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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 982. page
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Okay guys so I was cooking ramen in my microwave and long story short, I burned it. Now the smoke hangs in the air and I cannot get t to dissipate. I'm selling my house soon and this could call everything off. Is there anything I can do to fix this?
10 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Open a fucking window.
>>
>>17017093
How the fuck did you manage to own property?
>>
Open all windows, and the microwave. If your kitchen has a window, set up a fan so it is blowing air out of the window and sucking air from the kitchen out.

Leave them open for a day, preferably longer if you can. If you have a screen door and are going to be home, open that, too. You want to aerate your house.

Then try cooking something else with a nice strong smell. Garlic, fresh bread. There's also a nice recipe here for stuff to make your house smell amazing.

http://fuckingrecipes.tumblr.com/post/42644413645/do-you-have-company-coming-over-but-your-house

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>senior prom is in a few hours
>No one to go with, no friends
>Dad is probably going to explode with shame and dissapointment when I stay home and play video games on Prom night
Tell me what to do you fuckers. Besides drinking it away
17 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17017072
go to the movies
>>
>>17017072
go watch a movie, you'll feel like a loner but you would've in any situation.
>>
Heads up prom is a scam. It's basically just become a business that revolves around people wasting tons of money on one night that doesn't even matter. Me and my friends stayed home on prom too. My girlfriend went despite me explaining to her it's a scam. After spending hundreds of dollars on a dress, a limo, etc., she told me prom was pretty boring and a waste of money.

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The only boner I've had in the past 10 weeks is when I have to piss badly.

I'm mildly concerned that my sex drive varnished. I went from 6 fap/fucks a day to 0. Just from cutting my self from tech and people with my fetishis.

I'm afraid that my Columbus complex to always fap to new ideas has gone too far. It's already not normal, but its becoming immoral.
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Do you drink?
>>
>>17017031
Used to. I also haven't drank in awhile.

Kind of went through a purge of sins for a few weeks, but now its over.
>>
>dick is broken
>asking a Taiwanese finger painting trading board instead of a medical professional for help

I'll let you figure out where you're fucking up

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I need a 1200 word paper written, which thread should I post on to get someone to write it for me? how will the transaction happen?
44 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016967
By when on what topic
>>
>>17016967
>>17016984
Natehuggins41@Gmail send me the requirements and the topic or topic list. I'm leaving the thread for a bit
>>
within 10 days, on a comparison between 'A brave new world' and 'a scanner darkly'

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cooking advice?
student here, i can cook but every time i do i end up spending so much money on ingredients 'cause i have no essentials, so i'll need to buy milk for one recipe and then never use it again.

how can i solve this problem and improve my food budget?
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016937

mostly by planning your meals out a week in advance. you dont necessarilly have to eat it in a specific order, but you should be eating most everything on your list that week.

if you buy milk for a recipe, consider other recipes that have milk. if you cant find any, consider having cereal as a dessert or breakfast and use milk for that.
>>
>>17016937
You can freeze milk, you know. But seriously, who the fuck doesn't use milk?
>>
>>17016949
not many things i like/can make require milk

>>17016946
i guess thats the best option, i don't know if i'm organised enough to actually do it

I've been with my current gf for 8 months. There's nothing wrong with the relationship, but I feel as if I want more- it's just pure selfishness.

How do I bring up the subject of an open relationship with her? Sometimes it's coworkers or classmates and I wish I could try at them. I realize there's always a risk with bringing it up, but I just want to know if any anons have experience bringing up the subject or how best to go about it.
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Breake up with her and kill yourself
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>>17016929

im a believer in open relationships. however, if you are bringing it open after you are already in a relationship, its a disaster. it just signals the beginning of the end. so by all means, you might as well do it so you can enjoy it while it lasts assuming she doesnt break up with you on the spot.

the best approach is to have a discussion about fantasies and sex and partners, and ask her if theres anyone in her life she'd like to sleep with. then transition into
>if i let...
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>>17016929
>open relationship
>wanting your gf to deep throat big black cocks
>wanting to be a cuck

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-Lost virginity with a hooker!?!

Guys i have 18 years old, good social life, but i am thinking a
will be 1h30, she will come i will be nervous, will start with a blowjob until a cum, we take a shower or eat something, and then we fuck. i will use condom and blablablalbalbla
i will bring her to my house, both of them is from another city, i need cons and pros please!
[I ok with a thick women, just want to try and know myself]bout losing my virginity with a hooker, not a street prostitute, but with a cleaner one.
I want your opnion on this plan
I have 2...
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17 replies and 6 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Show us the bitches.
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>>17016893
ok i will show. I live on a small town, soo the "Good" with not hiper expensive or from another town far far away is not sooo pretty
>>
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This is one, she has 27 years old 1,68 and 72 kg

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got into a car accident. I got out of the car, took a picture of their license plate. the girl refused to give my her license and insurance, but she insisted on calling her mom. Out of nowhere, her mom shows up, so I'm assuming they lived around that area. Anyways, the mom started bitching at me saying there weren't any damages and threatening her husband was a cop and shit. Anyways, they took off. Had to chase them for a while but I lost them.
I have their license plate, can the police or my insurance do anything with it like track their address? I know for sure...
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12 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016849
Of course they can. Report the cunts asap
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>>17016857
>Report the cunts asap
THIS. What they did was illegal. I would get in contact with a lawyer first, get some professional advice.
>>
>>17016849
Leaving the scene of an incident or something like that.
Call your insurance company asap and tell them everything you know. Before the other party blames it on you.

I have really bad acne, eye bags, and pale skin. I know I'd be much more attractive and have less anxiety if I didn't have all these things.

What do I do? Pic is pretty similar to what my skin looks like at the moment.
14 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
gain 20 pounds
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>>17016848
What? Shouldn't losing 20 lbs be a much better idea? I have love handles.
>>
>>17016856
oh really? got any pics

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im so confused about the logic on this site.

why would any girl think they are special to you if you pretty clearly state that you'd settle for any girl who'd be your gf?
14 replies and 4 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016827
I have not seen that logic anywhere on this site, I have no idea what you're talking about
>>
>>17016829

people whining about how its impossible to get a gf and that they'd settle for anyone. sometimes with the condition that they just not be 'morbidly obese'.

its an hourly occurrence here.
>>
>>17016827
go back your cave and keep folding your japanese steel

I'm in a situation here.

Last Year
>My girlfriend of 2-3 years and I broke up
>On good terms, I was graduating college, she had a year left. I had a really good job offer out here in San Francisco, we decided to not do a LTR and end it "for now"

Fastward to now
>Met this other girl at some local thing
>We started texting a lot and hanging out
>Started dating like a week ago
>Her...
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6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016817
Why dont we talk about how great DFA 1979 is instead?
>>
Whatever you do make sure you keep lying to everyone close to you.
>>
Don't get back with your ex. They're your ex for a reason. Try new things, don't take steps backwards. I had an ex that did that shit to me a few times. Fucked my head up good.

Don't. Fucking. Go. Back.

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My fiancee is obese. I've expressed to her my desire for her to lose weight for nearly two years. We're now getting married soon and she's lost only ~10 lbs. in the entire last year. This is by no means a reason to call it off, but I'm tired of breaking my back making myself look good, having money, and taking care of OUR important life tasks when she can't even take care of her body.

It's insane. I'm going to fuck other women if this continues. I've told her that. If I can't get it from her, then I'll get it from somebody...
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32 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016738
Mammia mia this is some fresh pasta
>>
>>17016738
What does her being overweight have to do with fucking other women? Is she not putting out, or are you grossed out by her appearance?
>>
>>17016740
Grossed out is strong. I would say, less attracted to.

We're still young enough to enjoy a healthy sex life. When she's panting, sweating, and stumbling around ungracefully because of her weight it can quickly kill a boner. It's a cleanliness thing too.

It's not super upsetting most of the time, but Jesus if anything else goes wrong that day, the last thing I want to be confronted with is her lack of self-control. It's demotivating.

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Alright, so I fucked up big time.
>lost my driving license some time ago just because I had a few beers with mates before driving
>do burn-outs in a shopping center car park while waiting for a mate
>accidentally crash into the pavement
>the motor is all bashed up
>stay in the car
>cops approach
>I tell them that I'm just waiting for a mate
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6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
you're a fucking idiot
>>
>>17016731
Likely fines. I highly doubt you'll do time.
>>
>>17016731

>lie to cop
>publicly drunk and bringing attention to yourself
>destroy car

Holy shit you're dumb.

What does it mean when you bring up the possibility of furthering a few dates into a relationship (making it official) and the girl says "let's just go with the flow, see what happens"

I'm not new to bullshit, to me this sounds exactly like it, what are your thoughts /adv/
7 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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She's willing to keep trying, but doesn't want to rush it.
>>
>>17016709
Oh and it's probably a positive sign. If she didn't want it, she'd reject the idea now, not later.

Or she's just bullshitting you into sacking a few more Chads dicks before going steady.
>>
>>17016700
>What does it mean when you bring up the possibility of furthering a few dates into a relationship (making it official)

I don't know because I can't even make out what the fuck the first half of your sentence even means you fucking autist. Are you talking about making it official or going on more dates? Pick one, retard, there's a huge fucking difference between dating and being in a relationship.

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any recommendations?

my current one is for hardfloors only (no brush), and I moved to a carpeted apartment. going for best-bang-for buck; nothing shitty, but also dont want to spend $300+ plus unless it really is worth it.
7 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17016695
The best type is wet dry vacuum cleaner.

http://www.ebay.com/bhp/wet-dry-vacuum

This is what you use when you want to get clean anything. Another plus is you don't need paper sacks which are usual super expensive.

These beasts can swallow anything, dirt, rocks, spilled water, anything.
>>
Search online for Panasonic, with a bag, preferably an upright (as opposed to canister since you have carpet everywhere). If you do get a canister, it obviously should have a powered brush head.
>>
>>17016708
>Another plus is you don't need paper sacks which are usual super expensive.
Compared to the increased maintenance needs of bagless vacs, bagged models are usually cheaper in the long term. Plus the expensive ones are usually name brand bought in store. You can find compatible off-brand bags online for dirt cheap.

What you're suggesting is pretty overkill for an apartment IMO, unless you usually drag half of the outdoors into your living room.

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