![lonelinessbench[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/9o6vjYa.jpg "lonelinessbench[1].jpg")
How do you deal with loneliness? I can't get into a relationship with anyone. By that I mean, any time in the near future.
>20 year old kissless virgin
>At least a year of hard training before I'm an attractive weight
>A couple of months to get rid of acne
>Who knows how long to overcome social anxiety
>Have no bridges or connections to meet people
It's clear that I'm not going to be in "desirable" any time soon, yet alone have a gf. I'm working on those things but it won't be another year at least before I have a chance, and that's IF I don't cave and give up. That seems like an unfathomably long time from now. I need tips on dealing with the hard loneliness in meantime.
Keep working yourself.
I was in the exact position you were in. I went to the gym and worked on myself when it came to social interactions.
All it did was get me into an abusive relationship and a ltr where I am miserable. My grades dropped and the little bit of drive I had in my hobbies are gone.
Instead of thinking that getting into a relationship will provide your happiness, find it by yourself.
>>17260280
I've been working myself all my life. I don't know how some people can say relationships won't provide happiness to someone who's lonely and wants to be in a relationship.
I'm actually envious of you that you got into a relationship despite being abusive. I'd rather have that experience of being in a relationship, even if it's crappy, than not having one at all. At least I know in myself that I'm desirable to someone, not a completely hideous loser.
Your post doesn't really provide anything meaningful. "Find happiness by yourself." Okay, how? That's what I'm asking.
Learn to get over your animal desires and just focus on your own improvement.
Find a hobbie and direct your energy towards it. Playing music, a sport, traveling, learning languages, reading. There is more to life than breeding, and hobbies like those will allow you to meet many wonderful people.
Your not desirable because of your personality at this point just read what you wrote, you don't even like yourself so why would anyone else? I use to think like you before I understood that women and relationships are not the be all end all.
Love yourself first
>>17260313
>>>17260280 (You)
>I've been working myself all my life. I don't know how some people can say relationships won't provide happiness to someone who's lonely and wants to be in a relationship.
>I'm actually envious of you that you got into a relationship despite being abusive. I'd rather have that experience of being in a relationship, even if it's crappy, than not having one at all. At least I know in myself that I'm desirable to someone, not a completely hideous loser.
>Your post doesn't really provide anything meaningful. "Find happiness by yourself." Okay, how? That's what I'm asking.
All the feelings you have right now will still be there when you get in a relationship. And I'm in a new r/s now with a much better girl and I am still miserable.
The loneliness, lack of self esteem, etc will always be there, regardless of being single or not. It also gets worse because you are afraid of losing them.
To find happiness you have to not rely on anybody else to give you self worth. Make the changes you need to be happy. Look for good friends instead, they are worth a lot more IMO.
>>17260335
I had hobbies but I quit all of them because I had nobody to share it with. I mean, I had friends who liked my work, but I'm so used to it now I don't care anymore.
I literally don't care about anyone who regards me as a friend. I have plenty of friends. I don't need any more. I'm not looking to meet friends. I'm looking to find love.
Still can't wrap my head around why people say they very thing I'm looking for won't make me happy. In that case why dose ANYONE IN THE WORLD get into relationships, if not to be happy?
>>17260374
>why dose ANYONE IN THE WORLD get into relationships, if not to be happy?
There are a lot of reasons.
To get economic security from their partner. To get sex. Well I guess those may also account for "to be happy".
>>17260374
>relationships are about happiness
It sounds like you haven't learnt how to make yourself happy yet. If you can't make yourself happy, why would you expect anyone else to? Why would your future partner be happier with you instead of staying single? Not saying to stay single forever, just sort out your own life first.
Relationships are great when you meet the right person.
>am depress, frustrated, lonely, ect
the only cure for that is to improve yourself
too many people use relationships as a crutch for self-esteem, makes them into toxic and dependent people
you're doing great imo
>figured out exercising is a go
>figured out need to over soc anx
>>17260269
how do I deal with loneliness
well I go to work I drive around the country with the music up
when im home I put on head phones and have more music pumped into my skull
some times I mite have a drink or 2 numb the pain a little
but at night when I go to sleep it some times creeps up on me
