No BS Advice
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice
What the title says.
>>16486116
So what are yah selling then?
good, i definitely need some solid, forthright advice from knowledgeable and experienced people. please be outspoken, but do take into account that changing anything takes time and i can't jump to a different mental state in a matter of minutes, hours or even days.
i have posted this in another thread already, but might as well try here:
how do you deal with the realization that you deeply love a girl whom you have known forever already (literally speaking about a decade)?
how do you deal with looking at older pictures with that new realization?
how do you deal with that decade long emptiness that could have been so full - and if it simply were the knowledge that it might have worked out or not. the "not-knowing"/nescience/ignorance is what's tearing me apart... and going back on our messages, i see so many signs now... how could i have been so blind???
how do i approach her about it? not at all?
i feel like i have to apologize or overwhelm her with my feelings, both which is obviously totally wrong!
it hurts! it fucking hurts so much it's killing me. i feel like have i wasted an endless chain of opportunities and i want to cry my eyes out...
I got 2 turkeys and a duck stuck on the I-5 round south with a cradle of hickory and ya aunt jemina's mixes down the rear. Port side's a coming and we still 8 rounds shorter than we's though.
What's the square side of the barn in moonlight got to be?
>>16486136
I guess I am trying to whore the emotions of those asking for help for a short term satisfaction deriving form being able to respond to their petty pedestrian problems.
Or, under the optimistic assumption, it's just something to distract myself with while I do some other shit, without being so entertaining that it draws me from it for long periods of time.
>>16486144
> knowledgeable and experienced people.
where do you think we are.....
>>16486158
i know, man. just goes to show how fucking desperate i am.
sometimes there is really good advice on this board though
>>16486145
bump
>>16486144
The answer is the same as to every other "Like girl wut do" thread on here in the past decade - either you make some move or you don't. But the right answer is make a move, and soon.
Basically, shut the fuck up about all your feelings, etc. I recommend just making some sort of cliché move, e.g. moving close to her while watching a movie or something. If she is repulsed by the idea, you will know.
Asking directly has several drawbacks that I am too lazy to go into, but it just generally makes things awkward unless you are an amazing balla, which you aren't.
Chances are she doesn't like you like that and your friendship will end after you make the move. You should go into this with that expectation.
>>16486145
bump for no BS
>>16486176
this implies that i see her regularly.
i probably would if we lived in the same area. but we don't.
so what do i do?
>>16486208
Do you talk to her? If you do, you should tell her you want to visit. This means you have to pay your own way though, or at least not cause an inconvenience to her. If you can't afford to do that, you are not in a position to make any sort of move. If you can, then the plan remains the same. Hang out with her when you visit, make your move, get rejection/acceptance.
>>16486145
bumpin
>>16486229
i will definitely visit in the near future.
we talk sometimes, yes. we kissed not too along ago, we talked more since, but it's become more silent again. she might have gotten a vibe from me...
but the real struggle for me is having to deal with the past... i don't know how i can move further from this
I think maybe I don't want to kill myself, but how do I find love and happiness and good things if I'm stupid, ugly, and awkward to a painful point?
>>16486286
If you are kissing, you have some sort of chance at least.
>>16486293
You don't. You need to try to change those things. Do you know exactly how stupid you are, did you have your IQ measured? Is there anything preventing you from working out? Your age/financial situation?
Again, the answer is you don't, but the question is whether you are at a point of no return.
How do i feel like not punching myself in the face with a brick everytime i talk to the girl i like?
Every single time we hang out alone i end up saying or doing something embarassing.
Then i keep reliving that moment in my head again and again and again and i feel worse each time.
Sometimes i avoid her because i know im gonna fuck up eventually.
Also, what do normal people do to avoid awkward silences?
>>16486324
1. Talking to girls is just practice. When you do it enough (especially with a positive outcome), you get used to it and you stop being shy. When I was a kid, I worked in a call center and then later at some sales jobs. You talk to so many people, you lose any sort of shyness. Of course, it's not the same with the girl you are madly in love with, but it's the main thing that helps. Obviously job conversations =/= personal conversations, you need more of those too.
2. Awkward silences are generally a sign of overstaying your welcome or having nothing to say. It's very hard to force conversation. If you have to be with them, and have nothing to say, just shut the fuck up (e.g. driving somewhere together). If you don't have to be with them, just leave.
In general, you will learn to rant some bullshit until the convo goes into auto mode, but that assumes you have something in common. That's why just picking up girls is so difficult - they know there's nothing you could possibly want from them other than sex.
>>16486318
I'm 27 and have no money live at home. GED no college.
How do I deal with my boyfriend who has bipolar depression and doesn't trust me for shit.
>>16486501
stop being untrustworty
>>16486481
You should probably go into programming. Start with QA testing first. It's the one decent job you can get if you know what you are doing. Obviously don't expect magic and you will have to work your ass off, but it's doable. That's not to say your life won't be shit for the next 4-5 years, but it's probably one of the few realistic ways out of shit.
I heard similar about electrician programs, but I can't verify that and it seems to be a crapshoot.
>>16486501
I dunno. How much to pour water on his underwear while he sleeps and claim he is pissing himself and slowly drive him insane?
