Are you actually being proactive when it comes to dating? Because as a male, rightly or wrongly (this isn't a debate about that, let's not derail the thread), you're expected to make the first move. If you're just sitting there, waiting for a girl to come to you, chances are nothing's going to happen. It's not about lowering your standards, it's about actually doing something.

>>17298061
>7/10 int
Most likely overrating based on college "achievements" and a factor why you attract fewer people than expected.

Also I'd say it's less of "just wait and you'll find one person" and more of a "just live your life and you might find someone who's compatible" but perhaps it's being overly nitpicky about language.

Other than that, what social stuff do you do? Was the chick you wasn't into at least generally attractive or some desperate fatty? What are your standards?

>>17298068
yeah, I think that's /thread because I don't really actively pursue it, which is a problem itself—that anxiety about asking gril out > desire to ask out girl. So I've told myself that I must not really want to date X or Y girl if I'm not confident enuf to approach

>>17298078
Not desperate fatty. It wasn't her looks that turned me off. I just really didn't like personality. Also, are you saying that I may have an inflated ego (referencing 7/10 int overestimation), which may in turn bother women? That's possible altho don't think that's a major/main problem

>>17298078

>Also I'd say it's less of "just wait and you'll find one person" and more of a "just live your life and you might find someone who's compatible" but perhaps it's being overly nitpicky about language.

Yeah, I'd say I agree that this is what I meant, but I haven't really met anyone that I felt super strongly about—"like wow, I want to date you!" Altho, I guess that's sort of the point of dates, to see if you are compatible

>>17298083
Well there you go, now you know where you're going wrong. Surely you see girls who you think are attractive on a day to day basis, right? Why not make a point to talk to them? Not necessarily with the goal of getting a date, even just to make friends.

>>17298089
It's a lot about the presentation; some people with an inflated ego can seem more charismatic, others more pathetic. Obviously don't have enough info to tell which applies more to you but it's a factor I'd consider too.

>but I haven't really met anyone that I felt super strongly about
Sounds perfectly normal, and not something "to fix". Unless you have unrealistic high standards or are super eager for a relationship, I don't see why you would even change your approach.

>So I've told myself that I must not really want to date X or Y girl if I'm not confident enuf to approach
Perfectly reasonable thinking too. If you were that desperate for a date, you'd try harder, and as already noted your chances to date any girl is lower if you're not being proactive, which you know either way.

>>17298100
Seconded.