I'm a guy. I'm skin hungry. And literally no one to cuddle or hug. I live with my mother and sisters, until my father comes back. Out of which, only the latter accepts some hugs. No one in my family, except myself, likes prolonged cuddles or hugs.
And I've got no friends, either. The only female I know here probably thought I was some sort of creep after I have a big hug last time we saw each other. I'm so starved from affection I probably came off as needy.
I don't know what to do. I would probably go to some asylum and hug old people, but it feels a bit awkward, especially because I'm essentially hugging strangers. Help?
>>17277225
Stop being a faggot who needs cuddles. You're an adult.
If you're not, this is an 18+ site, leave.
>>17277248
I know this is bait but
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/affectionado/201308/what-lack-affection-can-do-you
>Specifically, compared to people with less skin hunger, people who feel more affection-deprived: are less happy; more lonely; more likely to experience depression and stress; and, in general, in worse health. They have less social support and lower relationship satisfaction. They experience more mood and anxiety disorders, and more secondary immune disorders (those that are acquired rather than inherited genetically). They are more likely to have alexithymia, a condition that impairs their ability to express and interpret emotion. Finally, they are more likely to have a preoccupied or fearful avoidant attachment style; they're less likely to form secure attachments with others in their lives.
>>17277262
It's not bait. It's really not. You need to toughen up and take care of yourself. There's a bunch of shit in life that you're going to want and aren't going to have. And "cuddles" are one of them. Once you hit a certain age, people aren't going to curl up with you and tell you that everything is okay.
More constructively, so I'm not being a total fucking dick, maybe get a puppy, or a cat? That can help with affection.
>>17277276
>There's a bunch of shit in life that you're going to want and aren't going to have. And "cuddles" are one of them.
You're forgetting this is not a "want", this is a "need". That's why it's called hunger. We all need physical contact, this literally makes you avoid certain illnesses and lowers your levels of stress.
You're literally telling me to live without water. Yes, I'm not going to die, but my life will turn to shit.
>>17277284
It's not a need. This is why I'm calling you a faggot.
You will still live. You will still literally survive if you stop whining. Sure, your psychology websites will tell you that your health isn't so great, but it's not like you have failing kidneys, you "in general" have worse health.
Your cuddles aren't keeping you from living a long, fruitful life. Get a job, work out, meet a girl or something. Go have a good long cry, whatever it takes.
Your life isn't going to turn to shit because no one will cuddle you. Grow a fucking backbone.
Just backing you up OP saying cuddles are awesome and something to yearn for. Don't let that dork drag you down.
>>17277289
>It's not a need.
I'm sorry professionals and experts disagree with you.
>Grow a fucking backbone.
I'm sorry but I really cannot take any of your words. Your aggressive demeanor and your macho mindset makes me think your advice is better suited for like minded individuals.
>>17277309
Thank you very much for the support!
>>17277318
Enjoy your online hugbox, then. Peace out.
>>17277318
Qualified medfag here
Not all professionals agree it's a need per se
I think you have other, wider issues that need to be addressed
Find me "cuddle hunger" as a diagnosis in the latest DSM (the authority on psychiatric diseases)
(Spoiler: don't waste your time)
You're lonely, OP. Cuddles temporarily relieve this state, so you attribute your loneliness to this.
Consider, for example, a time when you've had a headache from dehydration. Paracetamol (acetaminophen if you're American) will relieve the headache, but the underlying issue isn't a "need" for paracetamol... It's dehydration
Opie are you me? Girl here and I'm unfortunately super affectionate. It really makes a LDR hard. I'd cuddle the shit out of you if it wasn't considered emotional cheating. I love to hug and touch! So starved for affection. Sorry I don't have any advice. I know how bad it feels
>>17277346
Let's suppose for a moment it's not a need per se, because I want to take your last two paragraphs.
>You're lonely, OP. Cuddles temporarily relieve this state, so you attribute your loneliness to this.
>Consider, for example, a time when you've had a headache from dehydration. Paracetamol (acetaminophen if you're American) will relieve the headache, but the underlying issue isn't a "need" for paracetamol... It's dehydration
Although you're right, I also feel the craving for physical contact. My mother and sisters sometimes push me away and it feels awful. If it's not skin hunger I don't know what it is.
>>17277365
>It really makes a LDR hard
Yes, it does!! Even when I'm loyal as fuck, lack of physical intimacy is very draining.
I'd cuddle you too. I love to hug and touch as much as you do, and it really feels pretty well that I'm not alone in this, especially with the opposite gender.
>>17277371
You are not alone in this. Glad I'm not either.
What state do you live in?
>>17277390
I don't live in the US, sadly... Wish it was any different too!
Unless there was some contact info you'd wish to give away...?
>>17277371
>Although you're right, I also feel the craving for physical contact. My mother and sisters sometimes push me away and it feels awful. If it's not skin hunger I don't know what it is.
Way to completely ignore what the guy says.
Here >>17277318 you say medical professionals disagree with a poster in order to affirm what you want to believe, so here >>17277346 a medical professional tells you you're wrong and now you're saying you disagree with the medical professional because it doesn't give you the affirmation you want to prove that you're right.
You want us to believe that, if you were to live alone in an apartment and given basic necessities such as food and water, that you would be found dead one day and your autopsy would reveal that the cause of death was lack of hugs.
That's some weapons grade autism.
>>17277406
I'm not ignoring it. I totally acknowledge "skin hunger" isn't a condition that's widely agreed upon, and moreover it doesn't appear in the DSM.
>You want us to believe that, if you were to live alone in an apartment and given basic necessities such as food and water, that you would be found dead one day and your autopsy would reveal that the cause of death was lack of hugs.
Way to ignore what I am saying, too.
Although you did get a chuckle out of me.
Fine, it may not be a medically recognized need. But one thing is true: I am feeling damn starved, and I know for a fact this isn't something I and only I feel.
>>17277398
It'd probably be impossible to meet unless you lived within 100 miles from me. I can drive. I just don't have the funding. Or rather I do, but I'm saving up for something
Do you have any pets? I know it's not the same but, animals sometimes like to hug
>>17277473
>It'd probably be impossible to meet unless you lived within 100 miles from me.
I don't even live 100 miles from the US, so we're outta luck here...
>Do you have any pets? I know it's not the same but, animals sometimes like to hug
No, I sadly don't, and I currently cannot have one due to rl shenanigans. The house is too small, and it's temporary.
If you are really desperate and you really really want get some cuddles (haters be damned)
Go to a strip club and pay for one.
I've done it before,
Fuck you haters. I was a semi pro gambler and I got sick of being stood up for dates and the failed attempts at finding a gf.
It was my money and I spent it in a way that made me happy for a little while.
But, anyways OP, if you can get creative you might find a solution.
>>17277512
As much a I hate to admit it, your idea sounds good. Although do you mean I should also get the sex from this?
>>17277514
Well, sometimes, some strippers are also whores. Yes literal whores who will do anything for money.
Often times though, they'll cuddle you for $20, might not be as long as you want but, it will be something for some time. Which is better then nothing at all.
>>17277524
No don't expect to get sex from this. If she mentions it and you got the money or whatever fine.
But, just set your expectations to cuddle and you should walk away satisfied.
It's gonna be okay.
>>17277524
>>17277526
Fair enough, I have zero experience with or knowledge about strippers so sorry about the question.
I shall look around until I find something, I guess. That'll work!
>>17277531
Its okay and I'll help break it down a bit further.
>Go to local strip club,
>Have cash on hand.
>Pretty much every strip club I've ever been in.
(I've been in a handful, not exactly proud of that either but, whatever)
>If you're shy, sit there and wait for them to come to you.
>If you're not shy, go up to a friendly looking girl.
>She should have that warm vibe to her.
>State your intention.
>Offer her money for it.
>If she says no, try again with a different girl.
Tips.
>Try to go on a slow night, Friday and Saturday nights will be packed.
>Try asking for a long hug.
>Don't go falling for her. Hell some strippers have bf's/husbands.
>Best not to be a repeat customer because it can get addictive.
You're welcome and good night
>>17277545
Thank you very much. Will see if this is possible to do for me!
>>17277225
In NYC there's a group that wears tee shirts that say FREE HUGS and that's what they do all for a few hrs each day--male and female--they give out free hugs. Maybe you can start something like this where you're at or look into whether or not you can do something like this...
>>17277225
I have a similar desire for platonic affection. I don't really know what to tell you except that a lot of it is just luck of the draw on who you meet and just slowly exploring affection as you go.
If your problem is having friends and developing a social network, get clean, get well-dressed (ie: things that fit, no 'clever' graphic t-shirts and baggy jeans, no fedora/trenchcoat shit, not being overdressed or underdressed for an occasion), and just practice being relaxed and talking to people like you already know them, but are just finding out more about them.
Practice, patience, and a friend or two who can set you up with situations leaning in your favor (such as inviting people they think might be into being your friend to a party and then making sure to give you a window to talk to them) will carry you far. Don't go into a friendship with cuddle partner as the goal, go into it with friendship as the goal and then see if the option for affection manages its way to the table from there.
I'm a mid 20s single and I alleviate my cuddle cravings by getting a massage once every few weeks. I also pat or cuddle my housemate's dog everyday. Don't psychobabble yourself into thinking you deserve cuddles or whatever because unrealistic expectations of other people are what keep you miserable.
