hi /adv/...
i need your help here especially from people who did self cutting or dealt with loving ones that did self harm
ive been with my gf since senior year of high school now that's 3 years now and because of life we went to different unis soo its been distance relationship for 2 years when i meet her after a couple of months being together i saw some scars on my gf's thighs it was surprising coz i never knew she did that shit and never heard about it i managed to make her stop cutting herself.
she did that without a reason her family is good with her,she has no social life problems, i never hurt her and her weight looks are all great. but now she started cutting again without no reason at all i ask her why do you cut yourself
she just replies i dont know.
im pretty sure she doesn't do that for attention coz she always cut her thighs and always hid the scars and she's ashamed of the scars no body knows that she cuts herself she never told anyone about it not even me even i found out myself.
soo i ask you people who had similar problems please help me out here
pic related
sorry for the graphics
i just wanted you all see what im dealing with
the thing about cutting is that at least for me, it's something i'm deeply frustrated and troubled about that i simply can't express. i'm 31 and i cut this year because of my marriage troubles. i don't have anyone to talk to and talking to spouse just results in an escalated fight that i don't have the energy for.
if everything seems "okay" and she's cutting, then it's obviously not okay. she's putting up a front and expressing her frustration in secret.
just talk to her about it and make her feel supported but without pressure. don't make her problems about you.
>>17257458
thanks anon.
it's really frustrating, i wish i could help. I'll try my best to figure out this mysterious problem she has.
what really bothers me is that we are not close to each other, i dont know about her daily life.
so what are you saying is that only big problems makes you think of cutting again or just small daily issues can do that too?
You just say if you don't stop cutting you'll leave her. . There is nothing to benefit from self mutilation. Tell her if she wants help you'll give it but you're not going to stand by for this behaviour. If somethings the matter she can tell you and if she can't or won't say then there is no point in being with a relationship. If she doesn't care about her own well being she won't care about yours.
I didn't cut, but I burned myself for a little while. I got an endorphin rush from it that made me temporarily feel much better. It's giving her some kind of relief, but she might legitimately not know why she needs it. I'm often upset for no good reason, I have a mood disorder.
Has she sought mental health services in the past? She might benefit from medication, or even just talking to a therapist/counselor.
>>17257487
I agree. It sounds horrible but seriously cut your losses and get out. She's got mental problems and frankly she'll suck the light and joy right out of your life. It's not worth it.
>>17257494
no she didn't seek mental health and i dont think she will agree with that
>>17257487
>>17257501
thanks for the advice.
im afraid if i do that she will just lose it and whatever is happening might go worse. i really dont know what to do
i guess seeking professional help is my best option
