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File: old paper.jpg (190 KB, 1280x853) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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My parents just had a quarrel and the word divorce got mentioned, what do I do?
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Tell them you got some sweet repeating digits on an anonymous imageboard, that will surely cheer them up...

But really, we need more info than that, OP. Many married couples quarrel and sometimes some of them bring up the topic of divorce without truly meaning it.

Give us some context, OP, if you want any real advice.
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How old are you?
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>>17225222
Kill Yourself.

I'm a guy and I love butch women. 9/10 they turn out to be lesbians. 'Girly girls' turn me off. Honestly a /fit/ woman with a pixie cut is really fucking hot to me.

Is this a symptom of something? Am I gay?
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>>17225211
Kill Yourself.
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>>17225211

maybe. maybe not. i looked at that picture and thought it was a cute guy. i am still looking at it attracted. and i am a gay man.

however that doesnt really make you gay. people dont discuss it much but there is a bit of a 'spirituality' entwined with our sexuality. its the reason some gays cant really go for feminine gay guys no matter how macho their bodies may be. its the same reason you cant be into feminine chicks despite being (presumably) straight.

if you are interested in exploring your sexuality, try it. if you are not, then dont. just dont let the ideas and cultures and opinions associated wtih being gay stop you from exploring.

its okay to be closeted if that is the lifestyle you find more ocmfortable. its okay to just not tell anyone for the first two years you know them. its okay ot wait less or more or not tell em or just say you're not gay and date em anyway.

do whatever makes you comfortable. there are a million thoughts that pass through your head that you dont tell people. your sexuality doesnt have to be stated etiher

keep in mind you can be gay adn not like penis. how do you feel about butts? im gay but i cant really stand penis. i admit i am fond of balls but at most im comfortable jerking ganother guy off. but im all about just playing wtih their nipples and their ass and licking my way up their bodies.
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>>17225230
>how do you feel about butts? im gay but i cant really stand penis.
i'm the opposite desu. butts are gross

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So something crazy happened today which blew (and is still currently blowing) my mind and I just need help.

So basically I've been working at a restaurant for a while now and theres another older staff member (mid 50's who's milf material in my books) who most staff members don't like. But her and I get on great. But then, something happened that pushed our relationship from friendship to something more...physical.

a couple weeks ago during rush hour, I was moving past her and had a stiffy and she leaned into me which surprised me so I grabbed...
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>>17225130
Probably not, but you're in a bit too deep now.

You can back out if you act really autistic and just make her feel like you're not worth her time. Otherwise, fuck her; the outcomes are:

She and you fuck regularly and it's awesome.
She uses her position to force you into weird sex.
She will expect something more: i.e. a relationship.

Also, give this a listen and tell me what you think:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_V_2BFWahc
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>>17225130
There is nothing objectively wrong with you wanting to hit it.

just do it
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>>17225130
do it

but also before you get in really deep just have other options lined up for a job if this one blows up in your face.

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Everyone fucking hates me and nobody wants to be my friend. Needless to say I'm a hugless virgin and I always will be no matter what.

Tell me how to spend my time before I die so I can leave everyone alone. I don't like movies or tv anymore so don't recommend that.

Have a happy puppy because I'm depressed as fuck.
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Adopt a large breed dog (since they're the only ones with a personality) and acknowledge the fact that he'll think you're God. Take the ego boost and run with it.
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>>17225111
>>17225119
And treat that dog like gold. Love him unconditionally, earn his respect, never hit him or yell at him, and most importantly be his bro, and you will have a faithful companion who would die for you.
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>>17225119
>>17225126
I don't want a dog. I have allergies to them and I don't know how long it will be before I kms.

Hey /adv/, how does one learn to suck their own dick w/o breaking their back?

Pic unrelated
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>>17225109

ive always just been able to stick the head in my mouth but i had to do a lot of stretching to do anything more than that

not worth it imo. you can really only feel things in one part of your body at a time and you will be feeling the strain in your back no matter how good you get at it. sucking your own dick is osmething i only ever did to impress other people. never made it work for myself and i never heard of anyone enjoying sucking their own dick.
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>>17225199
I'm just desperate to get some dick in my mouth desu. I just want to know what it's like.
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>>17225226

socal? or maybe new hampshire?

When girls on Tinder say "I'm not into hookups", does that genuinely mean they don't want to hookup, or is it a subconscious filter for spergs who message girls saying 'ey bb lets fuk'
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she's a stuck up bitch that thinks she's better than you. i literally just had a bitch tell me she "doesn't really date people" today. all she had to do was say some bullshit like she had a boyfriend. just think of her as the cunt she is and move on to the next one
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>>17225105

girls are not programs running the same script. by which i mean, each girl is different. all you can get from this is that she doesnt want you to think she is 'not into hookups'.

if you dissect that it means you shouldnt go in saying ;EYY BB LETS FUK'

you thinking you are not a sperg wont change that

for me, i say im not into hook ups, im not 'looking' nad 'i dont know what im looking for' because i dont want to have planned sex. its boring. where is the fun? i love the chase whether its me chasing or him.

when you go straight to the kill its so boring, almost uncomfortable. there is no attempt to enjoy each other as a person.

so if i say 'im not into hookups' in my case im not implying that we have to be comittted and dating.

it just means that im not going to 'hook up'. if we at least feign some sort of date or hang out, then it gets there, thats fine.

but even explaining that takes all the juice out. i dont know why guys wnat to know exactly whats going to go down.
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>>17225151
>but even explaining that takes all the juice out. i dont know why guys wnat to know exactly whats going to go down.

Cause guys are normally the ones who have to pay for the date, plan the date, entertain YOU and do the dance in hoping of you spreading your legs. You literally have to sit there. Guys have to go waaaaaaaaaaay further in putting an effort forward than women ever will save for the uggo hamplanets, can't blame them for wanting SOME peace of mind.

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I moved into a new apartment recently and they use a seperate company for utility billing which of course gave me an account number ending in 666...

yikes

I'm not a total xtian by most measures but some things set me off and this is one of them. I sent a few emails, did some internet searching about that company lots of negative reviews, called their customer service, griped to the apartment manager

The account numbers are automatically generated when a new tenant moves in, so I suggested they click some computer keys and just pretend I moved out &...
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>>17225059
and what I've thought about so far...

Many possibilities:

Just ignore it - I don't think this would work for me because that symbol triggers too much

Change my beliefs - Converting to satanism or some other faith also doesn't work for me

Complain - I did this, politely at first, then more insistent, then irritatingly etc

Do something troublesome - Many negative thoughts here but I'm not a criminal so not happening

Live with it - This doesn't work...
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>>17225059
A lot of businesses will change your account/reference number if it happens to have the numeric string "666" in it somewhere because there are a lot of retards in the world and they realize they have to cater to them.

It's like how most buildings don't have a floor numbered "13": it freaks out the retards.

So make the request again.

Realistically though, the "number of the beast" is "666" (or possibly 616). That's "six hundred sixty...
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Nero, please....

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I have had dry, red, itchy skin all over my body for a long time, and through switching to cold showers, natural soap/shampoo, I have managed to get rid of most of it. However, I still have stuff like the picture on my forehead and hairline. The dermatologist said I just have shitty genetics. Is there anything else I can do to get better skin, on my forehead, and overall?
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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try coconut oil
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>>17225038
ive seen this before, do I just rub the shit all over my body?
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>>17225016
the dermatologist should have recommended you use skin cream

there are zillions of brands, start with something basic like Lubriderm sensitive skin, and smear that on all over your body after showering

dry skin is a health problem and will get worse as you get older (whine)

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How do I make a decent tinder profile? What type of picture should I use? I have a nice body, but don't want to go for the bathroom half-naked-selfie.
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Something that shows you outdoors. Usually the weirdos are the guys who take photos inside at their computer.

girl here btw
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>>17225032
I don't think I really give off the weirdo vibe. But my problem is i don't really take pictures during social settings, so I have virtually no good outdoors pics
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>>17225063
>I don't think I really give off the weirdo vibe
I can feel your weird vibe from here. The way you text, I dunno.

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So my girlfriend has a bisexual friend. They've been friends for ~7 years now and I used to be friends with her as well until it seemed like she didn't like me. I thought nothing of it and just figured that we had lost what we had in common (stopped talking to her after high school).

Well, fast forward 4 years and my best friend and I are having one of our man to man talks. He tells me that his girlfriend, who was the de facto alpha lesbian in high school, told him that my girlfriend's bisexual friend wanted to get with her which is why she didn't like me. She worded it a lot differently, but that's basically it.

My girlfriend hasn't hung out with her friend in a while due to college, work, and her friend subtly blowing her off. So when i heard this I thought nothing of it because it wasn't like she was around anymore. But now she wants to meet up with her and I can't help feeling uncomfortable.

We have a great relationship and she's one of the most loyal persons I know. She's the type of person that will neglect herself to help her friends and make sure everyone she cares about is okay. But she is naive due to her faith in people. She has, in the past, continued friendships with orbiters until they blatantly try to make a move.

I just want to hear some thoughts on this. Would be interested in hearing if anyone else had similar experiences.
9 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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You shouldn't be worried unless you have a reason to not trust your girlfriend. Yeah it does suck when you don't know for sure what she is doing with people who you know like her, but there really isn't anything you can do about it. If it really does bother you that much bring it up to her
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>>17225172
I just don't want her to think I'm trying to take her away from her friends.

Reading this, though, makes a lot of sense and calms me down. It just bothers me that her friend is willing to take advantage of her naivete just to get close to her. It just seems wrong.
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>>17225221
I'm sure you could bring it up without her thinking that, but you would have to choose your words carefully.
It definitely does seem wrong, but I'm sure the truth will eventually come out. And from what it sounds like your girlfriend will just let her friend down gently and not cheat on you or run off with her friend.

I need some help with my youtube channel, can anyone of you guys help me out?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqtRT0JTLPQ
5 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17224957
it seems like you're trying to imitate someone. you'd probably be better off talking in a calm or even monotone voice tbhdesu
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the only person who posts on my videos is a faggot who has multiply accounts and argues with himself

at least 5 out of my 20 subscribers are him
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>>17224978
this

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Hey /adv/, how do you deal with hating someone? I have two people that I cannot stand but have to see everyday. The first one is so autistic that she thinks that we are sisters separated at birth, and then goes on about how she thinks that there is another world and 'Oh anon, you are my sister! Our mother sent me here to help you remember the other world. We can die together and go back!' - and no she really does believes this. She's smells disgusting and doesn't shower and then wants to 'cuddle' but gets offended if I don't want to. The second...
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>people actually complain about having people like them or having friends
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What is your first intial because I swear you sound like a friend of mine who was venting to me about a similar situation.
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>>17225382
I will gladly hand them over to you if I could anon, have fun with your long lost delusional sister who wants to kill you and then herself.

>>17225390
It's A... But I couldn't be that friend, I haven't told anyone about this... I just don't know how to deal with these people anymore

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if you looked at a pic of loli and you're in canada will they find you?
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as in the animated stuff.
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i wanna find you desu
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>>17224812
Yes. I accidentally clicked on a loli thread on /b/, went to court and spent over $50K on lawyer fees to beat the case. Be careful.

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So I wanna make friends but I hate smoking/weed/drugs/getting drunk. Is it still possible to make friends?
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420 it s0n
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>>17224718
No; it's not because you don't do drugs, it's because you're insufferable.
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>>17224738
No I'm cool with people just don't want people smoking around me

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Are Match.com and E-Harmony better or are you just paying for the same shit as OkCupid and Tinder?
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>>17224717
It depends on what you want.
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>>17224722
Not OP, but can you elaborate?
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>>17224717
By paying for a service it weeds out the weirdos a little better.

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