so my girlfriend got into a fight last Halloween with a friend she made in college. Long story short someone was called a slut and they stopped being friends.
The problem is it has been 8 months since this occurred and my gf still has problems with this girl coming over to converse with me or me going to hang out with this girl. My gf wants me to sever all ties with my friend because of Halloween.
the problem gets worse as even if I wanted to sever ties I couldn't because my family is financially supporting my friend and I have to meet her and buy her groceries, gas, and pay her rent to ensure she is okay.
Basically how do I fucking fix this? My gf said to be patient about this but holy shit I wasn't expecting it to take a god damn year. And she keeps pushing for me to stop being friends with her when I tell her it's not possible.
What happened at Halloween?
>>17218496
>because my family is financially supporting my friend and I have to meet her and buy her groceries, gas, and pay her rent to ensure she is okay.
Why would this be? I imagine in such a situation there must be some sort of bond. Do you like her? For that matter, how much do you really like your girlfriend?
>>17218501
college town so the friend that my girlfriend hates had some friends come over. One of them I had dated for 2-3 months which made my gf nervous because an ex of hers cheated on her.
basically I was the DD because I had homework and shit and they went out partying in the frat and sorority houses. I came to pick them up at 3 in the morning and I was stressed as all hell. my ex came up and said she missed me and my stupid brain panicked and I talked with my gf about it afterwards. She proceeded to talk about how my ex was hoeing it up evidently. This pissed off my friend who said some not so nice things about my gf. This went on for 1-2 weeks before I managed to coordinate them enough to get them to apologize. My friend has gotten over it from what I can tell and doesn't give a fuck. my gf not so much.
>>17218514
>This pissed off my friend who said some not so nice things about my gf.
And you just... accepted this? I wouldn't want someone like that to be in my SO's life either.
>>17218506
> I imagine in such a situation there must be some sort of bond
she's poor as hell and my mother once lived in that situation. She talked with her about it and eventually said she would support her at college. She is also the friend of my ex so there is that odd bond as well.
>how much do you really like your girlfriend?
I like her quite a bit as we have been dating for nearly 2 years and most things have been quite nice except this, her recent sickness, and her lack of socializing because of said sickness.
>>17218519
>And you just... accepted this?
I made them both back down in the vain hope they could become friends again. Was there a better option?
>>17218525
Do you actually see nothing wrong with what your friend did or something? Why do I get the feeling you care about your friend more than your girlfriend?
>>17218520
Do you imagine yourself spending your life with your girlfriend? I'm personally a proponent of the idea that girlfriends are expendable and that it isn't worth keeping the company of anyone that is slightly unagreeable, but if you think differently that's fine too.
Have you tried locking the two in a room and not letting them out until they reach some kind of treaty? It's what all the sitcom people do when they have two close people who need to make amends.
>>17218530
If that's the case then i would certainly entertain the possibility of a relationship with the poor chick. It could be risky though. It could ruin your relationship as it is and make your food runs a living hell for both parties. Worth it? You decide.
>>17218531
>Do you imagine yourself spending your life with your girlfriend?
yes for quite a while I have felt that she fits all that I want in life and will help me explore new things.
>Have you tried locking the two in a room and not letting them out until they reach some kind of treaty? It's what all the sitcom people do when they have two close people who need to make amends.
my gf can barely stomach sitting near her. I managed to get them to watch a movie with my family and they seemed to hit it off quite well. But even after that my gf still hates her. I honestly think once my gf makes more friends she'll move on but because of how sick she has been she hasn't been able to socialize as well. Her disease started hitting hard around October and she has maybe 1 friend who barely hangs out with her.
>>17218530
>Do you actually see nothing wrong with what your friend did or something?
no she fucked up but I didn't want to end the friendship as I thought it was fixable. They both said shit to each other since they are both sassy fucks and I hoped it could be brought to where they would at least be acquaintances.
>Why do I get the feeling you care about your friend more than your girlfriend?
It could be. I honestly hate ending friendships or relationships as I fear being alone. I took both of their opinions in when discussing it and got them to some middle ground. I don't want the friendship to end over this but I want my girlfriend to feel better and her aim is clearly to end the friendship.
You're cheating, aren't you OP?
>>17218568
nope, never cheated in my life. trust me that friend isn't hot nor worth cheating for.
>>17218539
I wouldn't have you choose between the destitute friend and the girlfriend with the terminal illness. Maybe the friend hasn't actually said sorry for the slut-calling? I'd have her meet your gf and have her formally apologize. If your gf still holds the grudge she's crazy.
Punch the girl that called yours a slut in the mouth
>>17218571
>I'd have her meet your gf and have her formally apologize
I'm worried about asking either of them trying to apologize. But I might ask and see if my gf is willing to accept an apology and move forward.
>>17218573
my gf called my ex a slut so who do I punch?
my friend just called my gf a liar and a bitch from what I can recall
>>17218577
It seems you already know what to do. What would be stopping you?
>>17218578
Who means more to you?
To me a friend I've had will always be > than some sex
Obviously this is in this situation
>>17218584
if given the option I want to pick neither.
>>17218583
yeah may as well. I already know my gf is going to bring it up tomorrow she texted me about it.
>>17218589
Be a man and tell your woman that she has no place fighting with your friend and vice versa
How old are you 15?
>>17218593
>Be a man and tell your woman that she has no place fighting with your friend and vice versa
against two extremely sassy and possibly insane women? that would net me another ex gf and possibly an ex friend.
>>17218496
You sound like a horrible boyfriend. If you're serious about your relationship you shouldn't be spending time with this friend of yours. If you were my partner (I'm male) I'd ditch you in a heartbeat. I've got better things to do than waste my time on a partner that dotes around other males that would sit and insult me. Honestly, when you it into perspective like that, if she had male friends who ask her out partying and chauffer them around late at night with other male friends she'd fucked, there would be so many red flags popping that she'd find her stuff at the door and told to pick it up. To top it off you're acting like the GF is the issue here for not liking the scenario you're putting her in instead of looking at the scenario you've created for her. Completely selfish.
>>17218578
I dunno if your gf is a liar, but she was definitely being an insecure little bitch when she called your ex a ho.
>Montaigne was right after all
