I need advice. I already asked my friends to chat with me about it and I'm going to see a psychologist, but I migh ask here as well. I need to deal with this problem, one way or another, as fast as possible, because it's killing me.
A lot of time in my life I spent inside my own head. It is sort of like sleepwalking, but instead of dreaming, I imagine talking with people. Like I am repeating in my head what I want to say to someone and I imagine their response. I do this all the time, especially during stressful situations.
I feel like I'm getting in the zone just by thinking too much.
When I'm not doing that, I am extremely conscious about everything I do. When I talk to other people I do it with a purpose in mind. It rarely comes naturally, like other people do. I don't ever small talk unless I consciously chose to.
I know I am not a psychopath, because I am not fearless and I can feel emotions. Suprisingly I have a lot of empathy and I know I NEED other people. But this needines combined with my isolation makes people less likely to approach me, isolating me even more - a circle.
How do I get out of my head and fucking live in the world around me?
How do I stop being conscious when I stop daydreaming? How do I live the moment?
How do I connect with other people? How do I get out of the circle of isolation?
Therapy. Also you are not a special snowflake that has some mental issues that make you special, or whatever. You have just fooled yourself into this way of being, whether as an excuse to not deal with others or to mask your rejection because you probably are a legit nice guy.
Therapy.
Narcissism.
You obsess over how to behave in a situation and that nothing feels real because you're living under an assumed identity.
>>15299211
>an excuse to not deal with others
May be this was the case back then, but now I need and desperately want to deal with others.
>>15299211
Who said anything about "being a special snowflake"?
>>15299249
As if anyone would describes themselves of that, but it's apparent that he thinks of himself this way, even if he has tricked himself into not seeing it.
>>15299240
Yeah but that's what I'm saying, feeling this way in the past put you in this position and now you want friends you don't realize its yourself holding you back.
The other guy mentioned narcissm and that seems pretty spot on too, though you are likely in denial about that as its easier to brush off as its not really the aggressive kind that you normally see om people. Yours is quite passive making you reserved.
>How do I get out of my head and fucking live in the world around me?
>How do I stop being conscious when I stop daydreaming? How do I live the moment?
No clue. Maybe try looking at your physical surroundings and analyzing whatever shit you see there instead of whatever you'd be daydreaming about instead. Keep your focus on stuff that's actually there in front of you. Keep your thoughts moving so you don't get lost in them though. So keep your eyes moving I guess? I don't know, I'm really just spitballing here, probably this >>15299211 would be best.
>>15299195
these are struggles everyone faces...or most do - others are automatons who never question anything in their life...
you're self-conscious...sure its a bit narcissistic but so what everybody's got their thing, and I've been there...just take care of yourself and try to relax, these things resolves themselves if you don't worry about them
>>15299264
That makes sense.
>>15299264
Yes, you could say I see myself as a special snowflake. I realize it is wrong or even silly, but at the same time I am unable to think any other way. This is the drive that fuels my ambition and without it, I don't think I would be able to achieve what I want.
How do most great people achieve success? By this irrational belief in themselves.
>>15299277
It is the first time I consider narcissm. I thought I have to be a manipulative asshole, but appearently that's may not be the case.
>>15299294
I thought the same way, that being so conscious and in control is a good thing. And I still think this way. But the loneliness is killing me.
>>15299320
anon the hard truth is that we're all completely alone...always...but that's not such a bad thing
you say you have friends - that's better than many! enjoy it!
>>15299195
this is all pretty normal, at least for me. you simply spend a lot of time in your end and thus overthink everything. i can give you the advice that helped me get over it, but i dont know how it would apply for you
>How do I get out of my head and fucking live in the world around me?
smoke weed. thats what did it for me. smoking weed removed my inhibitions and let me feel comfortable with myself. i met my best friends in the world, people i vibe really well with, strictly because one day at work me and just some random coworker talked about smoking together. smoking with your buddies is a strictly social experience, one where you dont have to worry about being judged because stoners dont give a fuck about that sort of thing
>How do I stop being conscious when I stop daydreaming? How do I live the moment?
stop thinking. take it from me, the situations youre creating in your head are only destroying you from the inside. a good example that happens to me a lot is whenever im into a girl and trying to get into a relationship with her i start imagining all the ways i fail, things like her falling for my friends instead of me.
one thing that helped me get over this is the realization that every time i imagine a scenario, no matter how well i plan it or how likely it actually is, when i get to the point where that scenario happens it never works out that way. ive learned to accept that the universe works in strange ways and that theres no point in worrying about what may or may not happen (in other words, the best laid plans of mice and men)
>How do I connect with other people? How do I get out of the circle of isolation?
stop investing yourself in what people think of you. stop judging people, even if its just silently. stop condeming people. realize that everyone is only human and were all just trying to make our way through the world. be happy. dont try to be happy, dont try to find reasons to be happy, just do it already.
>>15299425
(not OP but) How do I find cool stoner friends to hang out with? Even if I don't smoke weed very much?
>>15299425
NotOp, thanks a lot for this. I have the same conduct as OP describes and not thinking is pretty hard. Weed calms my mind a lot but also feels good to be awake when you're finally acting calm and real.
