>been in long term relationship with bf (almost 6 years)
>feel loved, and give my loves to him
>he acts like an edgelord or like its a direct hit to his masculinity to say that he loves me
>usually just jokingly denies that he loves me
>but known him long enough to know his joke/sarcasm voice
>he's extremely affectionate with me
>does things that show me he loves and cares
>literally feels like my best friend/lover
It feels strange to be in a relationship this long and we've never vocally said we love each other.
I don't know what to think of this? Is it okay to be in a healthy, loving relationship in which we do not say I love you. Sometimes I feel like we should say it, but nonetheless we are happy and comfortable. It also makes me slightly insecure about how serious our relationship is.. He has honestly told me that he feels like he cannot love anyone until at least 7+ years into a relationship.
Also, more recently he's been talking about things like marriage, moving in together, eventually having children. Which sends me some mixed messages... Also, if it helps, I'm 24, he's 27.
What does an outsider have to say? (also pic unrelated)
>>17234294
He sounds emotionally immature.
My sister is with her bf since 5 years and they have two kids. I don't know the exact stats, but it took them many years till they finally said "i love you". Some people are just weird af with those words. Bf and i said it after 4 months and have told us every day since then. I'd say son't compare your relationship to others. If both of you are happy with how things are, it's alright. Y'know, don't fix something that isn't broken.
If it bothers you, tell him.
>>17234301
He's always been like a turtle in it's shell regarding his serious, deep emotions towards things. He also believes things like actions speak louder than words.
Plus, his friends still joke that anything cutesy or boyfriend-like he does for me is "gay" which is annoying. In that sense, around me and to our female friends, he calls me my pet names and says cutesy things about me. With male friends, he calls me his "lady" and tries to act really masculine.
So that's kind of an idea on how he feels the need to be extremely masculine.
>>17234312
I know I shouldn't compare. To me, saying "I love you" is just the top of the line way to express your love for someone. I think he feels like it's a word that is tossed around too much and doesn't necessarily mean anything without actions to back it up.
A conversation came up with our friends and bf and I just said we never say I love you. Everyone thought it was bizarre. Made me feel a little uncomfortable...
>>17234294
If he cant even say a phrase to confirm his affection and is somehow wanting more
> kids, marriage, family, house
then expect a shitty proposal as well as a mediocre life where your task is to tend his needs.
Is that what you want? you will be more like a mother to him than a fiance and that will mold your of personality,
a friend of mine had a bf that also seemed reluctant to grow up, she and him took some off time (2-3years), still speaking to eachother and in the end they went back together as he started to figure himself out and what he wanted from life.
so thats my advice, give your bf time to grow up and yourself to think about what your goals are in life.
