This guy obviously likes me. Everyone around us can see it and keeps making comments about it. He was really handsy and flirty until I actually confessed to him. He stopped being as forward but it's still there on the surface.
A few weeks ago I made it clear to him that I like him once again and he told me he's not sure he can return my feeling fully and is afraid of giving false expectations. At the same time he keeps sneaking touches at me whenever possible or he's tipsy or something. We really click on an emotional level and if he didn't feel any of it/was uncomfortable he'd stop initiating hugs and stuff with me, right?
I mean he obviously has some kind of an intimacy phobia right? I've considered that it might just be my overconfidence but people around us actually think he's the one who has feelings for me while I keep a poker face.
Is it pretty much a lost case and I should move on or is there a chance that he might open up some day? I thought that he's just unsure cause I usually don't make my feelings clear to guys but I've done everything I can here. Anyone gone through something similar?
Weird.
I mean yes, he obviously like you one way or another since he keeps initiating contact, but he might just be a natural flirt. How does he act around other women, especially attractive ones? Is he as flirty as he is with you?
If so, then sorry, he likes you, but just as he likes you he also likes another 50 girls. If not, then I have no idea whats going on. I could say its an intimacy issue, as you mentioned, but people with this issue tend to not initiate physical contact. Maybe he has some weird reason he doesn't want to get into a relationship.
>>17369471
Well I don't know what he's like with people without me but when I am there he's focused on me. Like it's weird, even if he's being kind of flirty with an attractive server or something he keep looking and me to see fi heard his punchlines so to speak. And when I tell the people who think he likes me "he's flirty with everyone" they tell me he's not.
I guess it could be that he's older and I'm "nice girl" so he might be afraid of fucking me up. In any case there's probably nothing to do at this point right?
>>17369448
are you fat, ugly, or got a bad reputation? im not trying to sound mean but some people simply dont want to get the reputation of dating a certain person
>>17369502
Sure there is.
Ask him to date you. Tell him you'd rather understand that he may not feel about you exactly how you feel about him, but that's fine and these things may change. Also you'd rather try it out and fail miserably than not try at all.
...some variation of these ideas.
It's quite aggressive, I know, but the alternative is to just let things be as they are.
>>17369511
No I'm fit and most people seem to find me very attractive. Not to sound vain but I did think that maybe he's intimidated so that's why I made it clear that I like him first.
And I'm well aware that even if someone is attractive on paper, not everyone is going to be attracted to them. I even thought that maybe people are saying that he's into me just because they find me generally attractive and assume he should be. If he wasn't attracted to me he'd probably stop the touching routine thought.
>>17369532
After the "I'm not sure I can fully return your feelings" bit I'm kind of apprehensive about putting myself out there again. I gave him a lot of chances and he hasn't taken them. I'm pretty sure I should move on but I just wonder if people like that even turn around.
>>17369542
You must understand that there are many reasons why he would say that. Maybe you just surprised him and he had a brain fart or something. Ridiculously enough, these things happen. I know it happened to me at least.
Obviously, it's your choice if you want to keep trying, all I'm saying is that it's not necessarily a lost cause. Most successful relationships are built in time, not on a crush.
>>17369587
I don't know, I guess I'm just an open person and I would try to explain what the problem is to the other person. He knows how I feel and instead of explaining things or putting distance between us he gives me a huge huge after not contacting me for weeks after I bared myself to him. I want to stop making a fool out of myself.
I'm pretty sure it couldn't work if we can't understand each other. I just wonder how I could avoid things like that in the future.
>>17369448
Hmmmm, what does he look like? describe him. He sounds like someone I know
>>17369641
I doubt it's the same person. What's your guy's excuse?
>>17369653
It's not the same situation he just sounds like someone I know. UK?
>>17369658
Nope.
focus on someone or something else. if he comes around eventually then he does.
>>17369658
No girl is interested in you, delusional creep
>>17369744
u wot
>>17369660
Malta?
>>17369764
Nope but I wish someone would explain why your "friends" act like this.
