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Tomorrow is my exam day, C1 in German and I've pretty much failed almost every practice test. How do I stay calm, Ive been crying for 3 hours straight and I have to get my shit together to be ready for tomorrow. Any advice?
4 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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You've failed everything , Anon?
At least you've tried haven't you?

You know you can't give up since you came this far.
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>>17289743
>he didn't take French instead

Germoney is the land of immigrants
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>>17289743
C1 is very high already. Breath slowly. You are never going to be able to answer everything correct in the paper, so don't worry if you block on a question. Pass to the next one. Bring food and eat it in the breaks.
Having C2 level on German, English, French and Spanish has taught me those test are little pieces of shit. Consider the points for each question and manage well tour time. And if not, at least you tried.
Good luck.

I don't really know what to do. I'm turning 19 soon and i feel like a complete loser.
I am still a virgin, mostly because i am an idiot and did not use those chicks that liked me back in 9th and 10th grade, because i didn't like them and because i in fact didn't want to use them. I also because kept running after one chick for almost 2 years. She asked me out, then changed her mind, played me basically. I am still not completely over her but i have tried to ask out one chick i was sorta into. She said no, because she is gay. Whether it is truth or not,...
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>>17289730
Bunch of typos,but whatever, fuck it
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>>17289730
>It's another "teenager that thinks his life is over" episode
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>>17289736
Fucking reruns!

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Should I start vaping?

It makes you look like a cunt, but it may help me with my meth addiction.
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>current year
>not joining the vape naysh
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>smoking a battery powered dildo

It'll go nicely with your fedora.
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>>17289746
Better than meth.

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>be me with Gf
>notice a car I like, price not relevant.
>need a car, price is in my range
>call the owner and set up time to look and buy after leaving car to walk around for a bit.
>walk by the car and notice a 26 year old retarded man rubbing up against the car and smearing hand grease and mouth saliva on the car
>tell Gf that it bothers me because I am mostly likely buying the car and as a consumer I don't appreciate Retard McGee unsupervised doing Shit to the car.
>fyi I don't care about Retards one way or the other and I know the Retard lives on the street but does NOT own the car.
>Gf proceeds to tell me it doesn't matter and "quit making a big deal about it"
>tell her why it irritates me. She proceeds to say "he's only looking at the car, its fine." Over and over no matter what.
>I lose my temper at her shenanigans and say "he's not fucking looking, he's just smearing and humping the car. There's a difference."
>proceeds to give me a stereotypical "wow" like she's above the behavior which she is clearly not.
We walk home arguing about how am a bad person.
I don't need your approval /adv/, this is my first time here so give it to me straight. Am I wrong in being uncomfortable with this? I plan on buying the car but it irritates me that the Retard is just smearing Shit all over the car and humping it all day. Was it so wrong to share this feeling with the gf?
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>>17289712
I don't think that you're a bad person, you were just put in a awkward situation. To say the least. You just didn't want some dude smearing his body fluids over your car you're going to get in the near future. Yes, he might have not been able to help it, but anyone would get pissed there. Perfectly understandable.
>>
It's a pretty inconsequential thing to get so worked up about. It's not as if he was keying or smashing the car, he just drooled on it or whatever. It's perfectly fine to get mildly irritated, but it was nothing to have a fight over, are you two gonna argue when a bird shits on the car? Or when mud gathers at the bottom? All of these problems can be resolved by simply throwing some water on it, you did have a bit of an overreaction.

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K I dun goofed up. I have a huge incest fetish (growin up there was a period where my sister sort of sexually abused me - older). Anyways, last night in the middle of fapping, I sent her this message on her facebook. I was just showing her my abs a year ago on phone and she asked me if I wanted her "artistic pics", I said no. How fucked am I?
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>>17289693
hahahahahahaha
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>>17289693
Post her nudes.

Don't forget to spoiler so the snitches won't get butthurt
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>>17289693
>growin up there was a period where my sister sort of sexually abused me - older

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So, advice about anal? The webbing really hurts despite lube. Also more lube always that answer for asshole friction burn? I thought we used a lot. What am I doing wrong? General anal advice?
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>>17289680
Your brain is your sexual organ mainly. If you want to do anal, start with body massage (use olive oil if you don't have anything else). Slowly make your way down and tease. Don't rush it, go around the hole(s). If you see your partner relaxed enough, run your finger around the hole and gently press. Again, this is not a need for speed race. Go back to massage and repeat, going deeper this time. Two fingers, three fingers. Remember that oils don't go well with latex. With my girlfriend we never use...
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>>17290003
Hmm, that will help the friction bit, but what about the webbing bit? That has nothing to do with the hole. Is my butt just wierd?
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>>17289680
>the webbing

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So since I'm a piece of shit and for various other reasons, I'm back at home for a year, and I will be starting college next fall.

Until then, I want to use my massive free time to get develop some useful skills. I need; Ideas for skills that are easily certifiable or commonly used in entry-level positions, help with scheduling a sort of "lesson plan" and the best way to do so, usefull apps or programs to keep me on track or to supplement learning.

So, as a jumping off point, I'm computer-literate but I don't know any programming language....
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>>17289672
>Japanese
This is going to make you look like a huge weeb, and nobody will take it seriously; if you're looking to impress (which, if you're burger, is the only probable use of a language), you should learn a language of the near east (especially one with a foreign alphabet). In particular, Arabic and Russian are now available on Duolingo, which is easy for those who struggle with motivation.

As math is concerned, I'm actually looking to do the same; my plan...
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>>17289839
Edit: Also, nice to see a thread on here that isn't relationshit oriented. Fucking sick of those.
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>>17289839
Mandarin or Spanish is probably the most useful I would say.

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So I fell for a girl. Normally this wouldn't be an issue because I have no problems getting pussy, but she is... complicated.

In certain areas, she's incredibly chill, she laughs at the jokes on her expense, she talks a lot and I've never met anyone more confident than her, yet I have a feeling that she is a very private person underneath it all.

Now I realize I know almost nothing about her life because of the way she always dodges questions. Once she mentioned in front of me that she writes a lot. When I asked her to let me see it, she refused...
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You're dating this girl right?
Ever thought of addressing this with her? Some people are just private; if you feel like you know nothing about her maybe you fell in love with an act she puts up.
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>>17289666
how much time has she had to get used to you? is it a problem if she is a private person? if she isnt just a private person, she may have trust issues or be shy. Make her feel comfortable
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how long have you known her? There are always going to be some things you don't know about a person, no matter how intimately you get to know each other. Hell, people don't even know everything about themselves. Furthermore, revealing your "true self" (however you want to conceive of that) to someone demands a lot of vulnerability. It could be that she's a little insecure (I know you say she's confident, but this can always be a front), or doesn't think she knows you well enough yet. In fact, it could be a good sign; I've known many people...
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is it beta/an embarrassment that I know virtually nothing about cars? I can do dinosaurs.
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>>17289665
Can you at leat drive a car?
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>>17289665
I'm an auto enthusiast and a lot people that think they know anything about cars don't know a damn thing. But anyway, basic car knowledge puts you in the good graces of most women.

t. >/o/
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>>17289665
No. No one gives a fuck. If you don't give a fuck, ain't no one else gonna give a fuck.

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I applied for a job not realizing I would need to pass a drug test, and smoked a few times in the last 7 days or so. Last time I smoked was yesterday, each time I've only had a few hits, maybe half a gram in total, max. I need to pass the test on tuesday.
I don't honestly care that much about the job, I can always apply somewhere else, but a family member works there and even if no one tells her that I failed the test, the interviewer told her i aced the interview, so everyone in my family will know that the reason I suddenly didn't get the job is because I...
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>>17289639
Grow up, kid.
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>>17289639
Buy one of the drinks that makes you pass the test. They're not expensive, and if I remember correctly you drink it, empty your bladder, and your next wee will be clear of THC.
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>>17289651
I don't really have time to have anything delivered to me. I've heard something about drinking water with gelatin packets and I could probably get that at the store, but I haven't seen anything about it in the last few days as I've been looking around online to figure out what I'm going to do.

How do I get a gf who looks like pic related?
10 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Be Tom Cruz.
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>>17289634
You don't.
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Be Ted Cruz

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I shaved my pussy yesterday and I woke up to this disgusting shit. It happens every fucking time I shave. What am I doing wrong??
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>>17289628
I'm hard now, thanks babe!

But uh yeah, don't shave your bush---trim it. Or wax. Idk I need to go fap now
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>>17289638
k not OP, but trimming usually makes it more prickly than just letting it be the longness of it's dreams
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>>17289638
I'm pretty sure you just got hard to some guy's beard faggot

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Yoga has changed my life. I want to share it with those whom it could benefit and are interested.
It bestows all the virtues of a valuable life. It increases your ability in just about everything - it is truly amazing. IT will give you a zeal for life itself!

Go to the Kriyas Section here at pinklotus.org
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Yoga is not a jew religion. It is one part of a very, very old religion.
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>>17289594
Um, that should be NEW religion. Very unfortunate typo. Sorry about that.
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>>17289590
You can get the same effect from smoking weed.

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I'm going to be about 75 dollars short on rent if I don't find a way to get some extra money, due to a family emergency where I had to travel.
I'm fairly certain my landlord would be cool with me asking for an extension but I'd honestly really rather not do that because I'll feel bad about it.
Anyone have a way to help?
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>>17289586
Why would you fee bad about it?
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Do you have a car?
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Best thing you can do is be open in communication. It also depends on how short you are on rent. If you're rent is 900$ then 75 isn't really a big deal and they might just tack on a late fee. If it's 300 bucks then yeah that might be an issue. But all you can do is talk to your landlord as soon as possible. If you're hurting for cash, there's always prostitution, selling your organs or other possessions, or, if you're truly desperate, payday loans

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I, (22M) have a friend (21F) that I'm absolutely infatuated with. We've been friends for about a year and as time went on became very close. We are both in long term relationships. We ended up fucking around a month ago.

While there's no doubt what we did was ethically wrong I was incredibly happy when it happened and the days following. I was seriously on cloud nine. We didn't do it again because we acknowledged it wasn't right but would wait and see how we felt as time went on.

So we've been hanging out the past month (It's...
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>>17289546
-continuing in this post.

I'm confused at this point why I'm barely hearing from her because I know she can't be sleeping ALL day for 5 days. I'm also a little confused why she wouldn't fill me in, which is what I would expect to happen normally. So I'm being boxed out which seemed unusual to me.

We planned to do something fun today (friday) which required scheduling. Well, she totally forgot and slept in and missed it. She said the whole FUCK FUCK IM SORRY, etc. and asked...
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-what the fuck do you do when you're this head over heels for someone? Especially when you get the sense you might not mean as much to them as they do to you? I can barely occupy myself to distract me from thinking of her. I know I'm a scumbag for cheating and immature and pathetic for being this obsessive of one person. At this point just typing this all out is a bit therapeutic, but i'll take just about any input on anything.
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Just dont be a coward. Your gf needs to know what you did and move on (as you clearly moved on , on her)
Also this new girl wants you to go and take her, declare your love and all that shit

You are both young, stupid and self centered. Just be young and stupid, that will be enough

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