The doubt in my head

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Anonymous
The doubt in my head 2016-07-14 00:00:00 Post No. 17354483
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The doubt in my head Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:00:00 Post No. 17354483 [Report]

Hey guys, lately I feel like I can't shut off the voice in my head and enjoy things, specifically my girlfriend. Her and I aren't close enough to visit each day, so the majority of our interactions are through phone. We recently started dating, and since we started its been hard for me to stop worrying about what impression I'm leaving on her. She tells me very often and with such genuinity how much she enjoys all of me and loves me; I'm convinced she has no walls built around herself towards me. I've said the same thing to her and I meant it too. But what feels like 45 minutes later I'm back to overthinking everything and forgetting to enjoy her and life. We've succeeded in having sex after me failing to get it up a few times due to the same nervousness. She's not aware of my issue as of yet because I feel like its a hurdle in my head that shouldn't be there. Before we were dating I still loved her and she still loved me and our interactions were more fluid. But now when I think about her sometimes its fluid sometimes I'm overthinking and nervous and I hate it I just want to love her all the time and I keep stopping myself because of my insecurities that I feel so aware of but they still effect me. I feel like if I can't find a way to enjoy this girl without barriers now that she's close to me, I'm missing out on real love.

I wouldn't say I'm an unconfident person, most people find me to extremely likeable. But for some reason I can't trust that she'd be ok with all of me and I stop myself from breaking down my walls.

Can anyone give me some advice to this situation? In this moment I'm upset, but 5 hours ago I looked at a picture of her and wanted to pick her up and kiss her.

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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:04:17 Post No.17354501
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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:04:17 Post No.17354501 [Report]

>>17354483
What exactly are you overthinking ? Your own issues or things with her?

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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:28:06 Post No.17354602
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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:28:06 Post No.17354602 [Report]

>>17354501
I guess it's both. I start to overthink things with her, and I catch myself doing it so I tell myself to stop doing it. When that happens it feels like my brain just stops.

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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:44:30 Post No.17354668
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Anonymous 2016-07-14 00:44:30 Post No.17354668 [Report]

Well...

I believe a man shouldn't have a woman in the center of his life. I don't mean we shouldn't love her, yes, we should and it's fucking awesome for both sides in many ways, but when we are talking about priorities, woman shouldn't be number one.

And I believe they don't want you to put them on number one. If you do so, you'll stop following your life and dream, stop growing, sacrificing it to be with her.

Bottom line, puting her first makes you and her sad and less atracted to each other or life. Therefore, you should stop forcing yourself to "love her all the time" and give yourself some love. That's one way you can love her more and fully.

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Anonymous 2016-07-14 01:17:31 Post No.17354780
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Anonymous 2016-07-14 01:17:31 Post No.17354780 [Report]

>>17354668
I've made that conclusion before, I know that me not putting her first is not the issue. I think that I just know that I like her, but I don't know really how to do it. And I know that there's no specific way to do it, I just keep believing it. I want to call her and talk to her, but I don't even know whats going on.