be everything someone wants all the time nor would I want to control their choices and I expect the same respect in return.
If my girlfriend had sex with another man, so be it. I'd want to know about it and why she felt the need. If it was a fleeting physical encounter and I knew she still wanted to be with me, then fine. Maybe the relationship parameters change a little, maybe they don't.
If her infidelity was borne out of a whole range of incompatibility issues, then clearly it is time to end the relationship and move on.
If she is clearly doing it out of spite, then perhaps it's time to hold a grudge.
>>16320596
Dont forgive, just strive for a better one.
Just make sure she isnt a slut and you ll be fine without cheats on her side.
>>16321798
>she cheats on you
>you believe she will change
>so you forgive
ok but she liked the dick she sucked and how that dick raped her ass. and right after leaving she was dreaming of her next time because it was exciting to be with someone else, to have an extra affair secretly (till getting caught, girls love danger and this type of excitement shit)
If she liked cheating on you, she will be cheating on your relationship and in the next ones she might have.
You eat an apple, you like it, you eat apples every day, but then you taste gummy bears coated with sugar. then you have the chance to also have bacon with chocolate in a hambuger. while the apple will always be there for all your basic needs. wouldn't you eat the chocolated-bacon-hambuger from time to time trying to not get caught from Mr. Apple?
Yes you would, everyone have ambitions and everyone strives for the better and improvements in their life. anything that makes one feel better, will go for it.
Tip: Stop lying to yourself, or you will remember this post one day. (dont forget her if you ever get to know she cheated you, bro)
>cheating is primarily fueled by: ("promiscuosity %" plus "ambition %") minus (your "absolute worth value") if result is a promising positive value then she will cheat. then she'll decide if it's worth it the action and possible outcomes. just be alpha and make her your own personal vip secret whore and treat her like a dog, and have her for ever.
I'm 28 male, married with first child born yesterday.
For the past 2 weeks I've been
>>16323235
feminism? not only that.
equality and freedom that has also done it. male and female are different thus should have different roles in life. you give both the same rights and boom there you go my friend.
we have males(betas) behaving like females
and we have females behaving like males (kings or very assertive alphas at the very least)
this didn't happen long time ago.
Women couldn't go to war, women couldn't work at all, they couldn't leave home after 8oclock and etc
Its equality and freedom more likely than feminisim (feminism can exist because of freedom, otherwise feminism wouldn't be heard by anyone at all even if the word existed)
Its very clear: give woman money and they will go sex tourism (for feeling independent thus giving them a sense of power, feeling powerful to fulfill her most addictive/fun activity and primal sense: the sex ritual, the mating act and all that comes right after just seeing the person shes going to fuck, till the last moment of the intercourse) and whore rampage for a long time till feeling how it is to feel really lonely and unloved. then probably either suicide or find a partner who doesn't care of her past or a partner who is being lied to about her own past.
TIP: be alpha, treat her like your slave dog. or it will be the opposite. you'll be the puppy and she'll be the master.
enjoy.
>>16325852
I've been in an emotional affair with this amazing girl I met.
No sex (yet) but unexpectedly falling in love with someone else while married is fucked. Not like I intend to cheat, and physically I havn't yet.
I think my marriage is flawed, but it's still able to be fixed if we communicate about our issues. No one needs to know about the girl.
I'll have to let the girl know our options. ....going to be the hardest thing, but easier than a divorce.
I feel like I'm a piece of shit. Can't help the way we feel but can help the way we act on it.
That chemistry in the brain when mutual love first sparks is dangerous - please watch out everyone. It makes your judgement very clouded. You ride guilty lows and soaring highs.
Been in a few real relationships.
3 years, 10 years and currently 2+ years.
I have never cheated. If a girl cheated on my, i doubt i would forgive.
One girlfriend was unsure about our future so she asked for a break for the summer, she fucked someone, i forgave.
This i can respect, she gave me the opportunity to do what ever the fuck i wanted as well.
But keeping your current partner wile you try to figure out what is going to happen with your new crush. Nah do not condole
>>16321820
>>16321826
both of you are wrong imo.
we are 60% monogamous the other 40% is promiscuousity from my perspective. (meaning everyone will feel like having an extra affair at one point in their lives)
same it goes for being 100% alpha or 50% alpha 50% beta (personality characterstic)
it's all in your brain and you can choose independentlly of your instincts/emotions if you are aware of yourself. you have to be painfully conscious. otherwise if you have 10% monogamous dna but 90% chances of promiscuosity then you are more likely do just want a good pounding or smash more often, even if you were educated with islam and live in a reserved type of relationship culture, you'd want to find for that promiscuosity (unless you are aware and really decide for yourself to follow your ethics and morals of your society you are in and were raised with giving your education)
actually its not a genetic against the opposite. its just how "powerful" (if 100% or just 20%) the data that says on how promiscuous you have to be in that part of your dna it is.
thats how i been thinking no proper source or anything apart from i like biology and psychology.
>do you control your emotions or do they control you?
1. if you control them, you "ITS YOUR OWN" own decision if to be loyal or not
(if your partner wasnt loyal, leave it for ever, have no feelings for you and its a greedy person with too much ambition all for him or her self)
2. if you dont control them, its "NOT" your own decision if to be loyal or not
(if your partner wasnt loyal, leave it for ever, very high chances of promiscuosity can be detected depending on behavior of you both (confidence and attitudes) and how long you both been living together. if its early in the relationship (minus 5 years, forget it, dont forgive and leave))
Cheating is not a decision, but a character trait. So to stop cheating, people have to mature, which cannot be achieved by telling the partner that this won't happen again. It is possible to change, but it's hard and few people actually have the willpower to do so, especially because the character of cheaters is usually quite weak to begin with, which is the reason why they cheat in the first place.
I wouldn't hate my partner if I was cheated on, but I would be disappointed by myself for not having been able to read her character well enough to expect it from her. And of course I would end the relationship, she is not what I am looking for in a partner.
>>16320596
>nope, never
>yes
>>16325888
we have to be more mono than pro.
simply because we have grown to have males with no spines in the dick.
the more mono the earlier we would be getting rid off the spines. the more pro the longer it would take (or even could never be getting rid off if we dont stop it, but we did it)
and before some conspiracy/paranoid says:
evolution is fake.
well genetics mute for a reason. they change and evolve every second in your brain to write data and also change in bacterial life. and we come from bacteria so yea.
we have no spines thanks to our ancestry monogamous life style, and we'll get back to have spines one day. and there is nothing wrong with that. it just has to happen.
what goes up goes down and viceversa. nothing is infinte and the universe is alive.
all these sluts have to exist, simply lower your odds and go for 18-22 y/o girls.
enjoy.
>>16325908
cheating is both a decision and a character trait.
>>16320596
>Would you or wouldn't you and why?
depends on what happened in what circumstances
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
depends on what happened and in what circumstances
but if People are Rally regretting what they did i believe they should get a second Chance. sometimes People do make mistakes and learn from them and get a better Person.
>>16325953
your future wife/husband is going to cheat on you
why be a doormat?
>>16325956
>why be a doormat?
why throw away something that means alot to you because of one mistake you probably could excuse?
as i said. it depends on the Situation.
did you never make a mistake and wished for a second Chance while really meaning to better yourself?
Nope. Cheating or trying to commit an act of violence against me are an automatic relationship ender for me.
>>16320596
>Would you ever forgive your girlfriend for cheating?
No
Would you or wouldn't you and why?
Wouldn't forgive because that person has zero respect for you and doesn't love you, it also makes them a liar and reveals what a sad person they are.
>Do you believe in the "Once a cheater always a cheater" phrase?
no shit, it's 1000% true, if you ask any person that forgave a person that cheated on them, they will ALL tell you it was a huge mistake.
If someone cheats on you, never look back, no matter how hard it is, just don't look back, you'll grow from the experience, you'll learn to respect yourself and love yourself more. If you leave someone who cheats on you and never talk to them again, it actually feels good.
Getting "revenge" or staying with someone who cheated even as a fuckbuddy is literally the stupidest thing you could do, guy or girl. Don't do it.
You only have one life, not even 100 years to live, you had your chance with this person, and the person didn't care. You leave and never look back, you improve yourself because you can and you won't give up.
